I should have said storage, not memory, my bad. If Apple works for you cool, I don't mean to hate, but here's my deal-
My music library is 100+ Gig's and for the same price as an iphone I prefer to keep it on a USB device with no software, a full web browser, enough storage to hold it all plus movies and wirelessly stream video onto my TV, etc from my network hard-drive.
http://www.archos.com/products/gen_5...global&lang=en
As far as itunes goes- First, it shouldn't be necessary to begin with, so I hate it on general priciple. Secondly, in my limited experience it has tried to think for me and thus it royally ed up a music library I had spent hours upon hours editing.
This dude sums up a fairly similar problem pretty well-