Why are kids brainwashed into believing that they can do anything. . .?

[ploto]

Because, unless you're mentally deficient, you can do almost anything, if you work hard enough. That's the part most people forget. They just stop at the dreaming and imagining.

Often the dreams that kids are encouraged to hold onto are about natural talent that they simply do not have. I can't be an opera singer no matter how hard I work at it. I can't be a supermodel at 5'2".

[ploto]

It seems that the people that agree with the OP don't have kids. It's easy to say how you would feel or what you would do when you don't have kids.

I have a child. He knows that he can not be a professional athlete. He is fine with it. He knows that everyone has different gifts and that is not his. He can play sports for fun or comradery, but that is not his future.

[exstatic]

Often the dreams that kids are encouraged to hold onto are about natural talent that they simply do not have. I can't be an opera singer no matter how hard I work at it. I can't be a supermodel at 5'2".

Notice the word "almost" in my post. If there are 6 billion things to be, you can probably do 5,999,500,000 of them.

[CosmicCowboy]

There is absolutely nothing wrong with encouraging your kids set set high goals/expectations for themselves as long as you also counsel them on being prepared to do what it will take to live up to those expectations.

When my son was 16 and told me he wanted to be an attorney. I said...great!...but you understand that just being an attorney isn't enough, right? For every wealthy attorney you see there are 10 broke attorneys just barely scraping by and you don't want to be that guy. He agreed that he didn't want to be one of those guys scraping by doing wills and divorces...so we kind of laid out a plan to get where he wanted to go...scraping through St. Mary's wasn't gonna cut it...He shot for top Division I undergrad, Top 5 law school, law review, clerk for a federal judge, etc.

And that was great...I never again had to say "I want you to do this" or "I think you should do that"...

From then on, every time he started to get off track I would remind him that it was HIS dream, not mine. He kept the goals in mind with a few minor wobbles off track achieved everything he wanted to do.

[thispego]

you must not have kids. You will never understand until you look at your child and see all the potential in the world. When you look into her/his eyes and think to yourself, wow if she/he puts her mind to it they can do anything. It's as much for us as it is for them. Why in the world would someone look at their child and say "yeah she's going to be stuck working at walmart"? You would have to be a moron to not want the very best for your child and help them to believe that if they work hard and do their best that they can do anything.
If it wasn't true then we wouldn't have presidents, astronauts, pro ball players, etc.
So eff you, you emo asshole that is upset because you didn't become a cowboy that worked on the moon as a space policeman.

[thispego]

i only had my parents give me positive reimbursement growing up, and i managed to avoid the pratfalls my fellow neighborhood friends did. I achieved so much though, on the back of doubters saying i wouldn't finish high school or go to college that i believe that sometimes praise isn't the only thing a kid needs to be motivated by. Also, i understand that not many can take a negative and make it into a positive. I can still remember my first counselor telling me that i wouldn't make it in college and that i should really consider learning a trade or joining the military. While i think both those ideas are noble ideas to believe in, i don't like the fact that someone who is supposed to inspire you to reach new heights, would stoop to the level of discrediting the possibilities of a young mind.

[thispego]

i'll tell you why:

I have a son who is a whiz with legos. Buildings, spaceships, neighborhoods, you name it, that boy can design and build it. He's a pretty bright kid, and i'd like to see him in college for engineering or architecture someday. If i didn't tell him he could do it he'd probably end up like my dad, breaking his back in construction for years until his body gives out and leaves him broke and searching for a new career at 40 or 50.

sorry, but legos is not like engineering or architecture. There is not much design that goes into lego building.

[CosmicCowboy]

At the same time, parents have to be realistic. When my horse loving daughter that was just plain awful in math and science decided she wanted to be a Vet, I had to flat out tell her I didn't think she had the horsepower and testing skills to achieve that goal. The compe ion is just too tough. There are lots of dentists and doctors in Texas that did that because they couldn't get in vet school. Was I wrong? , I don't know. I know I told her the truth.

[lil'mo]

Your daughter loves horses? You think she could ever love a cow? I'd treat her right.

[mavs>spurs2]

sorry, but legos is not like engineering or architecture. There is not much design that goes into lego building.

Dude you are a ing . A small child building something impressive is a good indicator that he is very bright and intelligent for his age. Way to on someone else for being proud of their kid, asshole.

[Fillmoe]

pull your skiiirt up... SHIRLEY MUUUURDOCK!

[MannyIsGod]

Dude you are a ing . A small child building something impressive is a good indicator that he is very bright and intelligent for his age. Way to on someone else for being proud of their kid, asshole.

LOL

Yeah OK Mr. phobe.

[MannyIsGod]

It seems that the people that agree with the OP don't have kids. It's easy to say how you would feel or what you would do when you don't have kids.

I think it's hilarious how people tell you how you should raise kids when they themselves have never been a parent. "Oh but I have a dog and it is like my child"

Thats probably because people without kids tend to know how to do things right. 90% of people with kids failed at using birth control, for one.

[CosmicCowboy]

Thats probably because people without kids tend to know how to do things right. 90% of people with kids failed at using birth control, for one.

You shouldn't talk about your mother that way. Mistakes happen.

[thispego]

Dude you are a ing . A small child building something impressive is a good indicator that he is very bright and intelligent for his age. Way to on someone else for being proud of their kid, asshole.

have you ever played with legos? everything you build is impressive as long as you have enough pieces to yourself. , my two cousins and i used to sit there with 200 pieces between the three of us and we were still throwing together some impressive on our solo projects but it's not like we were sitting there with blue prints or making sure the lazers and shields were functional.

i'm sure desfloods little boy is super smart but i always laugh when a parent equates lego building with engineering or something. little boys like to stack and build things. it's not just your little one.

[gatoloco]

yeah, maybe legos aren't the best indicator, but they can show a childs creativity and tendency towards the chaotic or uniform...

best indicators for engineering would be more like being good at math, likes math, likes science...and for architecture...maybe likes to draw?

all that said, when the mookie crew has kids, the straight ones anyway, i'm sure they will watch with amazement at the things their kids build with legos and dare to dream as well...

[thispego]

yeah, maybe legos aren't the best indicator, but they can show a childs creativity and tendency towards the chaotic or uniform...

best indicators for engineering would be more like being good at math, likes math, likes science...and for architecture...maybe likes to draw?

all that said, when the mookie crew has kids, the straight ones anyway, i'm sure they will watch with amazement at the things their kids build with legos and dare to dream as well...

watch with amazement? :rofl i will not be amazed at anything my little boy does because i will expect only greatness. if he starts flying or speaking in a foreign language, now that would be amazing. but if is just doing regular baby things, i'm not going to sit here and act like my kid is doing something special that noone else kid is doing.

[CuckingFunt]

Instilling a sense of self-efficacy is good. Instilling an unrealistic sense of en lement is bad. I think most people would agree with that.

As for why it happens? Lots of reasons. People don't want to disappoint their kids, or they already have that sense of en lement themselves and just pass it on, or they may not know how to properly balance hopefulness with realism, and on and on.

You'll notice, too, that it's an at ude that is far more prevalent within culturally privileged groups than culturally oppressed groups, which is no accident. By instilling the thought that hard work is all that's needed for great success, it perpetuates the assumption that people who aren't successful are just lazy, which in turn masks all of the systemic ickiness working to keep entire segments of the population unsuccessful. It's pervasive as and quite effective.

[SpursWoman]

i'm not going to sit here and act like my kid is doing something special that noone else kid is doing.

What's really cool is when they get a little older, and you discover a talent that they have that most other kids DON"T have. My daughter is a ridiculously good artist ... she can spit out drawings in just a few minutes that never cease to blow my mind. And I'm not talking about paint-by-numbers. She's 14 ... I'm talking free hand, I know exactly what she was trying to draw, drawings.

I'm still trying to figure out what my son is good at that doesn't involve wireless controllers. Good thing I don't have a basement.

But when they are little ... everything they do is a miracle that no one has ever done, and if they have, then yours did it a month earlier than them. So, ha.

[MannyIsGod]

You shouldn't talk about your mother that way. Mistakes happen.

Dude I was obviously the result of a lack of birth control. I'm pretty sure that less than 10% of us here were planned. I wasn't even kidding about that.

[SpursWoman]

I don't know, I might say more than 10% are planned. My dad's family had nothing but boys, and my parents were furiously () trying for a girl when my mom conceived me ... so I wasn't failed birth control. That's kind of funny, though.

[baseline bum]

Dude I was obviously the result of a lack of birth control. I'm pretty sure that less than 10% of us here were planned. I wasn't even kidding about that.

10%? You can't be serious.

[CosmicCowboy]

Dude I was obviously the result of a lack of birth control. I'm pretty sure that less than 10% of us here were planned. I wasn't even kidding about that.

You shouldn't be so hard on yourself. When the genetic dice get rolled everyone can't be a seven. The world still needs Mannys to supersize our fries.

[MannyIsGod]

You shouldn't be so hard on yourself. When the genetic dice get rolled everyone can't be a seven. The world still needs Mannys to supersize our fries.

ROFL Just because I wasn't planned doesn't mean I'm not awesome bro.

[mrsmaalox]

So sad, some of you guys were apparently raised by some pretty douchy parents. But not as sad as it'll be for your kids. Eeek!