Jurassic World

[RD2191]

Jurrasic World ing sucked. There were so many things wrong with this movie. Don’t even know where to begin. This is BY FAR the worst Jurrasic Park film yet. The 3^rd one, which sucked , blows this one out of the ing water.

1 – The story sucked. Basically - a mutant T-Rex escapes and causes destruction. It chases two kids around the park and kills other dinosaurs/military guys trying to stop it. It’s 1 dinosaur, and it’s not even that smart, not scary-looking, and just doesn’t do well carrying the movie by itself at all.

2 – The characters were boring and they had some of the cheesiest lines ever. Seriously, two little kids, Chris Pratt, and a woman in a dress is what you’ve got here. And the only one who even has a pulse is Chris Pratt, and it’s a small one at that. I wanted the kids to die so bad halfway through the movie that it hurt.

3 – Trained Veliciraptors? How ing stupid. It destroyed their mystique entirely. Seriously, the raptors are the good guys in this movie. Can you imagine?

4 – It felt like I was watching the 2^nd, 3^rd, 4^th, 5^th transformers movies halfway through when the dinosaurs got loose. Dinosaurs fighting dinosaurs and killing people (and remember this is PG13, there’s not 1 ‘cool’ death in the movie) just mindless action. The last sequence, a raptor and the real T-rex fighting the mutant T-rex, was so cheesy that I nearly walked out of the theatre it was so bad. And yes, some jackasses in the theatre actually clapped when the raptor and T-rex were ultimately victorious. Little kids probably.

Conclusion – This movie doesn’t make you give a DAMN about any of the characters or any of the dinosaurs. There’s no intrigue. The story sucks. It’s a popcorn, brainless action movie that hurts the legacy of Jurassic Park. If you’re 12 years old or younger you might enjoy it. Otherwise, be prepared to be disappointed. That said, I know everyone will go see it. You have to, it’s Jurassic Park. But I’d give it a 3/10 on my scale and I feel that’s being generous.

clapping during a movie makes me want to punch someone. it's the gayest thing a person can do.

[Caltex2]

Jurrasic World ing sucked. There were so many things wrong with this movie. Don’t even know where to begin. This is BY FAR the worst Jurrasic Park film yet. The 3^rd one, which sucked , blows this one out of the ing water.

1 – The story sucked. Basically - a mutant T-Rex escapes and causes destruction. It chases two kids around the park and kills other dinosaurs/military guys trying to stop it. It’s 1 dinosaur, and it’s not even that smart, not scary-looking, and just doesn’t do well carrying the movie by itself at all.

2 – The characters were boring and they had some of the cheesiest lines ever. Seriously, two little kids, Chris Pratt, and a woman in a dress is what you’ve got here. And the only one who even has a pulse is Chris Pratt, and it’s a small one at that. I wanted the kids to die so bad halfway through the movie that it hurt.

3 – Trained Veliciraptors? How ing stupid. It destroyed their mystique entirely. Seriously, the raptors are the good guys in this movie. Can you imagine?

4 – It felt like I was watching the 2^nd, 3^rd, 4^th, 5^th transformers movies halfway through when the dinosaurs got loose. Dinosaurs fighting dinosaurs and killing people (and remember this is PG13, there’s not 1 ‘cool’ death in the movie) just mindless action. The last sequence, a raptor and the real T-rex fighting the mutant T-rex, was so cheesy that I nearly walked out of the theatre it was so bad. And yes, some jackasses in the theatre actually clapped when the raptor and T-rex were ultimately victorious. Little kids probably.

Conclusion – This movie doesn’t make you give a DAMN about any of the characters or any of the dinosaurs. There’s no intrigue. The story sucks. It’s a popcorn, brainless action movie that hurts the legacy of Jurassic Park. If you’re 12 years old or younger you might enjoy it. Otherwise, be prepared to be disappointed. That said, I know everyone will go see it. You have to, it’s Jurassic Park. But I’d give it a 3/10 on my scale and I feel that’s being generous.

Yeah, I noticed half the audience also clapped at the end of my showing. I suppose this will get mixed reviews. Not a great movie imo if for no other reason than that they jumped into the plot way too quickly and as you noted there were no memorable characters.

clapping during a movie makes me want to punch someone. it's the gayest thing a person can do.

No, they clapped at the end. The only movie I ever clapped at the end of (granted, I'm not an avid movie goer, so I see very few as they come out) was Gridiron Gang.

[bigzak25]

My sons are 8 and 4...but going on 9 and 5 in just a few short weeks...will this movie traumatized them or should we just get our ing tickets and buck up.

[Caltex2]

Unless they get scared they're gonna walk outside and get eaten by a dino (entirely possible), I think they're safe. They may even like that it's in 3D.

[cantthinkofanything]

clapping during a movie makes me want to punch someone. it's the gayest thing a person can do.

Trying to justify letting him on your face.

[jeebus]

FYI, if some of you are going off a review from a user who has one post and says it's worse than JP3, you should probably kill yourself. All 4 of his points make about as much sense as Pop playing Tony big minutes in the playoffs this year.

Without giving too much away, all I can say is they let the dinosaurs escape and cause havoc way too quickly. We barely even saw any of the remodeled park and attractions. If you're into special effects, graphics and all that; if you just like seeing dinosaurs cause havoc, go for it or maybe if you're going on a night out with the wife and kids but I don't recommend it otherwise.

.....uh, they didn't escape until at least 30 mins, maybe 45 mins into the movie. Would you rather the movie be about margaritaville, the hilton hotel, and what goes on in the control room for 1 1/2 hours then maybe 20 mins of dinosaurs then the ending? We see enough of the remodeled park and attractions. They showed the mosasaurus bit, the gyrosphere, the Rex viewing area, etc etc etc. What more did you want? What the inside of one of the gift shops looked like? This is a movie about dinosaurs, what the were you expecting?

[RD2191]

Trying to justify letting him on your face.

Wut

[cantthinkofanything]

Wut

Your boyfriend s on your face. But you think, "oh well, that's not the gayest thing."

[RD2191]

Your boyfriend s on your face. But you think, "oh well, that's not the gayest thing."

I don't have a boyfriend and I'm not gay.

[cantthinkofanything]

I don't have a boyfriend and I'm not gay.

Are you sure? Your definition of gay is clapping at movies. You might be surprised what it really entails.

[RD2191]

Are you sure? Your definition of gay is clapping at movies. You might be surprised what it really entails.

I'm sure that I am not gay.

[cantthinkofanything]

I'm sure that I am not gay.

You're killin me here. Did you catch your dad's semi re ness?

[RD2191]

You're killin me here. Did you catch your dad's semi re ness?

Maybe.

[Caltex2]

.....uh, they didn't escape until at least 30 mins, maybe 45 mins into the movie. Would you rather the movie be about margaritaville, the hilton hotel, and what goes on in the control room for 1 1/2 hours then maybe 20 mins of dinosaurs then the ending? We see enough of the remodeled park and attractions. They showed the mosasaurus bit, the gyrosphere, the Rex viewing area, etc etc etc. What more did you want? What the inside of one of the gift shops looked like? This is a movie about dinosaurs, what the were you expecting?

In the original, it didn't seem like the animals started to escape until at least an hour in and in the meantime there was an explanation of how the how park and the animals were conceived. In the Lost World, the San Diego Incident didn't take place until almost 2 hours in (or at least it seemed) and mass casualties didn't take place for a slightly shorter time before. In the latest installment, it only took about 30 minutes for there to be deaths due to dinosaurs and for one to escape. They could have focused more on the redesigned park and fill us in on how John Hammond's dream was finally realized after all of the bad publicity and trouble previously.

Long story short, we've already seen dinosaurs wreak havoc uncontrollably and eat humans and dinosaurs alike in all of the previous installments, show us more of something we haven't seen before. Like I said, more of it.

[Thebesteva]

Jurrasic World ing sucked. There were so many things wrong with this movie. Don’t even know where to begin. This is BY FAR the worst Jurrasic Park film yet. The 3^rd one, which sucked , blows this one out of the ing water.

1 – The story sucked. Basically - a mutant T-Rex escapes and causes destruction. It chases two kids around the park and kills other dinosaurs/military guys trying to stop it. It’s 1 dinosaur, and it’s not even that smart, not scary-looking, and just doesn’t do well carrying the movie by itself at all.

2 – The characters were boring and they had some of the cheesiest lines ever. Seriously, two little kids, Chris Pratt, and a woman in a dress is what you’ve got here. And the only one who even has a pulse is Chris Pratt, and it’s a small one at that. I wanted the kids to die so bad halfway through the movie that it hurt.

3 – Trained Veliciraptors? How ing stupid. It destroyed their mystique entirely. Seriously, the raptors are the good guys in this movie. Can you imagine?

4 – It felt like I was watching the 2^nd, 3^rd, 4^th, 5^th transformers movies halfway through when the dinosaurs got loose. Dinosaurs fighting dinosaurs and killing people (and remember this is PG13, there’s not 1 ‘cool’ death in the movie) just mindless action. The last sequence, a raptor and the real T-rex fighting the mutant T-rex, was so cheesy that I nearly walked out of the theatre it was so bad. And yes, some jackasses in the theatre actually clapped when the raptor and T-rex were ultimately victorious. Little kids probably.

Conclusion – This movie doesn’t make you give a DAMN about any of the characters or any of the dinosaurs. There’s no intrigue. The story sucks. It’s a popcorn, brainless action movie that hurts the legacy of Jurassic Park. If you’re 12 years old or younger you might enjoy it. Otherwise, be prepared to be disappointed. That said, I know everyone will go see it. You have to, it’s Jurassic Park. But I’d give it a 3/10 on my scale and I feel that’s being generous.

Jurassic World was awesome, and this is quite possibly the tiest first post in ST history.

Also, WTF is a Veliciraptors? You re ed piece of , learn how to spell.

[DarrinS]

Took my kids to see it yesterday. Super cheesy movie, as expected. Kids enjoyed it, tho.

[Caltex2]

Took my kids to see it yesterday. Super cheesy movie, as expected. Kids enjoyed it, tho.

As expected.

[2pac > Kobe]

Jurrasic World ing sucked. There were so many things wrong with this movie. Don’t even know where to begin. This is BY FAR the worst Jurrasic Park film yet. The 3^rd one, which sucked , blows this one out of the ing water.

1 – The story sucked. Basically - a mutant T-Rex escapes and causes destruction. It chases two kids around the park and kills other dinosaurs/military guys trying to stop it. It’s 1 dinosaur, and it’s not even that smart, not scary-looking, and just doesn’t do well carrying the movie by itself at all.

2 – The characters were boring and they had some of the cheesiest lines ever. Seriously, two little kids, Chris Pratt, and a woman in a dress is what you’ve got here. And the only one who even has a pulse is Chris Pratt, and it’s a small one at that. I wanted the kids to die so bad halfway through the movie that it hurt.

3 – Trained Veliciraptors? How ing stupid. It destroyed their mystique entirely. Seriously, the raptors are the good guys in this movie. Can you imagine?

4 – It felt like I was watching the 2^nd, 3^rd, 4^th, 5^th transformers movies halfway through when the dinosaurs got loose. Dinosaurs fighting dinosaurs and killing people (and remember this is PG13, there’s not 1 ‘cool’ death in the movie) just mindless action. The last sequence, a raptor and the real T-rex fighting the mutant T-rex, was so cheesy that I nearly walked out of the theatre it was so bad. And yes, some jackasses in the theatre actually clapped when the raptor and T-rex were ultimately victorious. Little kids probably.

Conclusion – This movie doesn’t make you give a DAMN about any of the characters or any of the dinosaurs. There’s no intrigue. The story sucks. It’s a popcorn, brainless action movie that hurts the legacy of Jurassic Park. If you’re 12 years old or younger you might enjoy it. Otherwise, be prepared to be disappointed. That said, I know everyone will go see it. You have to, it’s Jurassic Park. But I’d give it a 3/10 on my scale and I feel that’s being generous.

thanks bro!

[djohn2oo8]

8/10. Definitely better than 2 and 3.

[djohn2oo8]

Jurassic World was awesome, and this is quite possibly the tiest first post in ST history.

Also, WTF is a Veliciraptors? You re ed piece of , learn how to spell.

This. About the Raptors evolving into.being trained, that was new and cool to see.

[djohn2oo8]

In the original, it didn't seem like the animals started to escape until at least an hour in and in the meantime there was an explanation of how the how park and the animals were conceived. In the Lost World, the San Diego Incident didn't take place until almost 2 hours in (or at least it seemed) and mass casualties didn't take place for a slightly shorter time before. In the latest installment, it only took about 30 minutes for there to be deaths due to dinosaurs and for one to escape. They could have focused more on the redesigned park and fill us in on how John Hammond's dream was finally realized after all of the bad publicity and trouble previously.

Long story short, we've already seen dinosaurs wreak havoc uncontrollably and eat humans and dinosaurs alike in all of the previous installments, show us more of something we haven't seen before. Like I said, more of it.

They left it open for that at the end with the Doctor, etc about Hammond's dream. The only complaint is there should have been more bloodshed.

[Caltex2]

I was neither pleased nor dissatisfied with the movie.

[spursfan09]

I didn't know dr wu was evil

[jeebus]

In the original, it didn't seem like the animals started to escape until at least an hour in and in the meantime there was an explanation of how the how park and the animals were conceived. In the Lost World, the San Diego Incident didn't take place until almost 2 hours in (or at least it seemed) and mass casualties didn't take place for a slightly shorter time before. In the latest installment, it only took about 30 minutes for there to be deaths due to dinosaurs and for one to escape. They could have focused more on the redesigned park and fill us in on how John Hammond's dream was finally realized after all of the bad publicity and trouble previously.

Long story short, we've already seen dinosaurs wreak havoc uncontrollably and eat humans and dinosaurs alike in all of the previous installments, show us more of something we haven't seen before. Like I said, more of it.

So you wanted it to be all about the park instead of the dinosaurs? That movie would ing suck.

Took my kids to see it yesterday. Super cheesy movie, as expected. Kids enjoyed it, tho.

The Jurassic Park movies are supposed to be like B movies, as Spielberg intended. Cheesy moments, over the top, not super serious all the time, etc. People seem to forget this and go in wanting to see Schindler's List. Especially that chumper guy.

[jeebus]

I didn't know dr wu was evil

He wants det money. If you were the go to guy on the planet for something, in his case making dinos, wouldn't you want to protect that? I'd be evil as .