teen sexuality and sexual health

[A Serbian Beast]

Dear TeenHealthFX,

I was having sex with my girlfriend, when right before I "orgasm" I pee?d inside her. I knew it was pee when I withdrew and it was still dripping. Will everything be all right with her?

Signed: Useruser666

[hussker]

Dear Anonymous,

Phone sex is when you place a telephone into your anus. It's very safe unless you forget to clean it off and your sister is trying to use it to call into American Idol. Then it can be harmful when you're beaten into a bloody pulp using the phone as a blunt weapon.

Cyber sex is a rarity unless you live in Detroit. This act occurs when Robocop answers a distress call and is willing to have intercourse with you. It's very safe considering that Officer Murphy's member is now encased in stainless steel.

Warmest regards,

TeenHealthFX

Also, Avoid the cordless phone or the cellular!

[Trainwreck2100]

Mark (12-14) asks...

One time my brother and I had oral sex. Does this make me a weirdo?

Dear Mark,

You're not a weirdo, YOU'RE AN INCESTUAL FREAK AND YOU'RE GOING TO .
that is all.

[TheTruth]

^

[j-6]

: I am almost 20 years old, and I still haven't fully matured. Is this ok, do some people take longer to develop, is there a cut-off date for growth or something? My penis size isn't that great, and I don't think it has grown completely or as much as it should have. The only other thing that makes me worry is the fact that everyone says I look like I am 16, and I hate that, it gets to you after awhile. Everything else is ok, the voice changed, and I have all the hair and all. Just the one thing that worries me.

OK, I'm liquored up enough to offer advise now.

Dear Will,

You are one of the luckiest men alive. Do you realize as long as you leave your ID at home, you can chase down high school girls? Just say that HS wasn't challenging enough for you, so you dropped out, got a GED, went to community college, and now is about to leave for whatever well known party university is in your region. Regardless of the size of your penis, you'll keep him busy enough.

The other piece of luck you have is looking like you're 25 when you're 30 and 30 when you're 40. You will bang every stripper worth your time and trouble soon. So get in the practice with the high school girls while you still can.

Live strong,

TeenHealthFX

[j-6]

My 8 year old daughter has started masturbating since we got her to stop sucking her thumb. She seems to be doing it many times a day. She even will spend long periods of time in our swimming pool against the return where the water jets out. Do you have any advice?

Dear A Concerned Father,

If you play your cards right, your little concern is going to be your little trip to riches. With a love for sucking flesh and masturbating multiple times in a day has been established in her fertile young mind, a career in the lucrative pornographic arts is right around the corner.

Since she's eight, you have ten years to implement your plan. Leave copies of Showgirls and Striptease in her Dora DVD boxes for starters. Have her walking in clear 4" heels as quickly as possible. Enroll her in gymnastics to perfect her pole techniques. Purchase body spray by the case. Encourage boyfriends with legal issues to loosen up her mind, body, and spirit.

And make sure she keeps up the thumb sucking and masturbation. One day, she'll graduate from adult club entertainer to adult film entertainer. Then you'll never have to count $1 bills again.

Happy retirement,

TeenHealthFX

[batman2883]

Dear A Concerned Father,

If you play your cards right, your little concern is going to be your little trip to riches. With a love for sucking flesh and masturbating multiple times in a day has been established in her fertile young mind, a career in the lucrative pornographic arts is right around the corner.

Since she's eight, you have ten years to implement your plan. Leave copies of Showgirls and Striptease in her Dora DVD boxes for starters. Have her walking in clear 4" heels as quickly as possible. Enroll her in gymnastics to perfect her pole techniques. Purchase body spray by the case. Encourage boyfriends with legal issues to loosen up her mind, body, and spirit.

And make sure she keeps up the thumb sucking and masturbation. One day, she'll graduate from adult club entertainer to adult film entertainer. Then you'll never have to count $1 bills again.

Happy retirement,

TeenHealthFX

ha ha ha ah aha h holy that was ing funny clear heels are always the way to signal s

[mavsfan1000]

bump

[A Serbian Beast]

Dear TeenHealthFX,

I am a female. It seems like a lot of guys I have talked to lately just want to get to know me to have sex. Is this common in guys or have I just been hanging around the wrong people?

Signed: Guys Want Me For The Wrong Reasons

[mavsfan1000]

that one is lame

[A Serbian Beast]

yea, but the girl is stupid.

[A Serbian Beast]

Dear TeenHealthFX,

I'm 15 when I tried to have sex with my girlfriend I could not get hard enough to stick my thing inside of her. Tell me what is wrong - this is my first time too

Signed: ALVAREZ6
----
Cmon guys, we gotta help ALVAREZ6 out.

[A Serbian Beast]

Dear TeenHealthFX,

My balls itch. What Can I do to make it stop? Also, there are little bugs crawling around them.

Signed: mouse

[A Serbian Beast]

Dear TeenHealthFX,

Last year I noticed a slightly smaller penis growing beneath my "original" one. Is it normal for a guy to grow a second penis? I asked my friends about this but none of them take me seriously. Should I see a doctor?

Signed: Two Penises

[TheTruth]

Hey serb, WTF were you doing on TeenHealthFX anyway?
You got some problems you want to tell us about?


, I'd give my left nut for a second penis.

[A Serbian Beast]

its my bible...jk. nah, someone sent me the link and i thought most of the things people wrote in were funny as .

[Trainwreck2100]

Dear TeenHealthFX,

I'm 15 when I tried to have sex with my girlfriend I could not get hard enough to stick my thing inside of her. Tell me what is wrong - this is my first time too

Signed: ALVAREZ6
----
Cmon guys, we gotta help ALVAREZ6 out.

Dear Alvy either you don't have any sexual attraction to your girlfriend or you're a sexual, and she is your unwitting beard.

Yous in Christ
TR2100

[j-6]

Dear TeenHealthFX,

I am a female. It seems like a lot of guys I have talked to lately just want to get to know me to have sex. Is this common in guys or have I just been hanging around the wrong people?

Signed: Guys Want Me For The Wrong Reasons

Dear Guys Want Me For The Wrong Reasons,

You have it all wrong, my dear. Guys are talking to you so their friends don't figure them out for the cross-dressing queens they aspire to become. The only reason they are talking about sex with you is to learn more about the straight variety of intercourse to lie about in the locker room.

But you, young lady, are God's great equalizer. Do you realize that the more of these young men that you speak of you actually have sex with, the more they will savor and embrace the straight experience? They'll grow up and drive their Tahoes through the suburbs with their happy families, and will have you to thank. Your best plan is to sleep with as many of them, just one time per salvation project, as often as possible. God put you on this planet to eradicate sexuality. Open your legs and do something about it.

Happy to help,

TeenHealthFX

[j-6]

Dear TeenHealthFX,

I'm 15 when I tried to have sex with my girlfriend I could not get hard enough to stick my thing inside of her. Tell me what is wrong - this is my first time too

Signed: ALVAREZ6

Dear Alvarez,

This is the type of thing you should really be telling your Dad, or if he's serving a term in prison, the new uncle your mom introduced you to. Showing you what you're doing wrong is easier to outline than to follow written directions. Besides, you'd look like a tool trying to hump her while reading this letter.

Take Dad or another father figure to begin the act of intercourse with your girlfriend. Then start masturbating. Whenever you're hard enough to perform, ask Dad to put his penis in her mouth and you take over downstairs. When you are ready to ejaculate, ask him to vacate her mouth. He'll be so glad that he's helping out, he'll do anything you ask of him. Precious father-son moments such as these are not to be passed up.

With fondness,

TeenHealthFX