Transgender teen kills herself and suicide note goes viral

[Cry Havoc]

Nor can you say with certainty that it wasn't a phase or a form of teenage rebellion.

As a parent of teenagers, I can say that "phases" with kids in high school these days are getting more and more extreme. Not saying that every kid in high school who says they are gay is doing it for attention, but there are a lot of kids doing it for attention. Some are passive-aggressively reacting to a home situation that is not supportive on many levels. Some are fringe kids taking the "I'm not part of the rich cool crowd" to the next shock level. Some are taking advantage of the social celebrity status. And all of this hurts the teenagers who are actually gay and want to be seen as just normal kids and keep the private things where the private things should be. Private is not the same as scared to come out of the closet. Not everyone wants to be the voice or the face of a "movement". Despite what social media seems to shove down our throats, not every gay teenager wants to turn a walk down the hallway between classes into a Gay Parade.

In his senior year, my son had one of his friends commit suicide. Yes, he was gay. But he was also very socially awkward and was easily on the autism/aspergers spectrum. No one can point to any external incidents or patterns at school or at home related to him being gay that drove him to kill himself. He had very supportive parents. He was fighting some battle in his head and lost. But the narrative was that he killed himself because he was gay, because being gay HAD to be the only reason he would kill himself. This is the only narrative we are allowed to have when it comes to bad things happening to teenagers who happen to be gay.

As a parent of teenagers again, I need to support my kids. But supporting my kids doesn't mean doubling down on every "decision" they make in their lives. Sometimes the best way to support them is to not let them act on decisions that they may regret down the road. My job as a parent is not fulfill every desire that my child has; in fact, enablement is a classic form of bad parenting. This is not to say that every action and at ude taken by these specific parents was right or wrong. But if my son came to me at 17 and said he wanted me to fund his transgender process to become my daughter, I would have refused as well. That is a forever life-altering decision that needs to be made with a bit more maturity and a lot less teenage high school social angst. And there is nothing wrong with me refusing to do this. Nor is there anything wrong with thinking it is wrong. I don't have to accept everything that my kids do just because they are my kids. Again, loving my kids doesn't equate to enabling every desire that they have.

This extreme and unfortunate situation is what drives a very false narrative that all gay teens are "loud and proud" and all of their Christian parents are praying the gay out of them. The exception gets championed as the norm, and the internets get full of debates about horrible parents who don't fund transgender operations for their boys who are not of legal age to make those decisions for themselves.

That's why it's your job to parent and make a parental decision about your teen's feelings. If your teenager, for instance, had talked for 10 years about wanting to be a firefighter, or wanting to be a chef, and they involved in activities to continually pursue that dream, then I think you would do your child a world of harm to treat it like a phase.

Similarly, if your child says they've felt differently than they should since they were 4, continually acts in a way that is not of the norm for their physical sexual characteristics, and actively pursues ways to make themselves appear more feminine (such as we see in this case), then all the hand-waving about it being a phase is probably you being unrealistic as a parent.

This also illustrates the need for counseling and therapy for youth who are in distress. If your child is routinely acting out, routinely engaging in dangerous behaviors and remains defiant/obstinate to their own detriment, then it's probably them trying to tell you that they're struggling a great deal to get a handle on their life. Being gay might not be the only reason a child kills themselves, but being gay and/or trans can have a massively negative impact on their self-esteem and self-image, especially given how difficult that situation is for a lot of the older generations to accept. You definitely shouldn't be an enabler of negative behavior, but you SHOULD as a parent know when your child is absolutely serious down to their core about something.

[ClipperLuva]

Time for an exorcism imo. The power of Christ compels you..

[sandman]

That's why it's your job to parent and make a parental decision about your teen's feelings. If your teenager, for instance, had talked for 10 years about wanting to be a firefighter, or wanting to be a chef, and they involved in activities to continually pursue that dream, then I think you would do your child a world of harm to treat it like a phase.

Similarly, if your child says they've felt differently than they should since they were 4, continually acts in a way that is not of the norm for their physical sexual characteristics, and actively pursues ways to make themselves appear more feminine (such as we see in this case), then all the hand-waving about it being a phase is probably you being unrealistic as a parent.

This also illustrates the need for counseling and therapy for youth who are in distress. If your child is routinely acting out, routinely engaging in dangerous behaviors and remains defiant/obstinate to their own detriment, then it's probably them trying to tell you that they're struggling a great deal to get a handle on their life. Being gay might not be the only reason a child kills themselves, but being gay and/or trans can have a massively negative impact on their self-esteem and self-image, especially given how difficult that situation is for a lot of the older generations to accept. You definitely shouldn't be an enabler of negative behavior, but you SHOULD as a parent know when your child is absolutely serious down to their core about something.

I can promise you that I have had much more involvement in being a Christian parent with a gay teenager than you have, so I don't need a sermon about what I am supposed to do as a parent. High school kids killing themselves because their parent won't fund their sex-change operation is an extreme example of the whole "gay teen with unsupportive parents" stereotype and simply not worth a debate.

[Jacob1983]

Why should the parents have to foot the bill for that ? Is it life threatening? A sex change operation is like getting butt or boob implants or botox. It's not vital to your life. And don't give me any bull . Your brain and heart aren't going to stop working because you don't look like the gender you want to be.

[DJR210]

[Blake]

Who's the chick in the bottom left?

[cantthinkofanything]

Who's the chick in the bottom left?

[Blake]

Ohhhhh.



Still have no clue.

[cantthinkofanything]

Ohhhhh.



Still have no clue.

her plastic surgery ed up

[Blake]

Ohhhhh.



No, still don't know what she's famous for

[DJR210]

Who's the chick in the bottom left?

Backdoor teen mom, Farrah Abraham

No, still don't know what she's famous for

Taking James Deen's up the butt and being one of the stupidest, most delusional human beings alive.

[DJR210]

She does have a nice, roast beefy pussy though.

[ohmwrecker]

She was working at a strip club here in Austin for a while.

[DJR210]

She was working at a strip club here in Austin for a while.

Yeah, she's a full blown skank now. She has molds of her pussy and all kinds of for sale too.

[ashbeeigh]

She let her ing mother take custody of her daughter because her daughter "needed some me time." She is ing horrible.

[DJR210]

She let her ing mother take custody of her daughter because her daughter "needed some me time." She is ing horrible.

deadbeat
"me time"
"doesn't do porn"
stripping a part of her "research"

Signed a million dollar deal for her first porn, probably made half of that on her 2nd one and all the sex toys and dancing, but doesn't have the means to take care of her daughter and balance her career?

She got destroyed on that celebrity couples reunion show a while back, was funny.

[ashbeeigh]

deadbeat
"me time"
"doesn't do porn"
stripping a part of her "research"

Signed a million dollar deal for her first porn, probably made half of that on her 2nd one and all the sex toys and dancing, but doesn't have the means to take care of her daughter and balance her career?

She got destroyed on that celebrity couples reunion show a while back, was funny.

All the girls from Teen Mom are a mess, but at least Leah knows she's a hot mess. Farrah thinks this is cute. If I ever came across her in Austin I'd punch her in her fat ing lips.

[DJR210]

If I ever came across her in Austin I'd punch her in her fat ing lips.

Bet..she works at the Palazio

[Strange Love]

Bet..she works at the Palazio

Bro...you watch this teen mom ?

[DJR210]

Bro...you watch this teen mom ?

Yeah, Backdoor Teen Mom.

[DMC]

Male/female roles are not culturally defined exclusively. You're putting the cart before the horse. Male/female are naturally defined and as such, cultures have adopted to nature's limitations. The man cannot get pregnant, that's not a cultural issue. The woman cannot hunt down game or defend the camp. That's not a cultural issue. Women are naturally weaker than men in many ways, and they are more emotionally unstable for various reasons. That's a natural construct, not a cultural one. Pretending a woman can be a man and vice versa is the cultural construct.

[I. Hustle]

[Chinook]

I was just thinking about this situation, actually. I do wonder if the reaction would be different had this happened now. I know that it was just a year-and-a-half ago or whatever, but a lot has changed in terms of LGBT rights/protections since then. Still think that kid was selfish and doesn't deserve to be remembered as anything else by the general public.

[Spurminator]

I was just thinking about this situation, actually. I do wonder if the reaction would be different had this happened now. I know that it was just a year-and-a-half ago or whatever, but a lot has changed in terms of LGBT rights/protections since then. Still think that kid was selfish and doesn't deserve to be remembered as anything else by the general public.

Yeah, it's still super ty that the parents got harassed.