Moving in with your S.O.

[midgetonadonkey]

bones, go out there, have some ing fun...mind yo bills and work your out issue by issue as they come...

everyone here had someone in their ear telling them what to do/what not to do, and we all ed up a little along the way anyway...just keep going forward and don't forget to laugh...

You are so ing wise...

I never had anyone in my ear telling me what to do. I did up a little but it was my own problem. Don't act like what everyone here did was because of some else. The majority of people telling this little to think for herself would agree that it is based on personal decisions.

[Spurfect]

if not I always have my house to go back to. I bet it sucks having to go back home once you leave, but at least i'll learn from my own experience.

remember how hard it was when I moved back, how I was crying about it that one time with you? haha. it was pretty hard. but I got used to it lol

[THE SIXTH MAN]

this thread turned out to be pretty entertaining.

[Bigzax]

You are so ing wise...

I never had anyone in my ear telling me what to do. I did up a little but it was my own problem. Don't act like what everyone here did was because of some else. The majority of people telling this little to think for herself would agree that it is based on personal decisions.

who are you that i give a ? i don't deal with dudes that bleed bro...i had enough of that with mouse...move along donk, move along...

[THE SIXTH MAN]

So whats the money situation?

Do you make more than him?

Has he lived on his own before...have you?

What do you do if he picks his nose in front of you, cries, craps his pants in your bed in the midst of a drunken stupor?

What happens if he wants a night out without you?

Do you have medical coverage?

How are you splitting the rent, bills, food money?

Joint insurance for the cars?

Both names on the bills?

How are going to divide up the extra spending money or fun money?

If you aren't combining income as one functional unit and he comes home with new cloths and bag full of CDs and you're over drawn in the bank account how will that make you feel?

What if he invites the boys over for the game and they clog the toilet and won't leave?

What if your car breaks down and you need a ride but he's low on gas money?

What if he gets comfortable and gains weight? What if you do?

Are you expecting him to still pay if you go out?

Does he have a clue what being on the rag really is?

Do you have a good relationship with his family and does he with yours?

Are any of you going to continue school? Who will help cover for the other if said schooling ends up cutting into actual work time thus cutting income?

Can you or he cook any more than 3 dishes?

How often should you eat out?

What have you really thought about?

^^^This is probably the best post in this thread. As much as people are telling you to just go out and have fun, there's a lot of things to be taken seriously like the financial aspect of living out on your own. You haven't really gone in to detail on what your situation really is, so it would be pretty hard to give you the right advice based on what you're going through. You should also take in to consideration that everyones situation is different. So evaluate your position and go from there.

[mrsmaalox]

I was citing one example.

The most recent example happens to be today....

She went in to get some birthday gifts for her niece, but she didn't want the nephews (4) to get jealous....so she bought "back to school" gifts for the boys and "back to school" plus birthday gifts for the neice. I didn't look at the bill but I'm guessing it was well over $100.

She was suprised I didn't say anything, but I figure two things...

1) It was money she earned at her job that she used

2) If you're gonna spend money, spending it on family is a good way to do it....guess that's because I'm a family kinda guy.

So $100+ was the latest damage....

Sounds like you all were made for each other!

[SpursWoman]

DAMN!!! How the can the woman get out of "Le Targhay" minus only 50 bucks?! My husband really wants to know!!!!

It's biologically impossible. S y and I have tried over, and over, and over again.

[JoeChalupa]

Don't you also prefer that they not wear makeup? Was that you?

Yup. My daughters wear no makeup or nail polish. My oldest is 13. I don't play the "friends" game when it comes to parenting.

[BacktoBasics]

^^^This is probably the best post in this thread. As much as people are telling you to just go out and have fun, there's a lot of things to be taken seriously like the financial aspect of living out on your own. You haven't really gone in to detail on what your situation really is, so it would be pretty hard to give you the right advice based on what you're going through. You should also take in to consideration that everyones situation is different. So evaluate your position and go from there.

Too bad this was never about real and all about story telling and fantasy land.

[SpursWoman]

Yup. My daughters wear no makeup or nail polish. My oldest is 13. I don't play the "friends" game when it comes to parenting.

I don't know how that equates to playing the "friends" game, letting them grow up and make their own decisions with the right amount of guidance is more about non-authoritarian parenting, not friendship. Although, I'm not a total pushover ... she's not dating until she's 30. Boys can hurt her, makeup can't.

But obviously everyone is different ... and perfectly en led to be. As long as others keep their nose out of other people's business and save their judgements for themselves ... and recognize that not everyone thinks or has to think the same way they do the world would be a much friendlier place. Because I get plenty of *business* about my current relationship status, but we're very functional and happy as a family. What my last name is really isn't going to effect that.

I know first hand how devestating blind faith can be, so I'm inclined to have a much more cautious approach to relationships and marriage ... an ounce of prevention and all that ... and happen to think that testing the waters by actually living together first is that ounce of prevention. You can eat an apple a day and still need to see the doctor, it's not fool-proof, but at least you're trying.

And I'd have tried for more cliches, but I actually am kind of busy today.

[The sone]

I wanted to ask because I've personally never moved in with a boyfriend before. I've seen other couples live together and have it work out and others fail miserably so that's why I wanted to ask. In my previous relationships I never wanted to live with them.. this is the first time I've felt this way. The only thing I'm hesitant on is if we could make it financially on our own. That's why I'm giving it some time so we can save up money to get in a better position.

if finances are questionable then you should just stay put. when money is tight there is nothing but problems. especially when youre used to having things a certain way. move out on your own first...figure out who YOU are. when youre ok with being alone...THEN youre ready to be with someone. theres a lot more id want to say but im kindda in class right now...

[BacktoBasics]

Yup. My daughters wear no makeup or nail polish. My oldest is 13. I don't play the "friends" game when it comes to parenting.

My father didn't play the friends game with me either. We've haven't talked in 11 years. I'd say he missed out on a good friend.

[ZStomp]

if finances are questionable then you should just stay put. when money is tight there is nothing but problems. especially when youre used to having things a certain way. move out on your own first...figure out who YOU are. when youre ok with being alone...THEN youre ready to be with someone. theres a lot more id want to say but im kindda in class right now...

Class my ass!

[ZStomp]

My father didn't play the friends game with me either. We've haven't talked in 11 years. I'd say he missed out on a good friend.

Ouch. That sux. You can't be a dad all your life.... at least, I don't think so.

[The sone]

Ouch. That sux. You can't be a dad all your life.... at least, I don't think so.

thats a tough paradox... on the one hand you know the dad is looking out for what he thinks is in the childs best interests...but at the same time...how you gonna one day let this person go out into the world without them even knowing what the world is, i mean the iron fist works if you intend on ruling indefinately. but once that is gone, the subjects are lost.

[BacktoBasics]

thats a tough paradox... on the one hand you know the dad is looking out for what he thinks is in the childs best interests...but at the same time...how you gonna one day let this person go out into the world without them even knowing what the world is, i mean the iron fist works if you intend on ruling indefinately. but once that is gone, the subjects are lost.

Well I see what you are saying but in my situation I got the iron fist after I was living independently on my own without anyones help. I don't have a problem with parents so long as you are willing to maintain a level relationship when the child becomes an adult. In my situation my father wanted to lord over me as an adult and friendship was never an options so him I'll go my own way without him, I don't need another boss.

I think its important for children to grow up and earn enough respect from their parents that one day they share a friendly relationship. I just wanted to have a beer and shoot some pool.

[ShoogarBear]

i mean the iron fist works if you intend on ruling indefinately. but once that is gone, the subjects are lost.

Well, there's always the remote-controlled electric collar.