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  1. #1
    It happens. Samr's Avatar
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    First TIMMYD started this thread.

    Then, a bunch of us started writing stuff like
    Dejuan Blair never bangs the same chick twice because he's always on the rebound.
    and
    People keep saying DeJuan Blair doesn’t have ACLs. I contend they’re just hiding from him.
    thus spun-off the website: DeJuan Blair FACTS!


    So now, let's have some fun with this. The basic guidelines:


    - Pretty much anything goes. But, try to keep the language and content forum-decent.


    - At least make an attempt at something original. And if you're not original... at least just try to hide it, that work? (e.g. please no Chuck Norris jokes we've heard a thousand times; DeJuan Blair does not roundhouse kick )


    - Unless I hear differently, I'm using your handle on here as authorial credit. If you don't want your FACT! on there, let me know. No big deal at all, I promise. In my mind the only thing worse than not giving someone appropriate credit is quoting them on something they don't want seen.

    - I may occasionally change a word or two. Don't worry. It's probably either to correct the grammar or make it funnier. You still get credit no matter what.




    [Mods: I'm just trying to have some fun here and kill some time, but if you feel that this thread in any way violates forum policy (like by posting another website), by all means delete it. Like I said above, it's no big deal.]

  2. #2
    It happens. Samr's Avatar
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    The list thus far:

    1. When DeJuan Blair hits the gym, it breaks. –Samr

    2. DeJuan Blair doesn't fight for rebounds; he uses telepathy to bring the balls to him. -Samr

    3. One time DeJuan passed Thabeet in the mall. Thabeet was out 4-6 weeks. -Samr

    4. DeJuan Blair was the latest inductee to Greek mythology. –Samr

    5. Dejuan Blair once blocked out both centers and rebounded a jump ball. –“spurs_fan_in_exile”

    6. Dejuan Blair never bangs the same chick twice because he's always on the rebound. –“spurs_fan_in_exile”

    7. Dejuan Blair once cut his own break cables. Anyone or anything foolish enough to try to stop Dejuan Blair must pay the price. –“spurs_fan_in_exile”

    8. When DeJuan Blair plays there is no halftime show. The fans simply wait in anticipation. -Samr

    9. DeJuan Blair, similar to Barkley, is banned from Vegas. The difference is, Blair hasn't lost any money -- he's a gamble that always wins. -Samr

    10. DeJuan Blair's quads ate up his acls because they were inferior. –Samr

    11. DeJuan Blair once missed a double-double, because other team only missed 9 shots. –“Riverwalkman”

    12. DeJuan Blair does not fight for rebounds because the word fighting implies the possibility of failure. He just goes grabbing. –“Riverwalkman”

    13. DeJuan Blair always creates the first stat of a game by rebounding. –“Riverwalkman”

    14. DeJuan Blair doesn't have career-ending injuries. He injures careers. -Samr

    15. Rebounding against DeJuan Blair requires a special permit and medical clearance. -Samr

    16. DeJuan Blair had to get a CDL for his posterior. -Samr

    17. DeJuan Blair was signed to cleanup the boards, and after he finished early, he decided to clean up the East Side as well. -Samr

    18. After DeJuan Blair threw Thabeet over his back, he looked toward the Pitt bench, smiled, and said "done." –Samr

    19. DeJuan Blair does have ACL's, That mofo is Always Collecting Loose ballS –“Slydragon”

    20. DeJuan Blair gets more balls in his hands per night than a hooker does all week –“Slydragon”

    21. Crop circles are DeJuan Blair's way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down. –“Spursfan09”

    22. Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. DeJuan Blair has 72... and they're all poisonous. –“Spursfan09”

    23. Police label anyone trying to rebound over DeJuan Blair as a Code 45-11.... a suicide. –“Spursfan09”

    24. "I went over to check on him, to say are you all right? Are we cool?" Blair said. "And he just walked past me. If that's the way you want to be, then that's fine. I'd do it again. Don't stick your arm in there." –DeJuan Blair, after he took Hasheem Thabeet and just… ah go look it up on YouTube, you’ll be glad you did

    25. DeJuan Blair was once in a knife fight. The knife lost. –“Spursfan09”

    26. People keep saying DeJuan Blair doesn’t have ACLs. I contend they’re just hiding from him. –“Blackjack21”

    27. When DeJuan Blair wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken. –“Spursfan09”

    28. The Venus de Milo was actually built as a memorial for the first guy that ever tried to rebound against Dejuan Blair. –“Spurs_fan_in_exile”

    29. DeJuan Blair doesn't get the blue screen of death. The blue screen of death gets DeJuan Blair. –Samr

    30. Nobody knew what horror the people saw in the Blair which Project. Now we do. –“Peacemaker885”

    31. DeJuan Blair was once asked how many arms he planned to rip off per game. He responded "Oh I'd say four to five at least." Thus, his jersey number was selected. As a warning sign. –Samr

    32. DeJuan Blair averages a double-double; 10 asses kicked, 10 names taken. –“Dex”

  3. #3
    Believe. smrattler's Avatar
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    FACT or FICTION:

    - Dejuan Blair once broke a guy's arm when they shook hands before tipoff.

  4. #4
    Chinese Spurs fan Riverwalkman's Avatar
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    Some of the Facts are obviously Chuck Norris Facts.
    25.DeJuan Blair was once in a knife fight. The knife lost.
    27.When DeJuan Blair wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.

  5. #5
    It happens. Samr's Avatar
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    Coach Pop gives praise to George Hill in the media. DeJuan Blair tells the media about Coach Pop.

  6. #6
    Veteran honestfool84's Avatar
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    Some of the Facts are obviously Chuck Norris Facts.



    i think all “Spursfan09”'s facts are Chuck Norris facts.

  7. #7
    Keith Jackson mookie2001's Avatar
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    wow if someone were to combine this with a lol kitten and a kanye west interruption it could be the most hackneyed, tired and unoriginal bull in the history of the internets

  8. #8
    It happens. Samr's Avatar
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    Yeah, Spursfan092120 was shortened to Spursfan09 (I'm assuming that's ok?)

    I'm trying to keep this kind of original. There are a ton of people on here that are naturally funny (go see the original thread for proof. spurs_fan_in_exile, I'm looking at you... and a few others). I'm not sure about licensing/fair use laws, otherwise I'd put the images from the original thread on the website as well. Awesome. All of it was awesome.

  9. #9
    We'll Be Back Spursfan092120's Avatar
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    i think all “Spursfan09”'s facts are Chuck Norris facts.
    lol...I think like 2 of them I came up with..the rest are from the man with the fist under his beard...lol

  10. #10
    We'll Be Back Spursfan092120's Avatar
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    Yeah, Spursfan092120 was shortened to Spursfan09 (I'm assuming that's ok?)
    it's all good.

  11. #11
    We'll Be Back Spursfan092120's Avatar
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    DeJuan Blair doesn't jump up to grab rebounds. The ball finds his hands and falls into them out of fear.

  12. #12
    It happens. Samr's Avatar
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    dejuan blair doesn't jump up to grab rebounds. The ball finds his hands and falls into them out of fear.
    fact!

    **edit** I changed it to "Spursfan092120" per request.
    Last edited by Samr; 10-13-2009 at 11:15 PM.

  13. #13
    We'll Be Back Spursfan092120's Avatar
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    yeah..lol..that one's mine...no Chuck Norris on that one..

  14. #14
    We'll Be Back Spursfan092120's Avatar
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    Yeah, Spursfan092120 was shortened to Spursfan09 (I'm assuming that's ok?)
    Actually you might want to change that, because there is someone else named Spursfan09 on here.

  15. #15
    Ghost of Mr. K SenorSpur's Avatar
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    Somewhere James Gist is jealous.

  16. #16
    Ginobeelee AOMrep's Avatar
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    When Freddy Krugar sleeps he has nightmares about The Grizley Blair!!

    When Jaws is in the ocean chilling he knows Dejuan Blair is coming when HE hears the music.

    Red Bull gets it's main ingredient from Dejuan Blairs sweat.

    You can call Dejuan Blair a modern day Robin Hood, cause he steals from the rich.

    The government should be checking Dejuan Blairs house cause he's winning the arms race.

    Even Teen Wolf is smart enough stay out of the paint when Dejaun Blairs inside.

    They say history repeats itself but only cause Dejaun Blair allows it.

    When Dejuan Blair was born they had to do a reverse C-section. He was already full grown.

  17. #17
    @Kap10Jack Blackjack's Avatar
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    Dejuan Blair is always willing to lend a helping-hand; yours.

  18. #18
    Chinese Spurs fan Riverwalkman's Avatar
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    I love this Blair Facts collection, and I‘ll translate those facts into chinaspurs.com.

    Come on Samr and all you guys !

  19. #19
    It happens. Samr's Avatar
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    I love this Blair Facts collection, and I‘ll translate those facts into chinaspurs.com.

    Come on Samr and all you guys !
    Dude! I had Panda Express tonight, great timing!

    ... I went to chinaspurs.com and it's all Greek (kinda) to me. Explain? Do you run that place? What do all those lines and dashes mean?

  20. #20
    @Kap10Jack Blackjack's Avatar
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    Cat's only have nine lives because the tenth had already been taken by Blair.

  21. #21
    Pop took his brain back. xellos88330's Avatar
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    DeJuan Blairs arms are so long, he can reach forward and scratch the back of his head.

  22. #22
    Ginobeelee AOMrep's Avatar
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    Dejaun Blair needs a brand new pair of shoes everyday cause his feet eat thier souls.

    Dejuan Blair never needs to wash his hands, germs know better.

    Dejuan Blair has NEVER heard his stomach growl at him!

  23. #23
    No darkness Cry Havoc's Avatar
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    During Spurs practice one day, Popovich saw Blair sitting on the bench while the rest of the team was on the floor. He asked Timmy what "that rookie" thought he was doing, and Duncan said, "Working on his rebounding." "But he's sitting on the bench!" Pop said. "Well, he likes a challenge."

  24. #24
    Chinese Spurs fan Riverwalkman's Avatar
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    Dude! I had Panda Express tonight, great timing!

    ... I went to chinaspurs.com and it's all Greek (kinda) to me. Explain? Do you run that place? What do all those lines and dashes mean?

    I'm in charge of the spurs forum on that site, the posts there are all written in chinese characters.

  25. #25
    It happens. Samr's Avatar
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    During Spurs practice one day, Popovich saw Blair sitting on the bench while the rest of the team was on the floor. He asked Timmy what "that rookie" thought he was doing, and Duncan said, "Working on his rebounding." "But he's sitting on the bench!" Pop said. "Well, he likes a challenge."
    FACT! ... in the morning

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