*** Official 2019-2020 Dallas Cowboys Thread ***

[Millennial_Messiah]

That's a good one. What sucks for these guys is their future contracts are often capped by a ty QB or playcalling.

but on the flip side you have guys who go from great QB situations and godly rookie contract stats and then they get paid top market value to go to a bad team with a bad QB and coach and they get cut halfway through their 2nd year because mgmt wonders why their performance hasn't matched what they paid for

so it evens out I guess

[Spurs Homer]

Cowboys just plain ing suck.

[Darth_Pelican]

Nah, the last 2 are division games. The one thing about Garrett is he tends to bring his "A" game in division games.

whelp, Garrett saves his job with another winning season. 9-7 instead of 8-8, folks.

Have you seen the Eagles lately? They're not just awful, they're on a whole, different level of bad on offense... literally half their offense is out with long term injuries, including their star RT and best 3 WRs.

They're not losing to the ty Eagles. Though I wouldn't be shocked if they rested their starters in week 17 assuming they win next week.

[Spurs Homer]

Praying for garrett to get fired - finally

[Millennial_Messiah]

still going to be great in 8-8

just thought they'd lose to the lambs and win tonight.

[Spurs Homer]

still going to be great in 8-8

just thought they'd lose to the lambs and win tonight.

did i not tell you exactly this last week?

look like world beaters and beat the rams and get everyone's hopes up

only to take a on the field against the hapless eagles

lol

[Fat Brandon Bass]

I'm so tired [Rant]
I’m so tired. I’m tired of going into every game thread and seeing the same god damn thing.
“The Cowboys have the best running back in the league”
“Hot Boyz”
“This our year. Super Bowl baby”
Guess the ety ing what. No they ing won’t. They won’t turn it around. This is the The Dallas Cowboys. There is no happiness here. We will not pull it out. We will leave it in there and the next thing you know you’re 37 years old with seven kids, living in a 250-square-foot singlewide trailer in Mesquite, married to a semi-retired hooker from East Texas, getting blasted on Steel Reserve BECAUSE YOUR DAD NEVER TAUGHT YOU THE OL COITUS INTERRUPTUS.
And dont bring your “Dallas will always be a destination because America’s Team" bull up in here. A DESTINATION DOESN’T INCLUDE TEN SEASONS OF JASON GARRETT BECAUSE YOUR WANNABE ROCK STAR FACE OWNER IS MORE SENILE THAN A ONE HUNDRED YEAR OLD MAN. We are destined to get all these national games every year, at which we’ll get the piss knocked out of us for the entire country to see like Mussolini’s corpse getting put on display in Milan for all of Italy to come take turns beating the out of it.
Ya wanna know what it’s like being a Cowboys fan? It’s like getting ready to have sex with a girl and she slips your out of your pants, starts to blow you, then yanks the zipper up on your pants as hard as she can. And then says she's off to BANG DEZ BRYANT AT HIS MOM’S MANSION IN DESOTO TEXAS BECAUSE HE WAS FORSAKEN BY US.
IT TOOK THE SACRIFICE OF EVERY BIT OF BONE IN TONY ROMO’S BACK TO EVEN MAKE THIS TEAM COMPE IVE.
don’t tell me it’ll get better. don’t tell me how to feel my feelings. I don’t want to hear “Dak’s in the MVP race” from Skip Bayless. And I don’t want to hear ing a ing thing from literally any other fanbase in the league. you. I don’t want to hear about how we don’t have a winning culture. VANILLA ICE WAS NUMBER ONE ON THE BILLBOARD THE LAST TIME WE WON A LE.
One day I’ll die and the misery of being a Cowboys fan will be over. I’ll be walking to take my place in heaven, I’ll walk up to the pearly gates, full of bliss and happiness with all my suffering over, there will be sweet calming music, and then all of a sudden from out of nowhere I’ll hear Terrell Owens say, “I love me some me.”. The music stops, dread fills my stomach, everything turns dark.
Just then, a bright light shows up and Tom Landry appears. I feel the warmth again, everything will be alright. He leans forward as if to tell me something wonderful and whispers almost inaudibly, “Dez Caught It” then kicks me right in the and shoves me off the edge to fall into a silver and blue room with my eyes taped open to watch Jason Garrett go 8-8 every season until the sun expands and engulfs the earth.

[Trainwreck2100]

cooper's home /road split has been this year. How's he expect to get paid

[Millennial_Messiah]

all of you. I need drugs

[Trill Clinton]

Let Cooper walk
Franchise Dak
Pay Byron Jones
Get feelers for Tyron in the market
Draft a ballhawk Safety like they should have done last year
Draft a legit space eating Nose Tackle for once. Not a finesse guy or a bum with no work ethic.
oh and Fire Garrett and the entire coaching staff

[Millennial_Messiah]

Let Cooper walk
Franchise Dak
Pay Byron Jones
Get feelers for Tyron in the market
Draft a ballhawk Safety like they should have done last year
Draft a legit space eating Nose Tackle for once. Not a finesse guy or a bum with no work ethic.
oh and Fire Garrett and the entire coaching staff

franchise and trade dak
let byron walk
get something for cooper

[Mark Celibate]

wouldn't be surprised to see The Bot tank the last game just to avoid going out at 8-8 imo

[SpursforSix]

wouldn't be surprised to see The Bot tank the last game just to avoid going out at 8-8 imo

It wouldn't surprise me if they play the game straight up and still get their asses kicked.

[Spurs Homer]

wow

who woulda thunk that garrett would be hovering around .500 again?

[Spurs Homer]

I'm so tired [Rant]
I’m so tired. I’m tired of going into every game thread and seeing the same god damn thing.
“The Cowboys have the best running back in the league”
“Hot Boyz”
“This our year. Super Bowl baby”
Guess the ety ing what. No they ing won’t. They won’t turn it around. This is the The Dallas Cowboys. There is no happiness here. We will not pull it out. We will leave it in there and the next thing you know you’re 37 years old with seven kids, living in a 250-square-foot singlewide trailer in Mesquite, married to a semi-retired hooker from East Texas, getting blasted on Steel Reserve BECAUSE YOUR DAD NEVER TAUGHT YOU THE OL COITUS INTERRUPTUS.
And dont bring your “Dallas will always be a destination because America’s Team" bull up in here. A DESTINATION DOESN’T INCLUDE TEN SEASONS OF JASON GARRETT BECAUSE YOUR WANNABE ROCK STAR FACE OWNER IS MORE SENILE THAN A ONE HUNDRED YEAR OLD MAN. We are destined to get all these national games every year, at which we’ll get the piss knocked out of us for the entire country to see like Mussolini’s corpse getting put on display in Milan for all of Italy to come take turns beating the out of it.
Ya wanna know what it’s like being a Cowboys fan? It’s like getting ready to have sex with a girl and she slips your out of your pants, starts to blow you, then yanks the zipper up on your pants as hard as she can. And then says she's off to BANG DEZ BRYANT AT HIS MOM’S MANSION IN DESOTO TEXAS BECAUSE HE WAS FORSAKEN BY US.
IT TOOK THE SACRIFICE OF EVERY BIT OF BONE IN TONY ROMO’S BACK TO EVEN MAKE THIS TEAM COMPE IVE.
don’t tell me it’ll get better. don’t tell me how to feel my feelings. I don’t want to hear “Dak’s in the MVP race” from Skip Bayless. And I don’t want to hear ing a ing thing from literally any other fanbase in the league. you. I don’t want to hear about how we don’t have a winning culture. VANILLA ICE WAS NUMBER ONE ON THE BILLBOARD THE LAST TIME WE WON A LE.
One day I’ll die and the misery of being a Cowboys fan will be over. I’ll be walking to take my place in heaven, I’ll walk up to the pearly gates, full of bliss and happiness with all my suffering over, there will be sweet calming music, and then all of a sudden from out of nowhere I’ll hear Terrell Owens say, “I love me some me.”. The music stops, dread fills my stomach, everything turns dark.
Just then, a bright light shows up and Tom Landry appears. I feel the warmth again, everything will be alright. He leans forward as if to tell me something wonderful and whispers almost inaudibly, “Dez Caught It” then kicks me right in the and shoves me off the edge to fall into a silver and blue room with my eyes taped open to watch Jason Garrett go 8-8 every season until the sun expands and engulfs the earth.

not so fast...


god would have included something about Jerruh Jones firing super bowl winning bad ass Jimmy Johnson - immediately -

yet

UNABLE AND UNWILLING to fire .500 Garret!

[Millennial_Messiah]

win and great and 8-8

eagles lose to giants, daniel jones has been playing very well lately

could happen.. stay tuned

[Spurs Homer]

win and great and 8-8

eagles lose to giants, daniel jones has been playing very well lately

could happen.. stay tuned

result of that ^ : garret re-signed

that

rooting for the hated eagles to clinch!

[Millennial_Messiah]

Forever 8-8

[Spurs Homer]

result of that ^ : garret re-signed

that

rooting for the hated eagles to clinch!

[Spurs Homer]

Eagles about to clinch

garrett better be gone tomorrow at the latest!

[Millennial_Messiah]

Jerry Jones: Garrett 8 year extension confirmed.

[SpursforSix]

Eagles about to clinch

garrett better be gone tomorrow at the latest!

Well his contract is over. I don’t think they have to do anything other than not extend him.

[HarlemHeat37]

First team in NFL history to finish .500 or worse with a +100 point differential. They really did a great job beating up ty teams, at least

[Will Hunting]

Well his contract is over. I don’t think they have to do anything other than not extend him.

There was already a headline that he’s not getting brought back ignore they miss the playoffs, he’s done.

[SpursforSix]

There was already a headline that he’s not getting brought back ignore they miss the playoffs, he’s done.

yeah. The last thing I expect Jones to do is to call even more attention to the last 10 wasted years. Imo, Jones has already ed up the next era majorly by tying themselves to Zeke.