Dear Diary,
Oh friend, what a terrible 4th of July weekend I've had. I'm finally able to talk to you about it. But as of now, no one in the family is talking to each other.
Things started off great. Stan came over with his Foreman grill. Les brought hers as well with lots of burgers and hot dogs. She also brought a case of beer and some wine coolers.
The good book says that alcohol is the devil's tears and he laughs when you drink them. Amen to that.
All the boys started drinking around 10 IN THE MORNING. Normally, we don't let Mason drink but Stan said it would be OK for this special occasion. Well by 11, they were all drunk. Larry, Stan, Mason, and Chris.
Things got bad really quick. Larry put in his VCR tape of Barney so the blessings could have something to do. But Mason wanted to watch Shaft which Stan had brought over. They all started cussing at each other.
I sent the blessings to hang out in Mason's room. Me and Les started grilling the hotdogs but when I asked who was hungry, Chris said, "no one you stupid ". About that time, Big blessing came out of Mason's room with his
ball game. But she had it wrapped around her head. And for some reason Les got really angry. She threw the game at Mason and then stormed off with the girls. She didn't even tell Chris who was in the bathroom.
So now Chris is super mad and says (forgive my language) " it". And then he plops down on the couch and starts injecting something into his arm.
It was too much for me so I had a couple of wine coolers and then went back and tried to make peace. So I asked Larry what he wanted for his birth day. And forgive me for the following...but here's where things started to get really bad.
Me: So Larry, what do you want for your birthday?
Chris: He wants a couple of 5th graders and some Astro Glide.
Larry : you Chris. You're a goddamned druggie.
Stan: Hey Larry, know what I'm going to do for your birthday?
Larry: What's that Stan
Stan: I'm gonna your son in the ass
Larry: you stan
Then Mason starts laughing and puts his toy around his head and starts chewing on the ball part and making grunts.
At that point, I went back and had some more wine coolers while they all kept shouting at each other.
The next thing I remember is waking up naked on the couch by Chris. I don't feel very good so I go to the bathroom and there's Mason and Stan taking a shower TOGETHER while Larry is passed out on the toilet.
I want back to the bedroom and fell asleep. When I woke, everyone was gone.
I'm praying hard for guidance. I don't understand what's happening.