Too nervous to give good presentations

[rascal]

I got too nervous giving presentations in high school and college.

Really could not look at the audience while speaking so just read off a paper looking down. Really did poorly, with a dry mouth and rushing it to get it over.

I even took a D in an English semester and an F in the presentation by avoiding it and not doing a presentation in High School.

Anyone else struggle with this while in High School/ college?

[KobesAchilles]

You just practice like anything else. Important to remember two things. First, nobody has any idea what you're going to say so even if you know you messed up, the audience typically has no idea so keep calm. And the second thing is that today most people zone out after 10 seconds anyways and check their phones so it's not like anybody will be paying attention for the most part. Really calms the nerves when you realize that as long as you aren't spazzing out with your arms or cussing to yourself like a weirdo when you mess up, nobody will judge you harshly.

[rascal]

Most of the time the others are not paying attention to the one giving the presentation. They are worrying about their own presentation especially if you first or second and get it over with .

I felt by being nervous it brought more attention on myself and I wanted the opposite.

[Thread]

Look at the tops of their heads, or, fuzz your vision as you present your work. And always end your with a vow...Mine? "I look forward to the challenge with equal amounts of both anticipation and determination. Thank you."

[DeadlyDynasty]

Give the audience visual cues or handouts so the attention is not on you or how you are speaking. Another thing I like to do is engage the audience with questions. Let them be an active participant. Not only does it take the pressure and spotlight off of you, but it inadvertently puts the pressure on them, thus making you appear like more of an authority figure on whatever subject you're teaching/presenting

[DJR210]

Are you just reminiscing on your HS days, or is this something you're doing now/in the future?

[Mark Celibate]

This sounds more like a phobia than needing actual help, which there's a difference. I knew people with a) before and some have overcome it, while some will avoid presentations to this day. If you just want to be a mediocre f@g, who will never advance in life because he's too scared then you can just keep avoiding them. Otherwise, listen below.

If you have a phobia, the best thing to do, IMO, is exposure therapy. I.e. start out presenting to three or four trusted friends or family in order to associate presenting with a successful outcome. Then maybe increase the number to eight or so. Then you should feel a lot better. If it's really THAT bad, then medication may be the way to go for the first 1 or 2. Or maybe just find a way to get pi$$ed off when you get really nervous. Your body can't be nervous and angry at the same time. You know the ol, cliche football coach saying "It's better to get pissed off then pissed on"

Presenting was never my thing until I got a job where I was giving 2-3 presentations a week. By brute force, it knocked all the fear out and now I love doing them. I realized there's no way I could ever present my ideas in a meaningful way to a large group unless I did them. Ironically though, it's much easier as an adult than it is in High School/College. When you're an adult, chances are you're presenting to a mature audience that is actually interested in what you have to say. In High School/College, you're likely doing it because it's required, your topic is already something f@ggy that your teacher came up with, and half of your audience is a bunch of class clowns who just want to f*ck with you. Another tip to combat the nerves is to take a speech class at the earliest time slot, like 8 am. Adrenaline usually builds up during the day and you are probably your calmest first thing in the morning. Plus, your fellow students are likely still half asleep so you just get it over with real quick without anybody really caring

[lefty]

Your audience won't judge you or analyze your every move

And you can tell yourself most people may not be listening, I know I tend to drift away during presentations lol

[Tyronn Lue]

I present a lot. It's about being prepared, understanding the subject matter and not hearing your own voice. The last one is the hardest. You know how you feel when someone is presenting you just want it over, and so you might hear your inner voice say "just draw it to a close, shut up already". Make your presentation clear and concise. Don't read your presentation, they can read. Instead just touch on each point and expound some. Allow time for questions between subjects but don't get bogged down in conversation so that your time allotment gets taken.

[Thread]

I present a lot. It's about being prepared, understanding the subject matter and not hearing your own voice. The last one is the hardest. You know how you feel when someone is presenting you just want it over, and so you might hear your inner voice say "just draw it to a close, shut up already". Make your presentation clear and concise. Don't read your presentation, they can read. Instead just touch on each point and expound some. Allow time for questions between subjects but don't get bogged down in conversation so that your time allotment gets taken.

& yet another cogent post by Lue.

Lue

[Mark Celibate]

I present a lot. It's about being prepared, understanding the subject matter and not hearing your own voice. The last one is the hardest. You know how you feel when someone is presenting you just want it over, and so you might hear your inner voice say "just draw it to a close, shut up already". Make your presentation clear and concise. Don't read your presentation, they can read. Instead just touch on each point and expound some. Allow time for questions between subjects but don't get bogged down in conversation so that your time allotment gets taken.

That's one that took me a few years to get better at. Pausing for questions at regular intervals. Even when I go slow and make an effort not to rush, it's something I always have to tell myself...pause intermediately and interact again with the audience to make sure nobody is holding the glock to their head, ready to blow their brains out because I'm boring them to death tbh

[Thread]

That's one that took me a few years to get better at. Pausing for questions at regular intervals. Even when I go slow and make an effort not to rush, it's something I always have to tell myself...pause intermediately and interact again with the audience to make sure nobody is holding the glock to their head, ready to blow their brains out because I'm boring them to death tbh

Okay, I put it back down.

[FrostKing]

It ultimately came down to how confident I was in the material/points I was explaining. If I wasn't then I would get nervous and in my head.

But playing sports taught me to keep my heart beat down. Standing at the free throw line.

[FrostKing]

Pitchers like John Smoltz in 1996 had his trainer sit in the stands with a red shirt on. When he got rattled he'd zone in on that shirt and calm himself.

Id pick an item in the room and stare at it if you feel yourself getting rattled. Deep breaths. No one cares if you pause or make mistake they just don't want to see train wreck.

[FrostKing]

Speech at my Best Friends wedding was super nervous. I just made a few main points and spoke the rest from my heart. You either believe what you are saying or not.

I killed it. I brought a bar stool up, buddy jokingly mentioned it minutes before I went up. Then walked around sharing stories pointing at people and taking pauses.


Remember only you know how your speech was "supposed" to go. They are an audience. Often the best isn't robotic and natural. Take deep breath. Laugh at the situation. And go

[Blake]

It's like any time you're putting yourself out there in new territory, like speeches, interviews, presentations, pitches.... The more prepared you are and the more you do, it gets easier and easier to step out of that comfort zone that a lot of people settle into.

[Thread]

It's like any time you're putting yourself out there in new territory, like speeches, interviews, presentations, pitches.... The more prepared you are and the more you do, it gets easier and easier to step out of that comfort zone that a lot of people settle into.

...or, just put 'em on Ignore.

tee, hee.

[rascal]

Lots of good points here.

HS/College was a long time ago so this is for those who have to go through presentations now at school or work. If you get good at presentations this will give you confidence in other areas of your life.

I would never take a job where there were presentations so avoided it at all costs.

Yes there were costs as the guys who gave presentations usually made more money as they were in more leadership roles.

[pgardn]

Lots of good points here.

HS/College was a long time ago so this is for those who have to go through presentations now at school or work. If you get good at presentations this will give you confidence in other areas of your life.

I would never take a job where there were presentations so avoided it at all costs.

Yes there were costs as the guys who gave presentations usually made more money as they were in more leadership roles.

If you really like what you are doing and excited about the subject it really helps.
Which is why I don’t understand taking a job you hate. Once you reach the realization that you might be in a specific area for the rest of your life.
If the money is not great, adjust your lifestyle. If Sunday night you are looking forward to Monday morning… you are very fortunate. Working and actually accomplishing something that you deem important is deeply satisfying Imo.

[Mark Celibate]

If you really like what you are doing and excited about the subject it really helps.
Which is why I don’t understand taking a job you hate. Once you reach the realization that you might be in a specific area for the rest of your life.
If the money is not great, adjust your lifestyle. If Sunday night you are looking forward to Monday morning… you are very fortunate. Working and actually accomplishing something that you deem important is deeply satisfying Imo.

Absolutely, fortunate to love what I do everyday and been that way the last 5 years. First few years in my career were absolutely brutal though trying to learn everything and git gud, and yes, a lot of that was having to learn to present well too. Point is, anything worth having means you have to suck it up and do uncomfortable sh!t for awhile until you master it, [insert similar motivational quote here], etc etc etc

I used to think you'd never get a good job if you avoided presentations but I know with the rise of remote work and other ways you can make money online, I concede that it is changing. Those that are heavily introverted can still carve out decent careers without having to do it or even work with people directly if they specialize in some kind of STEM field and work remote. Some are ok just living that life but if you want to keep climbing the ladder (usually those with kids), there's still really no avoiding presenting in some kind of way, shape, or form even if it's all done through web conferencing or something.

In fact, if you are in STEM, I wouldn't get too comfortable with not having to present eventually in this day and age. The programming monkey jobs are just going to be given to Indians as they generally have terrible social skills, so soft skills are kinda necessary to set you apart from them anyway. Even though everyone knows their work is usually horrible, companies still love the cheap labor

[Tyronn Lue]

Absolutely, fortunate to love what I do everyday and been that way the last 5 years. First few years in my career were absolutely brutal though trying to learn everything and git gud, and yes, a lot of that was having to learn to present well too. Point is, anything worth having means you have to suck it up and do uncomfortable sh!t for awhile until you master it, [insert similar motivational quote here], etc etc etc

I used to think you'd never get a good job if you avoided presentations but I know with the rise of remote work and other ways you can make money online, I concede that it is changing. Those that are heavily introverted can still carve out decent careers without having to do it or even work with people directly if they specialize in some kind of STEM field and work remote. Some are ok just living that life but if you want to keep climbing the ladder (usually those with kids), there's still really no avoiding presenting in some kind of way, shape, or form even if it's all done through web conferencing or something.

In fact, if you are in STEM, I wouldn't get too comfortable with not having to present eventually in this day and age. The programming monkey jobs are just going to be given to Indians as they generally have terrible social skills, so soft skills are kinda necessary to set you apart from them anyway. Even though everyone knows their work is usually horrible, companies still love the cheap labor

I know several Indian professionals and the majority are great at presenting. I do laugh though that often the others feel they need to talk at some point even if they aren't experts in that field and have nothing valuable to add. Maybe it's a custom to say something, not sure. I think practice is almost required to be good at presenting, and I don't mean practicing during your actual presentations. The problem I have is that often a presentation is spur of the moment, based on my boss needing me to join a meeting to show something to someone in another department or a potential customer. Then you just need a canned offering while being prepared to answer questions in a way that shows you're not bull ting (usually by saying you don't have that information in front of you but you'll get it to them ASAP).

[FrostKing]

Lots of good points here.

HS/College was a long time ago so this is for those who have to go through presentations now at school or work. If you get good at presentations this will give you confidence in other areas of your life.

I would never take a job where there were presentations so avoided it at all costs.

Yes there were costs as the guys who gave presentations usually made more money as they were in more leadership roles.

Were you working in Marketing or Entertainment?

Look at it this way. Yes there are great leaders & mentors that only do it 1 on 1 and privately BUT vast majority that's a requirement. You need to be able to walk into new, uncomfortable and even hostile setting and be the rock that people dependent on. Not talking heroes here just consistent and unfazed. This is my strength. I'm a modest but classy guy that can chameleon anytime anywhere. People want me in their bunker.

But majority of roles in our society - public speaking is increasingly losing value. Interactions are made thru a screen or even messages.

There are many factors that equal a good public speaker. Extrovert but also able to prioritize main points and selling in to the idea/argument.

[FrostKing]

Vast majority of people I've heard are just okay. And that's fine. Unless you get paid to be on stage then you aren't expected to win over a room.

[Tyronn Lue]

the internet is full of gods

[spurraider21]

this isnt that uncommon, and theres no one bandaid.

- usually gets better with practice or repe ion. its very normal to have nerves the first few times you do public speaking type stuff. i remember sweating bullets in my first court appearance even though nothing consequential was happening and it was basically just the judge assigning a trial date.

- it also helps to be very prepared. know the subject matter inside and out, even more so than what your presentation actually covers. you want to be comfortable with the subject matter and not just memorizing a canned speech word for word. you never want to be reading a script. at best you have bullet points to remind you of the topics and keep you in sequence, but you should have enough mastery over the material that you can basically just be riffing and get across what you want. the more confident you are in your competence of the subject matter, the easier it becomes to speak about it, since you are speaking from knowledge and not just memorization.

- its kinda useless to tell somebody to "be confident" because its not as easy as just saying it and then doing it. but try to remember that you are definitely scrutinizing yourself waaaay more than the audience, including stuff like "am i breating a little loud" or "my hand placement kind of feels awkward, i hope it looks normal." nobody is thinking of that .

- practice is important because you want to knock off any filler words such as "umm, like" as much as you can. and for me, that takes practice. i have a knack of always trying to fill space. i always get nervous when i pause because of concern if comes off as an awkward silence. that also leads to me talking to fast. i have to regularly train and coach myself to slow down and be ok with taking a deep breath and pause. pausing for 5-10 seconds between points is totally fine, and it might seem like an awkward eternity from your position, but for the audience it could actually be a nice little break to allow them to fully digest what they heard in your previous point