Tooth Fairy prospering

[cantthinkofanything]

What the hell? Many of my daughter's friends get $20 per tooth from the Tooth Fairy. Why not just give them the damn money outright instead of tying it to the Tooth Fairy and making all the other parents look like cheapskates. It's even worse when they still believe in the Tooth Fairy because then the child freaks out when her friend gets $20 and she gets $1. Now they get some complex about their teeth not being as good. WTF people. How about just putting the $400 in a savings account for them when they are born and sticking with the $1 per tooth. By raising the bar to $20 per tooth, you're essentially sending billions to China for crappy toys that will be in a garage sale in a year or so.

[Frenzy]

In the end our teeth is all we are going to have. You should save them.

[desflood]

My kids get $.25 per tooth.

[I. Hustle]

In the future teeth will be used as currency. A childs tooth will go for $25 USD where as an Adults will fetch upwards of $50. The message has already been sent out in rap music subliminally and those "grill's" those rappers wear are kind of like armor for your teeth.
I played my Paul Wall records backward to find out that he is leading the movement. That is why I started raiding dentists offices and set up a storage place for all the teeth I have collected so far. Once the dollar has no value and the tooth is the new currency I will be one of if not the richest person in the U.S.

[Tinystarz]

In the end our teeth is all we are going to have. You should save them.

People would be stupid not to :toast

[mrsmaalox]

The toothfairy at our house was really lame and always forgot to stop by. So I used to make up for him by "treating" them to a new cartoon toothbrush and sparkle toothpaste; my poor kids were either too embarrassed or just didn't care about it enough to discuss what their friends' toothfairies brought.

[cantthinkofanything]

The toothfairy at our house was really lame and always forgot to stop by. So I used to make up for him by "treating" them to a new cartoon toothbrush and sparkle toothbrush; my poor kids were either too embarrassed or just didn't care about it enough to discuss what their friends' toothfairies brought.

Well, I guess we're all lucky there's no such thing as a toenail clippings fairy.

[Monostradamus]

In the future teeth will be used as currency. A childs tooth will go for $25 USD where as an Adults will fetch upwards of $50. The message has already been sent out in rap music subliminally and those "grill's" those rappers wear are kind of like armor for your teeth.
I played my Paul Wall records backward to find out that he is leading the movement. That is why I started raiding dentists offices and set up a storage place for all the teeth I have collected so far. Once the dollar has no value and the tooth is the new currency I will be one of if not the richest person in the U.S.

.........ok

[DUNCANownsKOBE]

My kids get $.25 per tooth.
:lol cheap

In the future teeth will be used as currency. A childs tooth will go for $25 USD where as an Adults will fetch upwards of $50. The message has already been sent out in rap music subliminally and those "grill's" those rappers wear are kind of like armor for your teeth.
I played my Paul Wall records backward to find out that he is leading the movement. That is why I started raiding dentists offices and set up a storage place for all the teeth I have collected so far. Once the dollar has no value and the tooth is the new currency I will be one of if not the richest person in the U.S.
:lol not funny

[DUNCANownsKOBE]

.........ok
lol unintentionally scoffing a fellow lefty crew member

[mrsmaalox]

Well, I guess we're all lucky there's no such thing as a toenail clippings fairy.

Well judging from some of the parents I have met, I wouldn't be surprised....

My kids would just be like "Oh great, the toenail fairy came and left me some Odor Eaters" :lol

But they are used to that because I've never been into those fairy tale things. I wanted to impart some practicality so they always got toothbrushes in Easter Baskets and Valentines, rolls of scotch tape in Christmas stockings (so they'd leave mine alone), and writing materials for everything else. They laugh about it now :lol

[cantthinkofanything]

Well judging from some of the parents I have met, I wouldn't be surprised....

My kids would just be like "Oh great, the toenail fairy came and left me some Odor Eaters" :lol

But they are used to that because I've never been into those fairy tale things. I wanted to impart some practicality so they always got toothbrushes in Easter Baskets and Valentines, rolls of scotch tape in Christmas stockings (so they'd leave mine alone), and writing materials for everything else. They laugh about it now :lol

What????? I don't get the rolls of scotch tape thing. I would think if they got scotch tape, they would then check your stocking to see if maybe you got the good stuff.

I guess I would ask if you weren't into the fairy tale things, why did you bother with the Easter Basket and Christmas stockings?

[Drachen]

Well judging from some of the parents I have met, I wouldn't be surprised....

My kids would just be like "Oh great, the toenail fairy came and left me some Odor Eaters" :lol

But they are used to that because I've never been into those fairy tale things. I wanted to impart some practicality so they always got toothbrushes in Easter Baskets and Valentines, rolls of scotch tape in Christmas stockings (so they'd leave mine alone), and writing materials for everything else. They laugh about it now :lol

My mom was a dental hygienist, so yeah, we got toothbrushes for christmas/easter/halloween/etc. My kids get the same thing from my mom.

Oh and to the OP. I told my wife that we won't go over $1. (the first ones will likely be 50 cents or so.

[mrsmaalox]

What????? I don't get the rolls of scotch tape thing. I would think if they got scotch tape, they would then check your stocking to see if maybe you got the good stuff.

I guess I would ask if you weren't into the fairy tale things, why did you bother with the Easter Basket and Christmas stockings?

Well, they were into it! So I played along for them.

Oh and scotch tape, toothbrushes, etc. isn't all they got, just a little practical thing I'd include ;)

[Ed Lover]

In the future teeth will be used as currency. A childs tooth will go for $25 USD where as an Adults will fetch upwards of $50. The message has already been sent out in rap music subliminally and those "grill's" those rappers wear are kind of like armor for your teeth.
I played my Paul Wall records backward to find out that he is leading the movement. That is why I started raiding dentists offices and set up a storage place for all the teeth I have collected so far. Once the dollar has no value and the tooth is the new currency I will be one of if not the richest person in the U.S.

C'mon son

what the fuck is you talking about?

What could you have been doing at work instead of writing this bullshit?

thefuckouttahere

[I. Hustle]

C'mon son

what the fuck is you talking about?

What could you have been doing at work instead of writing this bullshit?

thefuckouttahere

Still not tired of that C'mon son schtick huh?

[Monostradamus]

lol unintentionally scoffing a fellow lefty crew member

He's not in LC. If he is, then he's out. We can't handle that kind of unadulterated idiocy.

[I. Hustle]

He's not in LC. If he is, then he's out. We can't handle that kind of unadulterated idiocy.

lol @ not recognizing trolls.

[Ed Lover]

Still not tired of that C'mon son schtick huh?

Still not tired of stealing your employer's money while posting unfunny takes, huh son?


C'mon Son

[SourCandy]

C'mon son

what the fuck is you talking about?

What could you have been doing at work instead of writing this bullshit?

thefuckouttahere

I thought it was "boooolshiiit

[I. Hustle]

Still not tired of stealing your employer's money while posting unfunny takes, huh son?


C'mon Son


Beats being stuck at home posting under a tired ass troll. Unless you are at work too and just being hypocritical.

[Ed Lover]

I thought it was "boooolshiiit

sup girl?

I'd be happy to explain the different uses over dinner sometime, son

hit me up

[Ed Lover]

Beats being stuck at home posting under a tired ass troll. Unless you are at work too and just being hypocritical.

C'mon son

I'm hittin you in a weak spot and you know it

Every time you're about to post an unfunny joke or a shitty take, I want you to:

1.stop

2.think (I know, this is the hard part for you, son)

3.Resist the urge to eat something fried or made of chocolate

4.Do something work related or take a walk

With this simple 4-step program son, you'll be on your way to being a more productive, healthy worker

I'm here to help a nigga out, son.

For real

[DUNCANownsKOBE]

:lmao

[I. Hustle]

C'mon son

I'm hittin you in a weak spot and you know it

Every time you're about to post an unfunny joke or a shitty take, I want you to:

1.stop

2.think (I know, this is the hard part for you, son)

3.Resist the urge to eat something fried or made of chocolate

4.Do something work related or take a walk

With this simple 4-step program son, you'll be on your way to being a more productive, healthy worker

I'm here to help a nigga out, son.

For real


:lol so which is it? At your mommy's house or at work?

[Blake]

I'm no I Hustle story teller, but this is the truth, tbh:

my kid's tooth fell out without warning right before she went to bed. All I had on me was a 10 spot. But that's not the bestest part.

After she fell asleep, I remembered to grab the tooth out from under her pillow but I got sidetracked and set it down on a ledge in the hallway.

In the morning I heard crying and thought "wtf? she's crying about getting $10? That's not like her.... I wonder if the bill dropped down under the bed or something."

I came out, saw her holding the tooth. Fuck me.

"uh, yeah, I found that on the carpet early this morning before you got up. Apparently the TF dropped it on the way up the chimney."

":cry but the tf needs it. how else will my baby cousin get the new tooth? :cry"

I told her the tf recycles and gives them to little rugrat relatives.

"k, put the tooth back under the pillow and he/she will come back."

"So I get paid morrre? yes!"

"What? you already got 10 bucks.......which was 8 bucks more than the last time you had a tooth come out. The tf isn't going to pay twice for the same [fucking] tooth."

":( Then I'll just keep it then.....and why did I get ten dollars this time and only 2 dollars last time?"

"k fine, let me google what happens if you stick a lost tooth back under......and you got ten for giving him/her a larger baby tooth than normal. They weigh teeth like bananas at the store. That's how they know how much to give."

Ended up being a $12 tooth. Fairy tales suck.

[ALVAREZ6]

What the hell? Many of my daughter's friends get $20 per tooth from the Tooth Fairy. Why not just give them the damn money outright instead of tying it to the Tooth Fairy and making all the other parents look like cheapskates. It's even worse when they still believe in the Tooth Fairy because then the child freaks out when her friend gets $20 and she gets $1. Now they get some complex about their teeth not being as good. WTF people. How about just putting the $400 in a savings account for them when they are born and sticking with the $1 per tooth. By raising the bar to $20 per tooth, you're essentially sending billions to China for crappy toys that will be in a garage sale in a year or so.

crofl wouldn't have guessed you have a kid(s)

[cantthinkofanything]

crofl wouldn't have guessed you have a kid(s)

I've very careful to keep my personalities separate.

[ALVAREZ6]

I've very careful to keep my personalities separate.

Good. How many personalities do you have? I have 4.

[cantthinkofanything]

Good. How many personalities do you have? I have 4.

only 3

[DMC]

lol you wouldn't believe what my friend's little boy did last week, it was so cute....































































































He died.






















































































































Not really.