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That's crazy. I hope she doesn't lose faith in God because of the way those people are acting. Always keep your eyes on God, not man.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080601/...PpnzbegkWs0NUE
Minn. mom fights church ban on her autistic son By DAVE KOLPACK, Associated Press Writer
BERTHA, Minn. - Carol Race thinks it's important for her 13-year-old son to be in church on Sundays for Catholic Mass.
Leaders of the Church of St. Joseph once felt the same way, but not anymore. They say Race's autistic son Adam is disruptive and his erratic behavior threatens the safety of other parishioners.
The northern Minnesota church has obtained a restraining order to keep Adam away, an action that has been deeply hurtful to the Race family and has brought them support from parents of other autistic children.
"My son is not dangerous," Carol Race said. The church's action is "about a certain community's fears of him. Fears of danger versus actual danger," she said.
In court papers, church leaders say the danger is real. The Rev. Daniel Walz wrote in his pe ion for the restraining order that Adam — who already is more than 6 feet tall and weighs more than 225 pounds — has hit a child, has nearly knocked over elderly parishioners while bolting from his pew, has spit at people and has urinated in the church.
"His behavior at Mass is extremely disruptive and dangerous," wrote Walz. "Adam is 13 and growing, so his behaviors grow increasingly difficult for his parents to manage."
Carol Race said Walz's claims are exaggerated.
"He's never actually injured anyone," she said. "He's never knocked down anyone. He's never urinated on anyone or spit on anyone."
Carol Race was cited for attending church May 11 in violation of the restraining order, and faces a hearing Monday. She says she can't afford a lawyer and will defend herself in court. A lay mediator is scheduled to meet with her and church board members on Wednesday.
Autism is a developmental disorder that affects a person's ability to communicate and interact with others. It is more severe in some people than others. Adam has limited verbal skills.
Walz did not return calls seeking comment, but Jane Marrin, who works for the Diocese of St. Cloud and is acting as a spokeswoman for the parish, said the church board tried working with the Races to find "reasonable accommodations." That included offering a video feed of Mass that could be watched in the church basement.
The family refused all suggestions, she said.
"It's a difficult issue," Marrin said. "There are no easy answers."
Carol Race dismissed the church's suggestion that Adam watch a video feed in the church basement, saying that "does not have the same status as attending Mass. Otherwise we could all just sit home and watch it on TV and not bother to come in."
"It's considered a sin in the Catholic church not to attend Mass on Sundays and every holy day of obligation," she said. "And that's what this is about. I'm just trying to fulfill my obligations."
Adam is one of five children. The family's home in nearby Eagle Bend has separate study rooms so the other children can read books and use crayons that Adam could otherwise destroy.
Carol said Adam has two favorite spots in the house, the prayer room and the kitchen table. "He likes to eat," she said, laughing.
Adam is prone to anxiety attacks. Carol said some of those outbursts force members of the family to sit on him to calm him down, or restrain his hands and feet with a strip of felt.
In his court pe ion, Walz said that after one service Adam got into another family's car, started it and revved up the engine while there were people in front of the vehicle.
"Adam's continued presence on parish grounds not only endangers the parishioners, it is disruptive to the devout celebration of the Eucharist," Walz wrote. "I have repeatedly asked John and Carol to keep Adam from church; they have refused to do so.
"In fact, Carol told our parish council that she would have to be dragged from church in handcuffs if I tried to keep Adam from attending Mass," he wrote.
The Races have received support from other parents, including Chris and Libby Rupp, who brought their autistic daughter from St. Paul on Memorial Day weekend and sat in the church's back pew normally occupied by the Races.
"I think this case is mostly about not understanding autism," Libby Rupp said. "I wanted to show them another example. Ultimately, we just need more people to truly understand autism."
Rupp met the Races and said she could see why some people might be uncomfortable around Adam, but she added: "Never at one point did I feel that anyone was in danger."
That's crazy. I hope she doesn't lose faith in God because of the way those people are acting. Always keep your eyes on God, not man.
Dude sounds huge and re s are abnormally strong. Recipe for disaster?
religion is a business.
"We reserve the right to withhold everything that is holy and spread fear when politically necessary".
Hmmm. Hard to not have sympathy for this family. Caring for their autistic kid obviously takes up a ton of time and energy.
On the other hand, I can see why the church can't have this kid running around during services.
Perhaps there is some other way?
they got a restraining order, dip .
I guess there's only one Catholic church in Bertha, Minnesota?
This mom sounds like a real piece of work. The church says he peed in the church......mom says he didn't.......I tend to believe the party holding the restraining order.
You can plead "misunderstood" all you want, but if your gigantic autistic kid is endangering other parishoners (whether you want to believe that or not), you have a moral duty to keep safety your main concern.
I thought this story was sad because this woman must be about stretched to her limit caring for a child like this. And it's probably her faith in God that has gotten her this far. This may just be the thing that pushes her into the deep end. And then the one who suffers the most will be the kid.
I'm not sure this is really a church issue. If these were political events, or PTA meetings, or Boy Scouts, I'm sure the organizers would say the same thing -- madam, we're afraid we're going to have to ask you to leave. Your son is being disruptive. Etc.
But this woman is committed to her faith. Good for her. But are there not ways for her to worship and have the Mass without bringing this autistic kid into it?
Excellent observation! Yes, I know quite a few parents of autistic and otherwise disabled kids who have made it precisely because of their faith. I'm not sure that the poor decision of a church would necessarily "push her over the edge," but it's possible. On the other hand, can not the church be both compassionate toward the family and committed to a safe and worshipful experience in church?
This is actually pretty simple.
If the kid is really 225 lbs and knocking people over and urinating in the church, then sorry but Mom is being irresponsible.
And my bias is, I don't know why a church would make that up.
They could maybe set aside an area where the kid could be taken if he is getting ansy but somewhere he could still see the service from- like the rooms many churches set aside for mothers to nurse their babies.
This kid does sound like an awful lot to handle so I understand the church's concern.
They have to look out for everyone's safety.
Wonder what Tim Duncan thinks of this...
And another option, a pastor or someone from the church could meet with the family at their home weekly or bimonthly.
That way the family could be instructed in the Bible and encouraged by the fellowship in a confined area where the kid likely feels most comfortable and is least likely to act out.
Also,that would ensure that other church attendees get to worship in peace and safety.
So, can the autistic handle taking valium?
Wwjd?
That sounds like the perfect solution to me.
Angel, this is an excellent idea. A lot of churches don't seem to harbor that spirit of "reaching out" in these days, however. I wonder why?
You dont need to go to church to be religious, Im sure God will understand. If the kid did those things then he shouldnt be there.
or, if they feel like they absolutely have to go to the church, then sit in the basement and watch the telecast like the church requested.
Maybe they just need to issue shoulder pads to the old ladies.
Yea or gag the kid and wheel him in, in 4pt restraints!!!sorry.
with technology being what it is, I don't see why the church needs to make a special exception for this kid.
Being in the actual building should be far down the list of priorities as far as what you should get out of the Sunday sermon.
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