ing Juggalo for life! i used to do security for ICP.
A lot of people have photos taken of their babies when they die at birth or shortly thereafter. It's the only picture they'll have as a reminder. There are websites dedicated specifically to babies that have died at birth or of SIDS, etc. But this seems to step over the line of good taste and decorum.
If this helps this young couple grieve and cope with the death of their baby, then so be it.
Having the baby on myspace is WTF.
But the as far as the funeral goes, there is nothing wrong with that.
I understand why some people may think it's weird or should be kept private.
But sharing these pics with their friends and family, and physically/forcibly reminding them that this little girl existed and was loved can be really important to the parents. A loss of that magnitude is difficult to understand if you've never been there or had someone go through it. It's hard because people don't know what to say and quickly forget or act as if the child never existed. Having and showing that proof of the baby -- that can be so important in keeping the parents sane. Further - it's the only thing they have of their daughter. That picture is all they have. They don't have toys or blankets, they can't hold her one more time - they can only look at her.
Let them have that.
Jesus Christ.
Very sad to lose a child.
Did anyone else think the casket was an "igloo cooler" at first glance???
I was talking to fatsack about this at dinner tonight and asked him "If X and Y had lost a baby and posted about it on their parenting blog, would we have thought it was weird?" No, we would have looked at it as their way of grieving and coping. Young people have MySpace to express themselves on, so it's perfectly normal for them to do so. I hope they can find a community, whether it be online or in their city, where they can come together with other parents who have lost babies.
On a side note: there are photographers who offer their services to families of stillborn children pro bono. They take photographs just as if that baby was alive...parents cradling their baby, kissing their forehead, counting their toes. It may seen macabre to those who don't understand the loss they are feeling, but to them, it's their way of saying "my baby existed, if only for a brief moment." My grandmother had a sibling who died at childbirth and she said the only picture they had of him was in the coffin at the cemetary.
That's very sad. I think they are displaying a combination of possible mental health issues, limited intelligence/education and an extreme grief reaction. They are probably coping the best way they know how. And I know it's weird, but I remember pics of family members in coffins on display at the homes of some elderly relatives in the hills of Kentucky. And many years later, I saw the same thing at some in-laws homes in extremely rural Illinois. Could be a cultural i.e "hillbilly" (my relatives) thing.
Yeah, I feel bad for the parents. I don't know how I'd feel -- I've never lost a kid -- but I imagine losing one makes you do things that seem silly or illogical to the rest of us.
As my grandmother used to say "there but for the grace of God go I." I've never experienced the loss of a baby, but I cannot for a moment fathom what it must feel like.
When my daughter passed away, the nurses gave me a beautiful little box with many mementos in it. It has 2 photos, foot prints and hand prints, and her baby blanket. Also had a lovely sympathy card from my doctor and probably other things I can't think of. It's strange that I couldn't even bear to look at the box for a couple of weeks, then I clung to it for a couple of weeks, and then I put it away and I haven't been able to touch it since.
I didn't know, my heart goes out to you.
My brother died when he was 27, AIDS. I remember my mother saying that it doesn't matter that he was a grown man, it was still her baby boy that died. Then when my mother died, I thought to myself "I don't have a mommy anymore" even though I was 30 at the time, married and on my own. She was still my mommy, the one who kissed boo-boos and knew just exactly how to make my PBJ sandwiches!
What's the difference between that (myspace pistures) and going up to an open casket at a funeral?
You're taking a look at the dead in both instances...
As far as the way they're dressed, that's their own opinion. I've never understood the concept of having to dress a certain way to show "respect". Look at lawyers. They wear expensive suits, shoes etc and yet most of them are nothing but pricks. Love and respect comes from within. Maybe they loved their kid more than a parent who dressed "formally" for their kid's funeral.
Last edited by Ronaldo McDonald; 06-06-2008 at 12:33 AM.
that is too much.
Dayum Sunshine & Mrs. Maalox! You would never know it in this message board the pain & anguish you both have gone through. My deep heart sympathies, to the both of you. Mrs. M, loosing an infant is so devastating, I can't even imagine. I weep just thinking about it. Sunshine, loosing your Mother, is so painful for a daughter, I know. I wish all of us could step back for one moment, and realize that we all have loss, heartache, pain, and sorrow. So, even though we laugh through our pain, we must step back, and aknowledge some of us with pain, are a little fresher and sharper in it, at this time. Kind words, are the music of the world.
Umm....at least they didn't bring the dead kid home to meet the rest of the family...
Washinton PostIn his Senate office, on a shelf next to an autographed baseball, Sen. Rick Santorum keeps a framed photo of his son Gabriel Michael, the fourth of his seven children. Named for two archangels, Gabriel Michael was born prematurely, at 20 weeks, on Oct. 11, 1996, and lived two hours outside the womb.
Upon their son's death, Rick and Karen Santorum opted not to bring his body to a funeral home. Instead, they bundled him in a blanket and drove him to Karen's parents' home in Pittsburgh. There, they spent several hours kissing and cuddling Gabriel with his three siblings, ages 6, 4 and 1 1/2. They took photos, sang lullabies in his ear and held a private Mass.
I dunno, I can't image what they are going threw and I never want to. If something happen to my daughter I have no reason to live and I would make sure I don't go on, she is my life just me and her since she was 4 months she 6 now. My mom helps allot tho, like while I am work she picks her up from school and stuff.
There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)
Posting Permissions
Reply With Quote
