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  1. #1
    Homer 2centsworth's Avatar
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    Looking for everyones two cents on this one.

    Long story short. I have a sister-in-law that my wife and I helped out of a bad situation a few years ago. Her ex-husband is a straight-up punk, but he shares custody with my sister-in-law. Though I've never liked the arrangement, I've always been of the opinion that there was nothing I could do because the guy never abused the child from what I could see. Now that has changed and my niece came back with bruises on her back. Of course my first reaction is to kill this dude, but me being in jail doesn't help my family. I want this guy to lose custody and pay the price. Here's what I plan to do at this point any other info would be appreciated.

    1. File police report
    2. Take the kid to the hospital
    3. Call CPS
    Last edited by 2centsworth; 08-10-2008 at 11:02 PM.

  2. #2
    Five Rings... Kori Ellis's Avatar
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    How old is the child? Does she say the dad hit her?

  3. #3
    Five Rings... Kori Ellis's Avatar
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    Oh ... and to anyone who even thinks of trolling this thread - that would probably cause an instant ban. So consider yourself warned.

  4. #4
    I love craft beer. Sense's Avatar
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    Hmm... idk but I'd say take the child to the hospital first... ask the doctors if they seem like domestic violence, the bruises I mean.. have them examine (lol idk what they do) once you get their approval... file a police report... then CPS?

  5. #5
    Five Rings... Kori Ellis's Avatar
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    First of all - take pictures right now and make sure there's a date/time stamp on the camera.

    Then I would file a police report, and they will probably tell you to have her looked at by a doctor. And of course, call CPS.

    Or you can just take her to the hospital right now and if you say it's suspected abuse, they will call the police to the hospital.

  6. #6
    I love craft beer. Sense's Avatar
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    How old is the child? Does she say the dad hit her?
    I was thinking of this too....

    but if you want to file a report first, then I'm guessing she is claiming her dad hit her...

  7. #7
    Veteran marini martini's Avatar
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    Whuts up with the sis in law? Does she not have a say or signature involved in this???

  8. #8
    Homer 2centsworth's Avatar
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    How old is the child? Does she say the dad hit her?
    she's 6 and yes.

  9. #9
    5. timvp's Avatar
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    Yeah, I'd switch up the order. Hospital first to start the paper trail. At the hospital, if they suspect abuse, they will ask the child what happened. The police report will then be next -- perhaps initiated by the hospital depending on what the child says.


    ETA: Not sure of exact legalities but someone might have to go before a judge to get an emergency injunction to stop future visitation until situation is solved.

  10. #10
    Five Rings... Kori Ellis's Avatar
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    Take pictures right now and then take her to the hospital. From there, the police and CPS will get involved. The hospital will call the police and the police will give you info about CPS.

    Just make sure to take pictures right now before the bruises fade away.

  11. #11
    e^(i*pi) + 1 = 0 MannyIsGod's Avatar
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    You need to get to the Hospital right now. The personal there will put everything into order including CPS and the police but you need to go right now.

    BTW I'm sorry to hear about this Pete. You're very good people in my eyes and I'm sure you'll take care of your family in the right way. Good luck and I hope everything works out for the best.

  12. #12
    I love craft beer. Sense's Avatar
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    Take pictures right now and then take her to the hospital. From there, the police and CPS will get involved. The hospital will call the police and the police will give you info about CPS.

    Just make sure to take pictures right now before the bruises fade away.
    yep, evidence is key... even if the child claims her dad hit her, the pictures will be enough to take custody away from the father... more than enough, not to mention the hospital's take on it.

  13. #13
    Homer 2centsworth's Avatar
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    thanks guys. headed over there right now to take pics, sister-n-law already called cops, so hopefully they're there when I arrive. Will take kid to the hospital right after.

  14. #14
    Five Rings... Kori Ellis's Avatar
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    Good luck ... and don't go crazy and beat up the guy no matter how much you want to do it.

  15. #15
    Veteran marini martini's Avatar
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    Pete you and your family will be in my heart & prayers. What a good stand up man you are! Here's hoping for the best for that precious child!

  16. #16
    My Playlist > Yours Pistons < Spurs's Avatar
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    Lots and lots of pictures. Multiple angles and multiple light conditions. And like everyone has stated, the hospital is the first step. They'll put everything in motion form there.

    And make sure someone really talks to your niece, explaining to her what's going to happen and why. It's probably alot for a 6 year old to be put through, whether it's for her best interests or not. Talking to lots of strangers about things she probably doesn't want to talk about too much. Plus the whole issue of her talking getting her father in trouble. Just make sure someone is there for her at all times.

  17. #17
    Veteran marini martini's Avatar
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    Lots and lots of pictures. Multiple angles and multiple light conditions. And like everyone has stated, the hospital is the first step. They'll put everything in motion form there.

    And make sure someone really talks to your niece, explaining to her what's going to happen and why. It's probably alot for a 6 year old to be put through, whether it's for her best interests or not. Talking to lots of strangers about things she probably doesn't want to talk about too much. Plus the whole issue of her talking getting her father in trouble. Just make sure someone is there for her at all times.
    WoW!!!! Well said!

  18. #18
    Silence surpasses speech. duncan228's Avatar
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    I'm glad you're there and aware and care. Too many children go through horror because someone looks the other way and doesn't get involved. I hope everything works out, most of all I hope the child is okay and kept from any more harm.

  19. #19
    Ragecycling.com Vinnie_Johnson's Avatar
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    Good luck keep that poor little girl away from that monster. You are doing the right thing by not just diving over and beating him.

  20. #20
    Siren with a Siren RashoFan's Avatar
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    And make sure someone really talks to your niece, explaining to her what's going to happen and why. It's probably alot for a 6 year old to be put through, whether it's for her best interests or not. Talking to lots of strangers about things she probably doesn't want to talk about too much. Plus the whole issue of her talking getting her father in trouble. Just make sure someone is there for her at all times.
    Good point there Eric.

    Pete,
    If you need ANYTHING, let me know(BQ's take care of their own even after all these years). Your sister in law and neice are in good hands with you taking care of them in this situation. My thoughts and prayers for your family.

  21. #21
    JekkaIsGoddess Jekka's Avatar
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    I worked with a lot of child abuse cases with AmeriCorps - mostly sexual abuse, but I know that the forensic nurses look at nonsexual abuse cases as well. The nurses at Santa Rosa are awesome, and the child will be in very good hands. When you take a child to the hospital for abuse, they automatically summon the police and call CPS for you, so go to the hospital first and get it all done at once.

    My experience was all at Santa Rosa since that is where all child sexual abuse cases are taken in SA and the surrounding area (nurses who do those exams have extensive special training and certifications, and there aren't very many of them) - I don't know if another hospital would refer you there for the evidence, etc., but you can always go there first and possibly save yourself a few hours in another waiting room. (edit: nevermind, just saw that you had already taken her somewhere, but I'll leave this info in case anyone else should unfortunately ever need it)

    Best of luck to you - I saw way too many cases that got reported after the abuse had escalated way too far. She's lucky she's got you on her side.
    Last edited by Jekka; 08-11-2008 at 01:48 AM. Reason: Added more info

  22. #22
    JekkaIsGoddess Jekka's Avatar
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    Good luck ... and don't go crazy and beat up the guy no matter how much you want to do it.
    +1 - I've had to call the cops back to cases they'd already left before when parents and family have made verbal threats against a perpetrator, so be careful what you say and do.

  23. #23
    Too weird to live, and too rare to die. midgetonadonkey's Avatar
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    Hope everything is alright.

  24. #24
    Maaaaaannnn fuck.... E20's Avatar
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    Hope everything works out. Always ed up when people with defensless kids.

    My advice: look at your avatar LMAO

  25. #25
    Since 1992 Brutalis's Avatar
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    My advice is take her to the hospital. Tell the doctor what's going on and if he can confirm. If so he will notify the proper authorities with/for you and the situation will be handled correctly.

    Whatever you do DON'T fight the guy.

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