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  1. #26
    The Greatest Show on Earth LakeShow's Avatar
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    , I actually knew a guy who had something like this happen. Used a knife to carve an apple into a makeshift bong, put the knife down next to him, took a hit, passed it to his buddy, and sat back down on the knife that he put on his bed. Put a pretty deep gash in the back of his thigh.




    <B>
    Part 2 of 2: How to Roll a Blunt


    by: Mary Jane Girl

    -- Revised by Bud S. Moker, Th.C.
    Step 1:

    MaterialsCigar, weed, knife or scissors, grinder, lighter Step 2:
    Bust itLick your blunt until it is moist. Take a blade and cut a straight line lengthwise from butt to tip. Stick your thumb into the opened blunt and slide the insides (known as "guts") out. Don't try to push them all out at once because you can tear the blunt up that way.Step 3:


    Tear it
    At this point you can tear or cut off the rounded end of the blunt, or leave it there. I prefer to remove it because sometimes it causes you to roll the blunt shut. In this tutorial, we'll remove the end. Using only the inner layer will cut down on the amount of nicotine.


    Step 4:
    Lick itNow that you've got a nice rectangular blunt wrap, lick the edges to seal up any tears. Then, take the wrap and fold it in the center like you would for a joint.Step 5:
    Add itSpread the weed evenly down the length of the blunt. (If you don't use enough weed to support the size of the wrap it will collapse in on itself while you're trying to smoke.)Step 6:
    Fold itGive your blunt it's shape by carefully folding and rolling it up. Tuck the shorter side of the wrap around the weed, then continue to roll it all the way. Be careful not to pinch the ends shut or roll it too tight as this will cause you to pass out from sucking too hard.Step 7:
    Seal itLick the last half inch pf paper lengthwise. Then, press the rest carefully down to the blunt. (Blunt type is really important here, since some blunts are stickier than others.) Do not taper the ends too much as this can cause the blunt to end up with a hole too small to pull from.Step 8:
    Bake itTake a lighter and run it up and down the length of the blunt while spinning it. This will dry out the moisture and give it a good bake, which makes the blunt firmer. Don't let the fire linger in one spot too long or it will burn. Bake the blunt just long enough to make it firm and a little darker in colorStep 9:
    Spark itHold the fire at the very tip of the blunt. Spin the blunt around to evenly distribute the flame and minimize the possibility of developing runs. (Runs can be remedied by smearing saliva on the longer side of the cherry.)
    Step 9. Get high and lay on your knife!

  2. #27
    The Last Good Sport samikeyp's Avatar
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    dumbass.

  3. #28
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    Really is this the best story Paxson can come up with? Cutting apples in bed?

  4. #29
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    I'm really the only one who believes him huh? happens.
    Derrick "I sat on a knife" Rose, you have company in the stupid Chicago sports injury department. Remember when Michael Jordan misfired his cigar cutter and missed six weeks?

  5. #30
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    I'm really the only one who believes him huh? happens.
    I don't know what kind of knives you use for cutting apples but c'mon...10 s ches?? It just doesn't sound very plausible.

  6. #31
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    I don't know what kind of knives you use for cutting apples but c'mon...10 s ches?? It just doesn't sound very plausible.
    I sit at my desk all the time and carve up all sorts of fruits with a razor sharp back-packing knife, befitting of a Utah woodsman. True I haven't cut myself yet, but I can think of plenty of occasions where I've dropped my knife into my chair or onto the floor and then found it under my ass or foot half an hour later. It's just a matter of time before I do get cut really.

    So I don't know. It doesn't sound very plausible, but I don't think it particularly sounds implausible either and if Derrick Rose says that's how it happened I see no reason or anything in his character, to not give him the benefit of the doubt.

    Anyway I don't see what plausibility there is in alluding to his being stabbed while engaged in some sort of foul-mouthed practice or another, when there's really nothing to indicate that such an event ever took place. Besides his skin color of course.

  7. #32
    Believe. slowchild25's Avatar
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    I like Basketbawful.com's take on this:

    "Of course, a lot of people are already questioning what "really" happened, since Rose's story sounds too bizarre to be true (kind of like the time I got run over by a horse while riding my bike). But, in my experience, it's the weird stories that totally ARE true. And Rose isn't worried about what other people think. "It's the truth, so I'm not worried about [people not believing him]. I called my mom, and she was like, what are you doing? It was just a freak accident. I was very scared. I'm going to get somebody else to cut [the apple]. I'm not cutting it no more." Ah, to live in a world where, after a freak apple-cutting accident, you can respond not by simply being more careful next time, but by hiring someone to peel apples for you for the rest of your life. Awesome."

  8. #33
    Luck the Fakers Bob Lanier's Avatar
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    Why do you need to peel apples anyway? Most of the nutrients are in the skin, as is a good deal of the taste. Are his teeth bad?

  9. #34
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    He might br telling the truth but it then begs the question what person in their right mind cuts apples in bed. Is he really that lazy that he needs to cut apples in bed? Is funny to me that he makes it sound like is normal. Is almost as comical as Kramer tossing salads while taking a shower.

  10. #35
    Random member
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    what person in their right mind cuts apples in bed. Is he really that lazy that he needs to cut apples in bed?

    LOL, this is the only part of his story that I DON'T find strange.

    I cut fruit in my bed all the time. Not peel, but cut. I enjoy watching TV from my bed and having an apple or a peach or whatever.

  11. #36
    Out of the shadows lurker23's Avatar
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    Good thing Derrick Rose doesn't play in the Big Apple.

    The rookie point guard for the Chicago Bulls cut himself when he rolled onto a knife while eating an apple in bed, according to the Chicago Tribune.

    Rose needed 10 s ches to close the gash in his left forearm and missed Monday's practice, though he played later in the night against the New York Knicks, scoring 15 points in a 105-100 victory in Chicago.

    "It was a silly incident," Rose told the newspaper. "I was cutting up some food and I laid on a knife getting lazy in bed. I went to go get a bottle of water, came back, forgot the knife was there, then sat down and sliced my arm.

    "I panicked when it first happened and called my trainer. It was painful but I should be alright."

    Rose was the No. 1 overall pick in the NBA draft after leading Memphis to the national championship game as a freshman. He is averaging 18.5 points and 6.1 assists for the Bulls and is a frontrunner for NBA rookie of the year.

    Rose said he would have the s ches in his arm for 10-14 days.

    "It's just an unfortunate thing, but he'll be fine," Bulls coach Vinny Del Negro said. "He could've practiced today but more precautionary to let him relax a little after that incident and get some rest. Thank goodness it's not serious. It could've been a lot worse."

    http://msn.foxsports.com/nba/story/8...HCP/?gt1=39002

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