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His meter is all ed up.
"DIVORCE AGREEMENT"
Subject: JVT sharing an excellent "DIVORCE
AGREEMENT" (just received)
DIVORCE
AGREEMENT
Dear
American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists, Obama
supporters, etal:
We have stuck together since the late 1950s, but the
whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce.
I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future
generations, but sadly, this relationship has run its course. Our two
ideological sides of America
cannot and will not ever agree on what is right so let's just end it on friendly
terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go
our own way.
Following is a model agreement:
Our two groups can
equitably divide up the country by land mass each taking a portion. That will be
the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly
agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our respective
representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such
distinct and disparate tastes.
We don't like redistributive taxes so you
can keep them. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.
Since
you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA and the
military. You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell (YOU are,
however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all
three of them).
We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations,
pharmaceutical companies, Walmart and Wall Street. You can have your beloved
homeless, home boys, hippies and illegal aliens.
We'll keep the hot
Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks. We'll keep the Bibles and give
you NBC and Hollywood.
You
can make nice with Iran
and Palestine
and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can
have the "peace-niks" and war protesters. When our allies or our way of life are
under assault, we'll help provide them security.
We'll keep our
Judeo-Christian values. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism and
Shirley McClain. You can also have the U. N. but we will no longer be
paying the bill.
We'll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks and oversized luxury
cars. You can take every Subaru station wagon you can find.
You can give
everyone health care if you can find any practicing doctors. We'll continue to
believe health care is a luxury and not a right.
We'll keep The Battle
Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem. I'm sure you'll be happy to
subs ute "Imagine", "I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing",
"Kum Ba Ya" and/or "We Are the World."
We'll practice
trickle down economics and you can give trickle up poverty your best shot.
Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name and our
flag.
Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like
minded liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree, just hit
delete. In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you ANWAR which one of us
will need whose help in 15 years.
Sincerely, John J. Wall, Law Student
and an American
His meter is all ed up.
Good, right-wingers; you can clean up the ing mess you made with Wall Street and keep your ridiculously expensive system of health-care fraud. You can also finally start sending your own kids over to die in Iraq over some bull instead of ours. Good luck in making your own Christian Iran.
Yeah, like you bet us Saddam had Weapons of Mass Destruction.
"We have stuck together since the late 1950s"
L I E
In short:
WAAHHHH!!! I WANT MY BOTTLE!
Another thing... why do Republicans hate the ACLU so much?
One other thing... health care is a 'luxury' huh? Yeah, that will win you a whole bunch of votes next election... LMAO
Chain emails always make the best threads.
I'm a conservative who owns a Subaru. I guess I don't fit the mold.
Honestly, it would let us really decide, once and for all, whose ideas actually work in reality.
And when oil starts topping $200 a barrel, and the replacement costs of your vehicles are 3 times that of the silly station wagon, leaving us with a rather large chunk of disposable income to spend on say, preventive health care, we will outlive you, and won't feel all that bad.
... If you can find enough people to actually fill those combat boots, you are welcome to it.
Young republicans, in my experience, tend to avoid the military like the plague.
How would a nation of George Bushes and Cheneys actually have enough actual combat troops to invade anything?
Public service is very much a "liberal" value. In conservative land, who would actually work for the government, however small?
You keep Kenneth Lay (Enron), Bernie Madoff (ponzi), Bernard Ebbers (worldcom), Micheal Monus (Phar-mor), Mit Shah (Cendant), Maury Myers (Waste Management, Inc), Michael Saylor (Microstrategy), Dennis Koslowski (Tyco International), etc, etc, etc.
See how far investing in those companies gets you.
You keep the credit default swaps.
You keep the ARMs.
You keep the derivatives.
You keep big bad government out of regulating financial industry "innovation", and see how far that gets you.
By all means, then pass a law protecting hospitals who refuse patients emergency room treatment if there is no evidence of insurance.
"oops, I forgot my insurance card" becomes a death sentence, if you are unable to tell them what your insurance company is because you are unconcious and bleeding to death from a car wreck.
To summarize:
1) When Republicans win: "If you don't agree with us, you're a traitor."
2) When Republicans lose: "Let's secede!"
Poignant.
Funny, when I was in the overwhelming majority of enlisted troops I spoke with voted conservative. Of course, that was a decade ago.
these days, conservatives can't handle a situation at a gas station.
are these the kind of people you want making battlefield decisions?
what kind of decisions can be made while running away?
How about you just move to a conservative country like Saudi Arabia, where things are so great? Us hippie liberals can move to places like the Netherlands, Switzerland, or Germany where things are just horrible and in chaos.
So when liberals complained that Bush stole the election and wanted out of the country, they were told to STFU and move out.
I think it's only fair to say the samething you. STFU and move out. Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.
I missed out on which prominent republicans have said that.
are there any prominent republicans?
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