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  1. #26
    Don't stop believin' Dex's Avatar
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    If it were just up to you, I'd say the policy, because it's stupid. However, it would undoubtedly end up getting your kid stuck in the middle one way or another, and nobody can blame you for wanting to avoid that.

    to the plan of calling the parents. And if you talk to the teacher and she personally can't be understanding about it....smack him/her.

  2. #27
    Don't stop believin' Dex's Avatar
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    WTF????

    what happens if a sicko got hold of the book? he would have addresses of all the kids at the school. F that, the school better not have on my kids for all too see. i dont even have our # listed in the phone book.
    I know it is not hard for people to find you but lets not make it easy....
    I remember getting school directories all the way up through middle school. They send out a paper at the beginning of the school year where the parent can choose to not put your child's information in it.

    I can't guarantee that all schools do it, or still do...but kinda sad that we have to worry about these sort of things these days.

  3. #28
    Forum Official Personal Life Coach BacktoBasics's Avatar
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    Its not even a battle to win or lose. Just do what you want. You aren't responsible about the precious hurt little feelings of every bully or out there.

    Life is full of moments when you don't get chosen. As a human being...a child no less they have the right to associate with whomever they choose. You can't force a friendship it has to be earned.

  4. #29
    right about pizzagate Blake's Avatar
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    Its not even a battle to win or lose. Just do what you want. You aren't responsible about the precious hurt little feelings of every bully or out there.

    Life is full of moments when you don't get chosen. As a human being...a child no less they have the right to associate with whomever they choose. You can't force a friendship it has to be earned.
    there are possible scenarios that I've been playing out that I'm trying to avoid. I. do. not. want. to. go. to. the. school.

    I don't really know how this teacher will react. Based on the number of idiot teachers out there, it wouldn't surprise me if she were to pull my daughter aside and give her some kind of reprimand for not inviting everyone in the class....

    if she did that, it would chap my hide to no end and I would have to go to the school and give her the kind of verbal beatdown that would make her ears bleed.

    If teacher talks back, I may end up having to give the principal the same kind of verbal body slam which might include how the policy is screwed up and how the teacher talked back to me.

    I am trying to avoid any possible confrontations, because again, in the end, I won't win the battle/war. The policy will still be there next year and I'll just look like an ass.

  5. #30
    i hunt fenced animals clambake's Avatar
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    b2b.......i see an opportunity to branch out as a party planner.

  6. #31
    FINLEY destroys the mavs mrose31's Avatar
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    I had a birthday party for my daughter who just turned 5 a few months ago and we did not want to invite everyone but we decided to go ahead and invite everyone in her class thinking maybe only half of them would show up. We were wrong every single one we invited showed up. It was horrible and chaotic. We told her next time you will just have to pick 4 friends at most for your birthday party.


    What I thought was amazing is how into these birthday parties some of the parents are. I could not believe when I was talking to one of the mothers it was like she was keeping score. I was so shocked she apparently goes to every birthday party and she knew exactly which birthday parties we had been to and which ones we haven't. I was real uncomfortable when she asked why we missed a couple of the kids birthdays. Me thinking well these don't really mean much to me so I just said "sometimes I just forgot or decided to take a nap instead". The look on her face was priceless.

  7. #32
    Forum Official Personal Life Coach BacktoBasics's Avatar
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    there are possible scenarios that I've been playing out that I'm trying to avoid. I. do. not. want. to. go. to. the. school.

    I don't really know how this teacher will react. Based on the number of idiot teachers out there, it wouldn't surprise me if she were to pull my daughter aside and give her some kind of reprimand for not inviting everyone in the class....

    if she did that, it would chap my hide to no end and I would have to go to the school and give her the kind of verbal beatdown that would make her ears bleed.

    If teacher talks back, I may end up having to give the principal the same kind of verbal body slam which might include how the policy is screwed up and how the teacher talked back to me.

    I am trying to avoid any possible confrontations, because again, in the end, I won't win the battle/war. The policy will still be there next year and I'll just look like an ass.
    You've already won. They can't control birthday invitation. s sake man. There is nothing that they can do other than annoy you. I think its your obligation to step up and be the guy who says "enough dammit, my child has rights". Do us all a favor and do the right thing. Just put your giant weeping pussy in the fridge for a day or two and handle this like a man.

  8. #33
    Mrs.Useruser666 SpursWoman's Avatar
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    Me to kids: Big party, or big gift?
    Kids to Me: Big Gift.

    Problem solved.


    When they were young enough for the Chuck E. Cheese or Gattiland parties, I usually just gave them invitations to give to whoever they wanted to invite. No one ever told me they had to give one to everyone.

    *shrugs*

  9. #34
    00 06 12 13 20 21 32 44 5 bus driver's Avatar
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    I remember getting school directories all the way up through middle school. They send out a paper at the beginning of the school year where the parent can choose to not put your child's information in it.

    I can't guarantee that all schools do it, or still do...but kinda sad that we have to worry about these sort of things these days.


    this is a good example not to add your name

    http://www.ksat.com/news/19398822/detail.html

  10. #35
    Your so smart Online. Frenzy's Avatar
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    My kid's birthday is next week. She wants it at either Chuck Cheese or Incredible Pizza. She wants to invite friends from school. I'd like her to have friends from school at her party.

    Here's the problem:

    friggin school policy says that if you are going to give out an invitation, you must give it to the entire class so that "nobody gets their feelings hurt."

    I understand the policy. I hate the policy. I think it sucks and is more of this "give everyone a trophy that plays" mentality.

    I don't really know any of her friend's parents or I might just call them and tell them. Anyone have any ideas how to get around this so that I'm only inviting 2-3 kids instead of 22?
    I can't believe that. I'm taking my son out of school.

  11. #36
    needs a margarita
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    The policy was (at least when my kids were in elementary school) was that if you hand out invitations IN CLASS, you had to invite the whole class or just invite all girls or all boys. If you wanted to invite only a couple of kids, then you send out invitations privately, either phone call or by mail.

    Most PTAs gave out a student directory where you could choose to have your kid's name, address and number listed.

  12. #37
    right about pizzagate Blake's Avatar
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    I had a birthday party for my daughter who just turned 5 a few months ago and we did not want to invite everyone but we decided to go ahead and invite everyone in her class thinking maybe only half of them would show up. We were wrong every single one we invited showed up. It was horrible and chaotic. We told her next time you will just have to pick 4 friends at most for your birthday party.
    That's exactly what I'm afraid of!

  13. #38
    right about pizzagate Blake's Avatar
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    You've already won. They can't control birthday invitation. s sake man. There is nothing that they can do other than annoy you. I think its your obligation to step up and be the guy who says "enough dammit, my child has rights". Do us all a favor and do the right thing. Just put your giant weeping pussy in the fridge for a day or two and handle this like a man.
    It could end up more than a simple annoyance to me personally.

    However, I'm not going to do something that could potentially put my child in an awkward situation that she most likely won't understand but will most likely cry about......and again, it's a battle there is no way in I have a shot in the dark at winning.

    You may not know when to pick your battles, but at least your daughter will never question your manhood. Congrats for that.

  14. #39
    right about pizzagate Blake's Avatar
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    The policy was (at least when my kids were in elementary school) was that if you hand out invitations IN CLASS, you had to invite the whole class or just invite all girls or all boys. If you wanted to invite only a couple of kids, then you send out invitations privately, either phone call or by mail.

    Most PTAs gave out a student directory where you could choose to have your kid's name, address and number listed.
    That very well could be the policy here. I've been trying to find it and can't, but we remember the teacher talking about it at one of the parents night things a while back.

    I need to talk to the teacher.

  15. #40
    Forum Official Personal Life Coach BacktoBasics's Avatar
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    It could end up more than a simple annoyance to me personally.

    However, I'm not going to do something that could potentially put my child in an awkward situation that she most likely won't understand but will most likely cry about......and again, it's a battle there is no way in I have a shot in the dark at winning.

    You may not know when to pick your battles, but at least your daughter will never question your manhood. Congrats for that.
    I guess its too hard to explain to your kid that as a person, an independent individual, you have a right to chose or not chose who to hang out with. Some adults think its okay to decide who your friends are for you. Your mother and I prefer that you pick your friends yourself.

  16. #41
    right about pizzagate Blake's Avatar
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    I guess its too hard to explain to your kid that as a person, an independent individual, you have a right to chose or not chose who to hang out with. Some adults think its okay to decide who your friends are for you. Your mother and I prefer that you pick your friends yourself.
    she's 5 going on 6. It's hard to explain why she can't invite everyone.

  17. #42
    Believe. FortuneCookie's Avatar
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    You've already won. They can't control birthday invitation. s sake man. There is nothing that they can do other than annoy you. I think its your obligation to step up and be the guy who says "enough dammit, my child has rights". Do us all a favor and do the right thing. Just put your giant weeping pussy in the fridge for a day or two and handle this like a man.

    Strong and bitter words indicate a weak cause.


    Lucky Numbers: 11, 16, 36, 44, 51, 55

  18. #43
    Forum Official Personal Life Coach BacktoBasics's Avatar
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    Strong and bitter words indicate a weak cause.


    Lucky Numbers: 11, 16, 36, 44, 51, 55
    Stop owning me all over this board.

  19. #44
    Believe.
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    My kid's birthday is next week. She wants it at either Chuck Cheese or Incredible Pizza. She wants to invite friends from school. I'd like her to have friends from school at her party.

    Here's the problem:

    friggin school policy says that if you are going to give out an invitation, you must give it to the entire class so that "nobody gets their feelings hurt."

    I understand the policy. I hate the policy. I think it sucks and is more of this "give everyone a trophy that plays" mentality.

    I don't really know any of her friend's parents or I might just call them and tell them. Anyone have any ideas how to get around this so that I'm only inviting 2-3 kids instead of 22?
    Do what i did... have her get the kids phone numbers of the kids she wants to invite and call their parents directly. Worked great. Stupid schools.

  20. #45
    Esse quam videri ploto's Avatar
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    You want to teach your child to obey rules and to be sensitive to the feelings of others. Do not hand out the invitations at school. I am pretty sure the rule only applies to bringing them to school to hand out. Why would you want to hurt some of the kids' feelings on purpose, especially at that young age? It is not that difficult to mail the invitations or to call the 3 or 4 kids you want to invite.

    And the school does have a right to approve of anything you dispense at school.

  21. #46
    right about pizzagate Blake's Avatar
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    It is not that difficult to mail the invitations or to call the 3 or 4 kids you want to invite.
    it's not as easy as giving my kid 3 invitations with the kids name on it to take to school. Just an inconvenience to look up people and mail out invites.

    we'd been planning just to make it a family party, but just the other day she starts saying she wants to have a few of her friends to come. So we are in a sort of last second mode regarding this.

    Maybe I should show her that I'm a man like b2b and tell her "NO FRIENDS."

  22. #47
    Manure Ginobili Mixability's Avatar
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    Ask the principal if the school will be paying their share of the party by cash, check or charge. Go from there.

  23. #48
    Forum Official Personal Life Coach BacktoBasics's Avatar
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    it's not as easy as giving my kid 3 invitations with the kids name on it to take to school. Just an inconvenience to look up people and mail out invites.

    we'd been planning just to make it a family party, but just the other day she starts saying she wants to have a few of her friends to come. So we are in a sort of last second mode regarding this.

    Maybe I should show her that I'm a man like b2b and tell her "NO FRIENDS."
    or you could tell her to invite a few friends and give her the party she wants.

  24. #49
    Forum Official Personal Life Coach BacktoBasics's Avatar
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    Ask the principal if the school will be paying their share of the party by cash, check or charge. Go from there.

  25. #50
    right about pizzagate Blake's Avatar
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    Ask the principal if the school will be paying their share of the party by cash, check or charge. Go from there.
    principal: "None of the above. Go from here."

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