I guarantee her boyfriend is spooning other women like crazy behind her back.
Not necessarily because he wants to, but because he's not supposed to.
I guarantee her boyfriend is spooning other women like crazy behind her back.
Not necessarily because he wants to, but because he's not supposed to.he doesn't even care about screwing them anymore!
I sent my girl this article...and she wasn't having it lol.
Awesome!
Did she at least laugh about it or did she go into raging vagina mode because you suggested it?
It's an excellent idea. Clearly the concept of marriage is flawed. Well over 50% of marriages fail.
That has a lot more due to with current cultural beliefs and flaws than it does with marriage.
Some people get married for the wrong reasons, since there is no shame or penalty anymore for divorce. Marry for money, etc.
Some people aren't mature enough yet to get married, and rush into something. Then the times get tough, and they bail. It used to be that people worked through their problems... nowadays it's just accepted to quit and "find someone else"...
Loving relationships, even great ones with two mutually respectful partners, still go through tough times and hardships. You have to be dedicated to each other and to the ideal of marriage. Once you choose someone, you don't allow the thought of "divorce" to enter your head unless there is an obvious cir stance (domestic abuse, etc).....
We have many freedoms right now in 2010 as Americans, but just remember - not all people are ready to exercise those freedoms. Many people up, and that's why you have divorce rates so high..... which in turn creates single-parent households and dysfunctional / unprepared children for the real world.
Not marriage's fault.
Last edited by MiamiHeat; 08-03-2010 at 03:20 PM.
Marriage is an idea how could it have "fault"? I don't see how you refuted anything Tlong said.
She's alot like me in a sense that we are both really, really laid back and can enjoy sharing things. She laughed and said since (me) I'm a big believer in having an equal relationship, she gets something in return for my frolicking. I'm still waiting to see what it is, but overall she was laughing about it and actually heard about the article from one of her girlfriends.Awesome!
Did she at least laugh about it or did she go into raging vagina mode because you suggested it?
well, sucks for you I guess
Maybe you will meet him one day.
He will walk up to you and initiate casual conversation.
"damn, she sure knows how to suck . Does she make you spank her and call her a too?"
Yeah, but with all the Elizabeth Taylors of the world out there skewing the numbers I wouldn't rely too heavily on that statistic.
I really don't care what other people do in their own marriages ... I just know that's just not for me.
Sorry, honey.
All of this is hypothetical, Miami, not reality. I wouldn't cheat on her because I don't believe its worthwhile if I chose to be in a relationship. If she feels the need to venture out--that's on her. I can't force her to be in a relationship and be faithful. Just like you can't gurantee that your wife will always be true to you. The point is; not to get too worked up over the sanc y of a relationship. If you can't converse about the possibility of falling out of love with your significant other then you're going to become oblivious and fail to see the signs of someone wandering.
Maybe you will meet him one day.
He will walk up to you and initiate casual conversation.
"damn, she sure knows how to suck . Does she make you spank her and call her a too?"
is your friends name AK-47 ?
Naw, but his girl is Russian/Costa Rican...
I don't think the idea of marriage is flawed. It's the sexual monogamy as a socially-mandated requirement of marriage that leads to more problems than it should.
While you are correct that monogamy is reinforced by society, it's not the reason for it's widespread existence. Monogamy is instinctual, but it may be temporary for some people.... the question is - how long can it last? Many people have no problem being monogamous for a few years, but then they want to stray.
Almost all of the 5 great apes are territorial when it comes to mating. Heck, you can even say that almost all mammals are the same way.
1) The male wants to ensure his seed is passed on. He won't allow any other male to mate with the female. This is hard-wired in our biology for reproduction. We want our genes to spread, not another male's genes.
2) The female wants a secure, safe environment to raise the off-spring. She wants the male to stick around and provide food and safety, etc.. Having other females around are a direct risk to her and her children. It creates compe ion for food and protection, and it can affect the children's chances of survival.
The problem is, many mammals have multiple partners in their lifetimes, including the great apes. The male lion is territorial and keeps all the females to himself, but he still mates with more than one female. Chimpanzee's are the same way, you have a Male Alpha chimp who controls the troop and the mating within the troop. He doesn't share his females, but he has multiple females to mate with. In this way, females are usually always familiar with only one male partner, but the males are usually mating with more than one female.
So there is an argument that men have a biological drive in them to around....
but the body is primitive and we can't allow our bodies to control our behavior. It's the other way around. The mind controls the body, and so you CAN be happy in a monogamous relationship for the rest of your life, but it takes a certain level of development, goals, and maturity.
damn, thats a lot of words hurr durrr
I don't disagree with the assertion, but it's not for everyone. And it requires that both parties have a similar definition of commitment/monogamy/relationship/etc. and come to an agreement about what's going to work for them. Which takes a lot of work. Certainly more than just saying, "Okay, honey, I don't mind if you other women." Trust, honesty, and confidence all have to be there.
A well-written article, but the book/author covered is just terrible and lacks mostly any degree of realism. Like the man/dog analogy. For the majority of men, the problem simply isn't our leash or the hole under the fence (a groundless assumption implying "apparent, uncontrollable male nature" as the fault). It's far, far deeper than that, and it seems the only positive aspect of accepting such an idea is that the woman cheated on avoids the obvious pain of *gasp* perhaps taking at least a bit of blame for the relationship failing.
The book's premise is just a sad and laughable concept, really. Most men (and women) in committed relationships don't cheat unless they lose their inner connection with their significant other.
nvm
I'm just surprised there hasn't been a cold pizza reference tbh
Interesting concept....maybe some of the Pollyanna Poppers crew would subscribe to that type of arrangement.
I look at every relationship....and actually feel this way about everything;
EVERYTHING is temporary.
Marriage is temporary...one of the two people will either leave,cheat,move on....or in the best case scenario will stay many,many years and then die. Sooner or later it will end.
So I just act like I am in a temporary relationship because it is true.
I do my best in my marriage and don't worry about what my wife is going to do or might do or if she is going to be faithful or not...I just never try to swallow the illusion that this is permanent or that people should or should not cheat,etc...it is a waste of time.
Been married 8 years...have only been with the wife and really enjoyed her 100%--as opposed to some guys who have had affairs...and probably given 35% to the mistress....25% to the wife...10% to someone or something else...
I just chose to give all the 100% to her...
She appears to have been faithful but I can only speak about me ...every person has their choices and their conscience to deal with...should she decide to find someone else to give her time to or her love to or her affections to...then I will have to decide which road to take then...again this is all temporary and while I am here i will actually be here 100%.
I was single for many,many years and while I was single...I was actually there too-100%.
and enjoyed being single.
It is all temporary and NO-ONE can name one thing that isn't.
Men are biologically predisposed to have more than one sexual partner. Women may be too although I'm not sure. Just accept it.
lol I can barely get one woman much less two, some help this article is
"And kids are going to drink and smoke pot anyway, so why not do it with your supervision? Let's take the edge off!"
Power is not what a relationship is about--it's about trust. It's about going to bed at night knowing that person won't hurt you, no matter the eye-candy or the opportunity. He made a commitment to stay with you, not because he was afraid to be without you, but because he loves you, and expects you to do the same thing for him.
Otherwise YOU ARE NOT EXCLUSIVE! If you want to e things up, be a part of it--make it a threesome. Or you run the risk of him forming a more intimiate bond with someone else. If my girlfriend came to me and said "be with other people," I'd emotionally check out. I'd leave the relationship. What I hear is "you are just like every other knuckle-dragging, man" or "I want to cheat. I'll give you the option because you're a horny dog and you'll recipricate."
The most powerful woman is a single one.
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