My fiancee just left me

[vy65]

That's what I don't get it. Even if there was some other reason, can't you go with the catchall "I don't love you anymore and I've been drifting apart and I think we're too different blah blah blah"...?

That ain't how the works.

Frankly, if you leave her alone, I'd bet that she'll come crawling back to you within a couple of weeks. Sometimes, chicks have mental breakdowns and pull the whole "I need to be single for a while" bit. Once they have some distance, and return back to reality, they realize that they made a mistake.

I don't want to fill you with false hope; I don't know her or crap like that. I'm just speaking from experience ...

[Vici]

That's what I don't get it. Even if there was some other reason, can't you go with the catchall "I don't love you anymore and I've been drifting apart and I think we're too different blah blah blah"...?

I just read your long post a few pages back... it really seems like she started having feelings for someone else, probably her ex. Or at least some of those feelings resurfaced and she freaked out. That is natural though. Even when I see ex's who I could care less if they were dead, when I see them again I'm always flushed with old emotions.

Anyway, again I'm sorry man. Just remember that no matter how bad you have it, someone else has it worse. , I was engaged once and I lost her to leukemia. Now that never goes away.

[Latarian Milton]

it's no wonder she left. you're a loser and so is your german boyfriend, dirk.

being celibate doesn't make one a loser tbh. it's just the way we choose to live and we're happy with such life. findog just wrongfully challenged his fate by making love with a woman. God makes him a celibate and surely God must win.

[Koolaid_Man]

come on trolls have some respect for Findog

ok this one is just ing hilarious...prolly vulva

[NRHector]

If there's any woman reading this thread, what is your input about Fin's situation?

[Koolaid_Man]

If there's any woman reading this thread, what is your input about Fin's situation?

you need some answers bad don't ya.... you gonna be next watch ya back...Hector....

[Latarian Milton]

That ain't how the works.

Frankly, if you leave her alone, I'd bet that she'll come crawling back to you within a couple of weeks. Sometimes, chicks have mental breakdowns and pull the whole "I need to be single for a while" bit. Once they have some distance, and return back to reality, they realize that they made a mistake.

I don't want to fill you with false hope; I don't know her or crap like that. I'm just speaking from experience ...

he should have never got close to her in the first place. findog is made to be a celibate but it seems he didn't know it before. guys like findog are just too smart to get themselves stuck in a relationship/marriage tbh.

[Koolaid_Man]

being celibate doesn't make one a loser tbh. it's just the way we choose to live and we're happy with such life. findog just wrongfully challenged his fate by making love with a woman. God makes him a celibate and surely God must win.

yeah those women are filthy creatures I tell ya...just filthy....

[Giuseppe]

Certainly puts O & Forever and The Skunker into proper perspective, eh?

[Findog]

I just read your long post a few pages back... it really seems like she started having feelings for someone else, probably her ex. Or at least some of those feelings resurfaced and she freaked out. That is natural though. Even when I see ex's who I could care less if they were dead, when I see them again I'm always flushed with old emotions.

About 6 weeks ago, 2 months ago, she tells me the last guy she had a serious rel'ship with, they broke up 2 years before we met, (a guy she dogged whenever she mentioned him, but it's not like she always brought him up, when we would talk about past experiences with exes she would compare me favorably to him) emailed her wanting to get back together, and she emailed him back and said she was with me now and too bad, so sad. Then she says that she's had guys tell her they loved her before, that they would marry her before, and nothing lasted beyond a year, and she wanted to know if I was serious. And I assured her that I was, and she says "Good. I hate him. You're the one I want to be with."

I don't like the idea of her talking to exes at all, but the way it was presented, he contacted her, not the other way around, and based on her account, there was nothing to really be mad at her for. I would have preferred she just ignore him, but emailing him to tell him that he she was involved with somebody else could be interpreted as a courtesy. And if you were going to cheat on me, why would you even mention that you were talking to exes? The way our rel'ship was going, I would be none the wiser if she simply kept her mouth shut, and she didn't have much physical opportunity to do so, since we were together every Friday-Sunday and then another night during the week.

I'm not ruling it out, of course, but it doesn't seem likely either.

[Koolaid_Man]

About 6 weeks ago, 2 months ago, she tells me the last guy she had a serious rel'ship with, they broke up 2 years before we met, (a guy she dogged whenever she mentioned him, but it's not like she always brought him up, when we would talk about past experiences with exes she would compare me favorably to him) emailed her wanting to get back together, and she emailed him back and said she was with me now and too bad, so sad. Then she says that she's had guys tell her they loved her before, that they would marry her before, and nothing lasted beyond a year, and she wanted to know if I was serious. And I assured her that I was, and she says "Good. I hate him. You're the one I want to be with."

I don't like the idea of her talking to exes at all, but the way it was presented, he contacted her, not the other way around, and based on her account, there was nothing to really be mad at her for. I would have preferred she just ignore him, but emailing him to tell him that he she was involved with somebody else could be interpreted as a courtesy.

I just can't believe Joey Greco lives in your backyard and you didn't call him...real story is you were being cuckholded by your girl and her ex...and you liked it...problem is she did too and that ex hit a switch and now ole finny boy is history ....

[Giuseppe]

She sounds shallow and a little crass, Fin. She should never speak of her other relationships with you. Ever. It's in terrible taste to do so and reveals her inner being.

[Findog]

I just can't believe Joey Greco lives in your backyard and you didn't call him...real story is you were being cuckholded by your girl and her ex...and you liked it...problem is she did too and that ex hit a switch and now ole finny boy is history ....

maybe so, maybe so

[Koolaid_Man]

maybe so, maybe so

and there it is folks leave it to Kool to crack the code everytime...I'm a ing modern day Einstein...

[ElNono]

Sorry to hear that Fin.
I went through a relationship like that (not as close to marriage, but severe mood swing like that, no explanations, sometimes the 'I need time on my own' BS, severe broken heart, borderline-paranoia, etc.)
When I look back at it, I'm grateful that after the ensuing pain and recovery things didn't work out. It was a learning experience and an eye opener.
My advice, stay far... far away from women like that.

My next serious relationship was a couple of years after that one, and I met a much 'simpler' person (in terms of mood swings/personal complexity), whom I made clear from the get go that communication was priority number one. If she couldn't tell me how she felt, and she kept piling inside, then eventually it would all come out one day and we'll be screwed by then. We built a pretty solid relationship around that, and after dating for a little over a year, we moved together. We married shortly afterwards.

I have 5 years being married (anniversary this coming Saturday), and to be honest I'm probably the happiest married man alive. Wouldn't have it any other way really. But I also understand that I found the closest thing to what I wanted/needed, and that we're 100% honest to each other. We don't hold anything back. And that's what works great for us.

Ultimately, if she feels like she can dump you but she can't look at you straight in the eyes and tell you what she really thinks or how she really feels, then that's a mammoth warning light. Stay away. I understand the pain that goes through you, and I would say: try to keep distracted. Go play some basketball, keep your mind busy at work, and let time heal you. You will come out of this with a lot better idea of what you want from a relationship, and specifically what you absolutely do not want. And I'm sure someday you'll cross roads with your match. Really wish you the best bro, because I know how painful this can be. But there's always a light at the end of the tunnel.

[Vici]

About 6 weeks ago, 2 months ago, she tells me the last guy she had a serious rel'ship with, they broke up 2 years before we met, (a guy she dogged whenever she mentioned him, but it's not like she always brought him up, when we would talk about past experiences with exes she would compare me favorably to him) emailed her wanting to get back together, and she emailed him back and said she was with me now and too bad, so sad. Then she says that she's had guys tell her they loved her before, that they would marry her before, and nothing lasted beyond a year, and she wanted to know if I was serious. And I assured her that I was, and she says "Good. I hate him. You're the one I want to be with."

I don't like the idea of her talking to exes at all, but the way it was presented, he contacted her, not the other way around, and based on her account, there was nothing to really be mad at her for. I would have preferred she just ignore him, but emailing him to tell him that he she was involved with somebody else could be interpreted as a courtesy. And if you were going to cheat on me, why would you even mention that you were talking to exes? The way our rel'ship was going, I would be none the wiser if she simply kept her mouth shut, and she didn't have much physical opportunity to do so, since we were together every Friday-Sunday and then another night during the week.

I'm not ruling it out, of course, but it doesn't seem likely either.

That's the thing though is why would she even bother telling you? The only time I or my gf make a reference to an ex is when it has to do with a story. Apparently the same thing happened to my gf (ex called her up and wanted her back) and she didn't tell me because it was of no matter to either of us. Obviously she said no and that was that.

Remember that women are rarely straight forward and can't help but to play mind games. They can't keep secrets so you know what's on their mind by what they talk about. If it's anything about ex's, they are thinking about ex's. It doesn't matter if it is good or bad. The reason why men have such a bad rep is that we can keep secrets very well and very easily. We rarely talk about what is going on in our head.

[Koolaid_Man]

Sorry to hear that Fin.
I went through a relationship like that (not as close to marriage, but severe mood swing like that, no explanations, sometimes the 'I need time on my own' BS, severe broken heart, borderline-paranoia, etc.)
When I look back at it, I'm grateful that after the ensuing pain and recovery things didn't work out. It was a learning experience and an eye opener.
My advice, stay far... far away from women like that.

My next serious relationship was a couple of years after that one, and I met a much 'simpler' person (in terms of mood swings/personal complexity), whom I made clear from the get go that communication was priority number one. If she couldn't tell me how she felt, and she kept piling inside, then eventually it would all come out one day and we'll be screwed by then. We built a pretty solid relationship around that, and after dating for a little over a year, we moved together. We married shortly afterwards.

I have 5 years being married (anniversary this coming Saturday), and to be honest I'm probably the happiest married man alive. Wouldn't have it any other way really. But I also understand that I found the closest thing to what I wanted/needed, and that we're 100% honest to each other. We don't hold anything back. And that's what works great for us.

Ultimately, if she feels like she can dump you but she can't look at you straight in the eyes and tell you what she really thinks or how she really feels, then that's a mammoth warning light. Stay away. I understand the pain that goes through you, and I would say: try to keep distracted. Go play some basketball, keep your mind busy at work, and let time heal you. You will come out of this with a lot better idea of what you want from a relationship, and specifically what you absolutely do not want. And I'm sure someday you'll cross roads with your match. Really wish you the best bro, because I know how painful this can be. But there's always a light at the end of the tunnel.

you cats are ing hilarious with these long as love stories...like Luva said...dudes being raised by women are weak...

[NRHector]

Sorry to hear that Fin.
I went through a relationship like that (not as close to marriage, but severe mood swing like that, no explanations, sometimes the 'I need time on my own' BS, severe broken heart, borderline-paranoia, etc.)
When I look back at it, I'm grateful that after the ensuing pain and recovery things didn't work out. It was a learning experience and an eye opener.
My advice, stay far... far away from women like that.

My next serious relationship was a couple of years after that one, and I met a much 'simpler' person (in terms of mood swings/personal complexity), whom I made clear from the get go that communication was priority number one. If she couldn't tell me how she felt, and she kept piling inside, then eventually it would all come out one day and we'll be screwed by then. We built a pretty solid relationship around that, and after dating for a little over a year, we moved together. We married shortly afterwards.

I have 5 years being married (anniversary this coming Saturday), and to be honest I'm probably the happiest married man alive. Wouldn't have it any other way really. But I also understand that I found the closest thing to what I wanted/needed, and that we're 100% honest to each other. We don't hold anything back. And that's what works great for us.

Ultimately, if she feels like she can dump you but she can't look at you straight in the eyes and tell you what she really thinks or how she really feels, then that's a mammoth warning light. Stay away. I understand the pain that goes through you, and I would say: try to keep distracted. Go play some basketball, keep your mind busy at work, and let time heal you. You will come out of this with a lot better idea of what you want from a relationship, and specifically what you absolutely do not want. And I'm sure someday you'll cross roads with your match. Really wish you the best bro, because I know how painful this can be. But there's always a light at the end of the tunnel.

Dr. Love?

[Latarian Milton]

About 6 weeks ago, 2 months ago, she tells me the last guy she had a serious rel'ship with, they broke up 2 years before we met, (a guy she dogged whenever she mentioned him, but it's not like she always brought him up, when we would talk about past experiences with exes she would compare me favorably to him) emailed her wanting to get back together, and she emailed him back and said she was with me now and too bad, so sad. Then she says that she's had guys tell her they loved her before, that they would marry her before, and nothing lasted beyond a year, and she wanted to know if I was serious. And I assured her that I was, and she says "Good. I hate him. You're the one I want to be with."

I don't like the idea of her talking to exes at all, but the way it was presented, he contacted her, not the other way around, and based on her account, there was nothing to really be mad at her for. I would have preferred she just ignore him, but emailing him to tell him that he she was involved with somebody else could be interpreted as a courtesy. And if you were going to cheat on me, why would you even mention that you were talking to exes? The way our rel'ship was going, I would be none the wiser if she simply kept her mouth shut, and she didn't have much physical opportunity to do so, since we were together every Friday-Sunday and then another night during the week.

I'm not ruling it out, of course, but it doesn't seem likely either.

sounds like she treated you as a puppet. you were only used as a method of revenge against her ex-bf, and it's sure enough that she didnt love you as much as you think. she also treated her other ex-bfs this way i assume. she has no love at all, it's always the internal resentment that drives her to stay with a man, who she doesn't love at all. she lost all her love in her first relationship and surely she got hurt badly. the hath no fury like a woman scorned, tbh.

[Latarian Milton]

is romance still so pivotal for a 32yr old man?

[Vici]

I'm not trying to convince you that she cheated on you. I feel kind of bad looking at what I wrote. Just that there were multiple warning signs of what type of girl this is. ElNono made a great post above. Ask him how often his wife mentioned an ex and I'll bet it will be close to never.

The sad thing about all this is that it seems like when us guys finally figure all this BS out, we settle down and don't put it to good use lol. All my buddies are finally tying the knot and I'm one of the last few holding out lol.

[ElNono]

you cats are ing hilarious with these long as love stories...like Luva said...dudes being raised by women are weak...

Dr. Love?

I'm trying to encourage the guy from my personal experience.

Y'all can keep singing the 'broads' and the ' es' tunes, that's fine by me. I have no problem telling anybody that wants to hear it that I'm a happily married man.

[Koolaid_Man]

Mrs Kori Ellis I see you reading this thread...when are you gonna let Kool get into your good graces...I know you may not believe me when I type this but I love you. I love you for many reasons and they're valid...tbh I wanted to be the first on ST to say that but seriously for providing this medium for us I do...I do love you and I'm not ashamed to say it. ;-)

[Koolaid_Man]

I'm trying to encourage the guy from my personal experience.

Y'all can keep singing the 'broads' and the ' es' tunes, that's fine by me. I have no problem telling anybody that wants to hear it that I'm a happily married man.

that's cool man...I'm not hating on that...good luck to you and your wife...I'm just saying old fin is a nasty cuckhold...he don't want no real advice he just don't wanna come clean about how he likes to watch...it backfired on him and now he's out and staying out.

[Ignignokt]

Mrs Kori Ellis I see you reading this thread...when are you gonna let Kool get into your good graces...I know you may not believe me when I type this but I love you. I love you for many reasons and they're valid...tbh I wanted to be the first on ST to say that but seriously for providing this medium for us I do...I do love you and I'm not ashamed to say it. ;-)

six inches