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  1. #1
    5. timvp's Avatar
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    Do I got this right . . .

    -Becomes a star almost instantly.

    -Orlando fan gets worried that he will eventually want to leave like Shaq and everyone else.

    -D-Ho tells Orlando that he's different and that is love for God and the city will keep him around.

    -Continues to improve, the city of Orlando rallies around him because of his promises.

    -Steals Shaq's nickname. Tells Orlando it's just a coincidence.

    -Stan Van Gundy builds a team around him that fits flawlessly. All his strengths are magnified while his weaknesses are camouflaged.

    -Is so anti-clutch offensively that he get's carried to the Finals by Hed Turkglu of all players.

    -The horribleness of his Finals squad wasn't easy to instantly spot due to the horribleness of the eventual champions.

    -It turns out the only reason they made the Finals was because the Celtics were dealing with injuries.

    -The next year, Celtics bend over the Magic.

    -D-Ho suddenly starts talking about the allure of the big market.

    -Starts his passive-aggressiveness that sours the city of Orlando and ruins the chemistry of a successful team.

    -Loses in the first round to the Hawks because he couldn't exploit single coverage by Jasn Cllins

    -Instead of working to improve his game, he starts really pushing for a trade. Introduces a wishlist that consists of only the Nets.

    -Goes to the Magic and asks them to fire Stan Van Gundy, the guy who created the perfect storm around him.

    -Denies that he went to the Magic to get Stan Van Gundy fired.

    -Stan Van Gundy tells reporters that the Magic told him D-Ho wants him fired.

    -Caught in a lie, D-Ho sticks to his story even though it's clearly not true.

    -His teammates tired of him, as does his coach, and the Magic begin to suck.

    -The Magic tell him they will trade him but not to a team on his wishlist of one.

    -Orlando mentions the Lakers as a possibility but he says No because he doesn't want to go down the same path as Shaq even though he stole his nickname.

    -D-Ho panics and agrees to stay another year in Orlando.

    -A couple days later, wants to undo that decision.

    -Turns out to be too late to undo it.

    -Suddenly suffers a serious back injury that forces him to miss the rest of the season.

    -Sticks to his trade demand while only increasing his wishlist by one or two teams. Still doesn't have Lakers on his wishlist.

    -Gets traded to the Lakers for pennies on the dollar.

    -Claims that he loves the Lakers and how happy he is.

    -Ends up stealing Shaq's nickname and copying his career path.

    -Says his back injury is so serious that he can barely walk.

    -Magically is ready to play 40 MPG from Day 1 of the regular season.

    -Looks perplexed as to how to play basketball when the team isn't constructed to fit his strengths and weaknesses.

    -Kobe runs the ship as an alpha dog and D-Ho cowers like a beta.

    -Says how much he wished things ended differently with the Magic. Comes close to an apology.

    -Magic vs. Lakers gameday.

    -The Magic have a scrub team.

    -Employ Hack-a-Ho.

    -Howard can't shoot free throws or figure out how to defend without a set system around him.

    -Magic beat the Lakers, scoring 40 in the final quarter while he repeatedly bricked at the line.

    -Howard is so mad he walks off the court without shaking the hands of his ex-teammates.

    -Despite having Kobe playing better than he has in years on his team, D-Ho has the Lakers sub-.500.

    -D-H





    I didn't think it'd be possible for the Lakers to find a more Laker-ish player than Kobe by they succeeded.

  2. #2
    I Aint Got No Job Gutter92's Avatar
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    I think you forgot to include the part where he is nearing Shawn Kemp levels of illegitimate children, tbh...

  3. #3
    Veteran Arcadian's Avatar
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    Bynum > Howard

    2011-12 Lakers > 2012-13 Lakers

    Howard =

    Howard = will never crack the top 100 players of all time

    Howard

    Lakers

    es

  4. #4
    Soft Like Twinkie Filling Juggity's Avatar
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    Bargain bin Shaq.

  5. #5
    I Aint Got No Job Gutter92's Avatar
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    8-9

    "Steve Nash will fix it!!"

  6. #6
    I Aint Got No Job Gutter92's Avatar
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    lol @ Lakers being better with an injured Bynum than with a healthy Dwight

  7. #7
    I Aint Got No Job Gutter92's Avatar
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    @ being a bigger liability than Shaq late in the 4th quarter

  8. #8
    I Aint Got No Job Gutter92's Avatar
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    @ not learning from the 2004 mistake, stacking "superstars" one one team = guaranteed ring

  9. #9
    I Aint Got No Job Gutter92's Avatar
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    @ the Laker fans for the first few weeks after they got Dwight

  10. #10
    ( •_•)>⌐■-■ (⌐■_■) AaronY's Avatar
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    He ripped off Shaq again the other day when he dunked then looked at his hand in shock while running down the court like Shaq used to

  11. #11
    I Aint Got No Job Gutter92's Avatar
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    @ the absence of the aforementioned gots from the forum

  12. #12
    I Aint Got No Job Gutter92's Avatar
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    @ going with pringles over col. sanders on the sideline...

  13. #13
    ( •_•)>⌐■-■ (⌐■_■) AaronY's Avatar
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  14. #14
    boring is a quality
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    @ D'Antoni being outcoached by a rookie Coach

  15. #15
    🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆 ElNono's Avatar
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    The worst part is that D'Antoni doesn't have the balls to sit him when he's hacked like that and hack-a-ho prevents the Kobester from going hero-mode in the 4th until the last 2 mins. Vaughn just completely exposed that .

    Obviously, something is going to have to give in. Kobe has to have his hero-mode 4th quarters, so it's either sitting Dwight or firing the coach and bringing one in that will do it.

  16. #16
    boring is a quality
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    The worst part is that D'Antoni doesn't have the balls to sit him when he's hacked like that and hack-a-ho prevents the Kobester from going hero-mode in the 4th until the last 2 mins. Vaughn just completely exposed that .

    Obviously, something is going to have to give in. Kobe has to have his hero-mode 4th quarters, so it's either sitting Dwight or firing the coach and bringing one in that will do it.
    Pop was a great mentor

  17. #17
    Soft Like Twinkie Filling Juggity's Avatar
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    He ripped off Shaq again the other day when he dunked then looked at his hand in shock while running down the court like Shaq used to
    I guess he's buying into the Kobe theory of idol imitation: "Take everything that they did well and replicate it clumsily"

  18. #18
    俺はまんこが大好きなんだよ baseline bum's Avatar
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    Damn, LJ going HAM on Bible Kemp.

  19. #19
    俺はまんこが大好きなんだよ baseline bum's Avatar
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    The worst part is that D'Antoni doesn't have the balls to sit him when he's hacked like that and hack-a-ho prevents the Kobester from going hero-mode in the 4th until the last 2 mins. Vaughn just completely exposed that .
    D'Antoni doesn't have anyone to replace him in his 7-man rotation tbh.

  20. #20
    Spur-taaaa TDMVPDPOY's Avatar
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    heard his trying out to be a clown in some LA circus...

    his starting to be like shaq now, should just stfu

  21. #21
    Board Man Comes Home Clipper Nation's Avatar
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    Dwight Coward
    Not even the best center in LA

  22. #22
    Grab 'em by the pussy Splits's Avatar
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    Magic make it personal by beating, embarrassing Howard in upset win

    One by one, the Orlando Magic walked over to the Lakers bench, and embraced the amiable big man who left them in August. One by one, they chatted with him and laughed with him and showed how much they missed him. And then, one by one, they said goodbye and good luck to their old friend Earl Clark.

    The other amiable big man who went from Orlando to Los Angeles three months ago was already gone, down the tunnel and into the locker room, without so much as a handshake. Dwight Howard fled the court Sunday night, upstaged by the organization he paralyzed and the team he abandoned, in a game that will sting far more than the other eight the Lakers have already lost. The final score, 113-103, might as well hang on the Magic marquee all season.



    Read More: http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/201...#ixzz2DycRPZAP

  23. #23
    SeaGOAT midnightpulp's Avatar
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    A very accurate recording of events.

  24. #24
    The Timeless One Leetonidas's Avatar
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    when you put it like that....

  25. #25
    2 Doors Down BillMc's Avatar
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    Are we really so sure Dwight has the Hall of Fame locked up? I guess all those DPOY will make it certain...

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