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  1. #26
    ... scanry's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
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    4,962
    Damn, LJ going HAM on Bible Kemp.
    Without any protection whatsoever. Damn.

  2. #27
    GOING FOR GOLD JRHernandez88's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
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    1,758
    Lol D-Ho
    Lol George Hill @ the buzzer
    Lol Lakers
    Lol Laker fans
    Lol AA 30
    Lol Clippers are better

  3. #28
    ( •_•)>⌐■-■ (⌐■_■) AaronY's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Post Count
    8,287

  4. #29
    MVParker racm's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
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    6,787
    Hack-a-Ho
    worse than the Dubs

  5. #30
    Dragic to Spurs!!! Kamnik's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Post Count
    2,209
    Do I got this right . . .

    -Becomes a star almost instantly.

    -Orlando fan gets worried that he will eventually want to leave like Shaq and everyone else.

    -D-Ho tells Orlando that he's different and that is love for God and the city will keep him around.

    -Continues to improve, the city of Orlando rallies around him because of his promises.

    -Steals Shaq's nickname. Tells Orlando it's just a coincidence.

    -Stan Van Gundy builds a team around him that fits flawlessly. All his strengths are magnified while his weaknesses are camouflaged.

    -Is so anti-clutch offensively that he get's carried to the Finals by Hed Turkglu of all players.

    -The horribleness of his Finals squad wasn't easy to instantly spot due to the horribleness of the eventual champions.

    -It turns out the only reason they made the Finals was because the Celtics were dealing with injuries.

    -The next year, Celtics bend over the Magic.

    -D-Ho suddenly starts talking about the allure of the big market.

    -Starts his passive-aggressiveness that sours the city of Orlando and ruins the chemistry of a successful team.

    -Loses in the first round to the Hawks because he couldn't exploit single coverage by Jasn Cllins

    -Instead of working to improve his game, he starts really pushing for a trade. Introduces a wishlist that consists of only the Nets.

    -Goes to the Magic and asks them to fire Stan Van Gundy, the guy who created the perfect storm around him.

    -Denies that he went to the Magic to get Stan Van Gundy fired.

    -Stan Van Gundy tells reporters that the Magic told him D-Ho wants him fired.

    -Caught in a lie, D-Ho sticks to his story even though it's clearly not true.

    -His teammates tired of him, as does his coach, and the Magic begin to suck.

    -The Magic tell him they will trade him but not to a team on his wishlist of one.

    -Orlando mentions the Lakers as a possibility but he says No because he doesn't want to go down the same path as Shaq even though he stole his nickname.

    -D-Ho panics and agrees to stay another year in Orlando.

    -A couple days later, wants to undo that decision.

    -Turns out to be too late to undo it.

    -Suddenly suffers a serious back injury that forces him to miss the rest of the season.

    -Sticks to his trade demand while only increasing his wishlist by one or two teams. Still doesn't have Lakers on his wishlist.

    -Gets traded to the Lakers for pennies on the dollar.

    -Claims that he loves the Lakers and how happy he is.

    -Ends up stealing Shaq's nickname and copying his career path.

    -Says his back injury is so serious that he can barely walk.

    -Magically is ready to play 40 MPG from Day 1 of the regular season.

    -Looks perplexed as to how to play basketball when the team isn't constructed to fit his strengths and weaknesses.

    -Kobe runs the ship as an alpha dog and D-Ho cowers like a beta.

    -Says how much he wished things ended differently with the Magic. Comes close to an apology.

    -Magic vs. Lakers gameday.

    -The Magic have a scrub team.

    -Employ Hack-a-Ho.

    -Howard can't shoot free throws or figure out how to defend without a set system around him.

    -Magic beat the Lakers, scoring 40 in the final quarter while he repeatedly bricked at the line.

    -Howard is so mad he walks off the court without shaking the hands of his ex-teammates.

    -Despite having Kobe playing better than he has in years on his team, D-Ho has the Lakers sub-.500.

    -D-H





    I didn't think it'd be possible for the Lakers to find a more Laker-ish player than Kobe by they succeeded.
    This totaly made my day! Thanks man!

  6. #31
    5 Bill_Brasky's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Post Count
    11,220
    Bible Kemp
    One post move
    Gasol settling for jumpers and not playing in the post where 7 footers belong
    wasting one of Kobe's better years
    Kobe beginning to realize that Dwight is lazy

  7. #32
    Purple and Bold! whitemamba's Avatar
    My Team
    Los Angeles Lakers
    Post Count
    9,962
    Dwight Coward
    Not even the best center in LA

    ban

  8. #33
    Purple and Bold! whitemamba's Avatar
    My Team
    Los Angeles Lakers
    Post Count
    9,962
    This totaly made my day! Thanks man!
    maybe u should go blow him as a sign of gra ude

  9. #34
    The D.R.A. Drachen's Avatar
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    San Antonio Spurs
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    11,214
    I am just waiting for his new movie about being a sorcerer who helps a little kid named "Alakazam" and his rap album named "Dwight-Chi"

  10. #35
    The D.R.A. Drachen's Avatar
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    Also, I feel like the timeline should include going to a porn star's house where she is "meeting" with an old member of N'sync, then pulling down his pants crying and begging her to take him back.

  11. #36
    CDs Nuts. resistanze's Avatar
    My Team
    Toronto Raptors
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    23,869
    He's just so ing corny. I don't get why people are so suprised Shaq constantly takes s on him.

  12. #37
    Veteran
    My Team
    Los Angeles Lakers
    Post Count
    5,529
    17 Laker related threads.

  13. #38
    R.C. Deez Nuts. Mugen's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
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    23,765
    You forgot the part where he got cuckolded by det guy from NSYNC over a porn star

    http://technorati.com/sports/article...y-says-dwight/

  14. #39
    R.C. Deez Nuts. Mugen's Avatar
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    23,765
    Also, I feel like the timeline should include going to a porn star's house where she is "meeting" with an old member of N'sync, then pulling down his pants crying and begging her to take him back.
    haha damn beat me to it

  15. #40
    俺はまんこが大好きなんだよ baseline bum's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
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    97,883
    Damn, Mugen... and Mary Carey is ugly as

    Nothing, however, quite compares to this story, which involves Howard, porn-star Mary Carey and former 'NSYNC'er Chris Kirkpatrick:

    “Dwight’s a cool guy. For a month, we like talked on the phone, and he was always trying to give me prayers to get me out of porn and give me Bible verses to read. So then, I was going to go visit him when I was in Orlando, but I went over to this other guy’s house instead, Chris Kirkpatrick from N’Sync. And then Dwight started calling, and calling, and calling me, because he knew I was with Chris Kirkpatrick, so eventually at 3 in the morning, Chris was like don’t answer Dwight’s calls.

    “I get a text from Dwight at 3 in the morning — I’m outside Chris’s house. I’m like oh my god, what do I do? I was like, I got Dwight here and I got Chris in the other room and I’m talking to them back and forth. So finally I had to just pull Dwight in the bathroom and tell him he needs to go home. I was like I’m really sorry, I really like you, but this isn’t the time or place. When I pull him in the bathroom, he pulls his pants down, I was like, whooa. Yeah, and so I ran and started screaming …

    “Well if it wasn’t for the Chris thing at the time, I really liked Dwight and maybe I would have furthered this. But I was at the guy’s house I was dating so it was inappropriate. So he totally thought he totally offended me. So I saved — he and I used to talk on instant messenger, on AOL — so he was apologizing; ’sorry, that was out of character for me,’ blah blah blah. I saved all the instant messages and I’ve been putting them all in a book. So I’ve got a lot of evidence. I’ve got an evidence file.”

  16. #41
    Spur-taaaa TDMVPDPOY's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
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    41,384
    does dho think his eddy curry, pullin his pants down and tellin ppl to touch it?

  17. #42
    2015 NBA Champs ClipperLuva's Avatar
    My Team
    Los Angeles Clippers
    Post Count
    164
    Add another to the timeline, losing to bearded hardon while bean struggled to right the ship. ty ft shooting and all

  18. #43
    SeaGOAT midnightpulp's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
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    27,061
    Damn, Mugen... and Mary Carey is ugly as


    Dwight was sprung on this beast:


  19. #44
    Veteran Spurs9's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
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    7,081


    Dwight was sprung on this beast:

    Looks like a man tbh

  20. #45
    R.C. Deez Nuts. Mugen's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Post Count
    23,765
    gettin cuckolded by dis


  21. #46
    SeaGOAT midnightpulp's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Post Count
    27,061
    gettin cuckolded by dis


  22. #47
    Lab Animal Capt Bringdown's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Post Count
    11,443
    Howard is Kevin Willis on steroids.
    Hall of Famer? fuggetabou .

  23. #48
    Veteran Arcadian's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
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    9,423
    We can now add to this timeline: Swept in round 1 by the Spurs, putting out of its misery "the nightmare he just couldn't wake up from."

  24. #49
    ( •_•)>⌐■-■ (⌐■_■) AaronY's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Post Count
    8,287
    that OP is hilarious..

  25. #50
    Veteran Arcadian's Avatar
    My Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Post Count
    9,423
    I know, I can't believe no one had bumped it since December...

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