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I wanna smell like a seventh grade locker room
MAN SUES AXE SPRAY FOR NOT BRINGING HIM THE LADIES
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Sun, 12/08/2013 - 15:53 -- Guy
Axe Gets Axed
For those that have never smelled it, Axe body spray smells just like the confusion you experienced in the 7th grade after you kissed your first girlfriend for the first time, then, two weeks later, she broke up with you because she thinks you’re not “the one.” In other words, if you could bottle pure pubescence, add a touch of pine scented air freshener to it, and then incorporated a heavy dose of liquid delusion, you would get Axe body spray.
The truth is those commercials with the dudes spraying themselves and the packs of rabid women rushing to said dude are pretty damn far from reality, unless, of course, you’re in to younger chicks – ladies of the middle school variety. Today the world gets word of one man from India that found out a single spray of the canned baggary that is Axe (or “Lynx,” as it’s called in India) will not get you laid.
26-year-old Vaibhav Bedi is suing the makers of the spray because he’s been using it and its many side products for 7 years with hopes that it would bring him all kinds of foxy ladies. He got roughly zero foxy ladies.
“The company cheated me because in its advertisements, it says women will be attracted to you if you use Axe. I used it for seven years but no girl came to me,” said Bedi as he stuck his head inside of a tree trunk hoping some elves would give him some freshly baked cookies.
The saddest part of it all is that court officials in New Dheli have accepted Bedi’s pre-used samples of Axe shampoos, deodorants, sprays and body washes, which they will then subject to rigorous forensic testing’s to prove whether or not the smell of an idiot is in fact the mythical Love Potion No. 9.
“There is no data to substantiate the supposition that unattractive and unintelligent men don’t attract women,” said India’s leading compensation lawyer Ram Jethmalani.
Jethmalani went on to say, “In fact, some of the best-looking women have been known to marry and date absolutely ghoulish guys.” In response, Bedi squinted his eyes, turned his head in thought, and then finally said, “Screw you, man.”
http://news.awfbase.com/content/man-...s#.UqWR6PTuIrU
So no woman axed him out?
We are all adults, and we all know advertising is sometimes comical, and almost always bull .
That said, you know what? I'm sick and tired of the lies we see day to day. I would get a very satisfying laugh if this guy wins the suit, and advertisers end up changing their way.
dude might have also sued some underwear brands for not giving him a hunky muscular body like what he saw in those underwear commercials, tbh.
Not the same. Those commercials don't show some scranny or fat dude putting them on and then becoming models.
I am totally behind this guy. Just the other day I got lonely and so I bought a couple of cases of Coors light in hopes of people showing up to hang out. I'm still waiting. The ice has melted. The beer is getting warm.
I'm suing Proactive.
Of course, no cologne is gonna have girls chasing you, but damn some EDT/EDP work pretty well
Get a bag of white powder, make it known. Problem solved.
This. Or, a baggie of mollies and you'll be smashing the pu##y like it was goin' out of style.
shoulda invest in white pants, that gets u chicks
My Jorden's never got me an NBA contract!!!! what a frigging jip!!! Same as people suing MCdonalds for making them fat. The world we live in....
Can I sue AXE for giving me a headache?
Real men use old e tbh.
Why didn't you spray yourself the scent of money, you idiot!
Brut and Aqua Velva too.
This was all the rage in the locker rooms when I was in 9th grade.
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