pregnancy and wedding

[sonic21]

Absolutely! If it's a boy, name him Sawyer.

well your life will not be easy if your name is sawyer

[hater]

So my girlfriend and i were planning on getting married next summer. We found out a few weeks ago she was pregnant.

So we finally told her granmother she was pregnant. Now she insists we have to get married before the birth. She even said she would not come if we're still getting married next year.

I hate people like that, i mean WTF... ruining a moment like that. She's not even a religious person. She's just trying to piss us off.

She's the only person who doesn't like me in her family, i'm hoping it will not create too much drama.

congrats. right now your #1 priority should be your woman. her grandma. tell he to go to

[JudynTX]

well your life will not be easy if your name is sawyer

Based on the show, yes. As long as the baby is healthy is all that matters.

[mrsmaalox]

congrats. right now your #1 priority should be your woman. her grandma. tell he to go to

Whatever you do, do NOT her grandma!!

[sonic21]

Whatever you do, do NOT her grandma!!

[Viva Las Espuelas]

just reenact the last 5 minutes of psycho II with the grandma. problem solved. i can't find the youtube or i'd put it up

[easjer]

Congrats on the pregnancy and good luck with the wedding. There really isn't any purpose in piling that stress and financial burden directly on top of a pregnancy, imo - I think you're doing the smart thing in waiting.

[ploto]

Just a question: Did you actually expect her grandma to jump for joy at the news? Did you not have some idea that she would expect you to get married before you had a baby? In that generation, people got married if someone got pregnant. Give her time and hopefully she will calm down.

Also remember that this is HER grandma and not yours. It is best to "make" each person deal with his or her own family. Some of the worst marital problems are caused by the unwillingness of one partner to handle the issues caused by that person's own relatives and the subsequent meltdown that inevitably occurs when the spouse tries to deal with the in-laws. Your girlfriend needs to decide how to deal with her grandma. This notion that people assume she will just cut the woman out of her life is presumptuous without knowing the nature of their relationship and how much it means to this girl. If you battle the grandma, the girl could end up defending her.

[mrsmaalox]

Just a question: Did you actually expect her grandma to jump for joy at the news? Did you not have some idea that she would expect you to get married before you had a baby? In that generation, people got married if someone got pregnant. Give her time and hopefully she will calm down.

Also remember that this is HER grandma and not yours. It is best to "make" each person deal with his or her own family. Some of the worst marital problems are caused by the unwillingness of one partner to handle the issues caused by that person's own relatives and the subsequent meltdown that inevitably occurs when the spouse tries to deal with the in-laws. Your girlfriend needs to decide how to deal with her grandma. This notion that people assume she will just cut the woman out of her life is presumptuous without knowing the nature of their relationship and how much it means to this girl. If you battle the grandma, the girl could end up defending her.

This is the most important advice here I think.

[Phineas J. Whoopee]

The way to deal with the grandma is to make the decision together and then grandma will have to deal with your decision.

[angel_luv]

Congratulations on your upcoming wedding and especially on your baby. You are very blessed!

[Trainwreck2100]

That's pretty ghetto to have your kid show up to your wedding.

[ChumpDumper]

Pregnant brides always crack me up for some reason. I guess they can try on their dresses years later and say "See, it still fits!" even if they just get fat.

[Strike]

Just a question: Did you actually expect her grandma to jump for joy at the news? Did you not have some idea that she would expect you to get married before you had a baby? In that generation, people got married if someone got pregnant. Give her time and hopefully she will calm down.

Also remember that this is HER grandma and not yours. It is best to "make" each person deal with his or her own family. Some of the worst marital problems are caused by the unwillingness of one partner to handle the issues caused by that person's own relatives and the subsequent meltdown that inevitably occurs when the spouse tries to deal with the in-laws. Your girlfriend needs to decide how to deal with her grandma. This notion that people assume she will just cut the woman out of her life is presumptuous without knowing the nature of their relationship and how much it means to this girl. If you battle the grandma, the girl could end up defending her.

Good point. Sonic, if your girl and her grandma are close, your girl needs to deal with it. Like Ploto said, if you say or do something to upset the grandma, your girl could end up defending her and turning on you. Have your girl deal with the grandma, be there to back her up.

[iilluzioN]

Do what makes the two of you happy. Don't worry about anyone else.

best advise iv ever ing heard

[Crookshanks]

Why is everyone being so hard on the grandmother? She comes from a generation where people got married BEFORE they had children; and if there was an out of wedlock pregnancy, the couple quickly and QUIETLY got married.

Now - it seems it's perfectly fine to have the baby first and then get married... or not. And maybe the grandmother doesn't want her great-grandchild to be illegitimate - she comes from the generation where they had a name for those children...

[Strike]

Why is everyone being so hard on the grandmother? She comes from a generation where people got married BEFORE they had children; and if there was an out of wedlock pregnancy, the couple quickly and QUIETLY got married.

Now - it seems it's perfectly fine to have the baby first and then get married... or not. And maybe the grandmother doesn't want her great-grandchild to be illegitimate - she comes from the generation where they had a name for those children...

That's like excusing the old racist grandfather for his racism because "he's from a different time". The times of bas children and the stigma of being an unwed mother is gone.

And, again, THE GRANDMOTHER IS NOT GETTING MARRIED!!! If she doesn't want to show up to her ADULT granddaughter's wedding because of a conscious, adult choice that Sonic and his woman made, that's on her. She risks upsetting her granddaughter, nothing more.

[Chingo Bling]

Ok I am ehlost. Jou are going impregnate an abuela name Mary?

[sonic21]

Like i said it's my girlfriend's call, i didn't say anything when she was talking with her granmother. Her granfather and I just left the room during their argument. They're not really close, my GF was really mad after their discussion.

We really like the idea of our child being present at our wedding. So maybe we'll wait a few more months before getting married.

We'll wait a few days to see if she has changed her mind. Then we'll see...

[CuckingFunt]

In general, I agree with the advice to do what make you guys happy, but family is a sticky thing and needs to be respected.

Kind of surprised it hasn't been suggested here yet, since it seems so obvious, but why not do a quickie Justice of the Peace wedding now to make the kid legit and the grandmother happy, but still plan a big ceremony for later? Seems the easiest way to satisfy everyone.

[PM5K]

What a stupid ing old idiot, you're supposed to get married before you knock the up, after that it doesn't really ing matter.

[PM5K]

They're not really close

Who gives a then?

We really like the idea of our child being present at our wedding

What trailer park do you live in?

[eyeh8u]

wow no one is taking grandmas side

If you want to know why she is insisting you get married first i will tell you. You said it yourself she doesnt like you. Something about you makes her think you are untrustworthy. She knows what it is like having kids, if you haven't held you day old baby in your arms, no matter how you think you are going to feel, you wont know until the day you do. She is afraid that once you see the actual baby you might cut and run. Open and honest dialog can get you past this if you really want. Make her trust you and she wont care when you get married

[PuttPutt]

If you want to take grandma's side, like CuckingFunt said, do the Justice of the Peace thing. You'll be married, but you can always do a big ceremony later. You'll make an untrusting grandmother realize something (exactly what I don't know) & shut her the up. But pregnancy & wedding plans together are very stressful. , pregnancy is stressful. (my wife is 7 months pregnant with our 2nd). My cousin is in the same situation right now, but they had planned on getting married anyway. They've just sped it up a bit. You guys HAVE to do what is best for the 2 of you. If you really love her, marry her. If not, just do the right thing & take care of your kid when it's born.

[bugoy]

seriously, last thing you want to do is force yourself into a wedding, do it at your own pace, forcing issues always messes things up