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Well said!
I didn't read this all but it seems like a damn long post over just going on a date with a guy, I mean he's probably not going to rape you in the butt or anything.
What's the worst that could happen, a bad date with a guy you never talk to and didn't even know his name?
I thought this was going to be about dating a co-worker, but you don't even know him...
Well said!
I think I've been the 'practice' guy a few too many times.
I didn't even mean by dating.You may not have a good experience with it, but she's a vibrant young woman that seems to want to have a good time. Dating is a normal, healthy part of growing up and finding out not only about other people, but more importantly, about yourself.
I meant by
oh forget it.
well when the woman says "You be shirts..."I think I've been the 'practice' guy a few too many times.
practice comes to mind
Sounds better than pity date, doesn't it?
Dating is easy when you stop caring. Relax, go with the flow and keep an open mind.
And if all else fails, drink. Heavily.
I think Kori is the most on track here. Your mind seems well made up. But in the future remember "not attractive" could mean he is very attractive on the inside. "not confident" could mean he's reserved and respectful. "Too shy" could mean he is like very much like you---inexperienced. As far as dating someone from work, I don't think there is anything wrong with that; as long as it is discreet and you are not prone to drama, you already have something in common to talk about and break the ice. Also, at least you know he is employed! I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt, because I would like others to be equally as considerate of me, especially if they don't really know me or much about me. I think you should tell him the truth; you are uncomfortable and would liketo talk to him more. Then have him call you acoupleoftimes and talk on the phone alot. You'll get a better feel for him and decide easier if you want to date him or at least how many of the previously mentioned "precautions" you'll need to take. He could actually be feeling the exact same way as you! Keep in mind that finding the right person is not easy and sometimes you need to take a risk; Prince Charming is not just going to show up at your doorstep. Good luck!!
Wich she wont do cause she doesn't drink...And if all else fails, drink. Heavily
Awww, don't feel bad. Anyone who's ever been on a date that didn't lead anywhere was technically a "practice guy/girl."
Very well said.I think Kori is the most on track here. Your mind seems well made up. But in the future remember "not attractive" could mean he is very attractive on the inside. "not confident" could mean he's reserved and respectful. "Too shy" could mean he is like very much like you---inexperienced. As far as dating someone from work, I don't think there is anything wrong with that; as long as it is discreet and you are not prone to drama, you already have something in common to talk about and break the ice. Also, at least you know he is employed! I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt, because I would like others to be equally as considerate of me, especially if they don't really know me or much about me. I think you should tell him the truth; you are uncomfortable and would liketo talk to him more. Then have him call you acoupleoftimes and talk on the phone alot. You'll get a better feel for him and decide easier if you want to date him or at least how many of the previously mentioned "precautions" you'll need to take. He could actually be feeling the exact same way as you! Keep in mind that finding the right person is not easy and sometimes you need to take a risk; Prince Charming is not just going to show up at your doorstep. Good luck!!
Technically, dates that lead somewhere can be labeled "practice" as well.
I am not looking to date the guy, if that is what you mean by giving him a chance.
That said, I am willing to go out to dinner with him if we can go dutch and if the focus is getting to know each other as friends only.
When ( if) he calls, that is what I will tell him and then he can decide if he still wants to meet up or not.
OK, maybe you meant she's not missing much regarding the GHB post. But you told her that if she had second thoughts then she is not ready for the dating scene. WTF??? So if you have second thoughts about things, you're not ready for them? I wholeheartedly disagree.
I'd love that to be the reason.
I don't think it's the greatest idea to judge a guy before you know him, you could certainly end up liking the guy, you obviously haven't even given him a chance, and you obviously don't know much about him considering you didn't even know his name.
Yes, that's what I figured by your initial post. So that's why you shouldn't go out on a dinner date.
If he wants to hang out as friends, that's fine. But I doubt he will. He obviously asked you out on a date. Dates are for people who are interested in MAYBE being more than friends down the line.
But just to clarify, there's no strings attached just because you go on a date. Accepting a date just means that you are open to perhaps getting to know the person more than platonically.
That's what I thought too. But it seems like she already decided that she won't ever being interested in him for anything more than friendship. And if that's the case, she shouldn't waste his time.
I realize this.
My concern is that I don't want to be careless with his emotions- make him think that I might develop feelings when there is a chance I might never.
If he would like for me to sit down to dinner and get to know him better, that I can do.
But beyond that I can't make any promises.
And it isn't like I am actively seeking a boyfriend.
I look forward to the time when those romantic feelings come and are reciporcated.
That just has not happen yet and so I am happily without a boyfriend.
You do realize that with every person that you ever go out with there is a chance that you might never develop feelings for him.
There's also a chance that you might develop feelings for him and he might develop no feelings for you whatsoever.
Even if you see a guy who makes you starry eyed at first sight, there's still a chance that you might never develop feelings for him.
I should have mentioned earlier, I have worked around this guy for over a year and so my saying " hi, how are you?" and him answering in monosyllables has gone on for a long time.
It's not like I just met him and instantly concluded that he is shy and reserved and not super confident.
I have never seen him really interact with anyone.
I am most likely to be one of those girls who has a best guy pal and then suddenly one day realizes she is in love with him.
That seems like me.
Tell him he has to ask your brother for permission to ask you out...
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True dat.