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I'm just glad you guys aren't here to find a girlfriend. Because this thread effectively weeded out quite a few of you.
I was thinking the same thing.
I'm just glad you guys aren't here to find a girlfriend. Because this thread effectively weeded out quite a few of you.
I would have preferred it.
What makes you think I'd have to pay for it? Kissinger said that power was the ultimate aphrodisiac (and if that ugly bas was getting any action at all you know that's got to be true). I'm not exactly the secretary of state or anything, but I am in charge of 8 (yeah people, you're reading that right. It's no typo) student workers. So, not to brag or anything, but I'm kind of a big deal. Besides, why do you think that half the girls I hire are wildly incompetent?
I won't say who inspired my management style, but my heroes have always been dentists.
What makes you think I'd have to pay for it? Kissinger said that power was the ultimate aphrodisiac (and if that ugly bas was getting any action at all you know that's got to be true). I'm not exactly the secretary of state or anything, but I am in charge of 8 (yeah people, you're reading that right. It's no typo) student workers. So, not to brag or anything, but I'm kind of a big deal. Besides, why do you think that half the girls I hire are wildly incompetent?
I won't say who inspired my management style, but my heroes have always been dentists.
You literally made me spit water at my keyboard.
You don't believe a 45 year-old man has a high enough sex drive to want it more than 5 times a year? The simple solution is to divorce the , but it sounds like this guy is well enough off that he'd get taken to the cleaners in a divorce. All of you pissy women running your mouths off are acting stupid; there's no way in any man should be satisfied in a marriage where he can't get laid.
No one is claiming he should be satisfied with the situation. We are claiming that his solution to the problem is the wrong course of action.
And it is. And he knows it.
Marriage sometimes (frequently) requires sacrifices and compromises. He is neither sacrificing or compromising. He's simply filling his own needs without regard to the potential harm to his marriage. He's justifying his actions by pretending it makes things better, when it makes the marriage fraudulent.
Marriage sometimes (frequently) requires sacrifices and compromises. She is neither sacrificing nor compromising. She's simply filling her own needs without regard to the potential harm to her marriage. She's justifying her actions by pretending it makes things better, when it makes the marriage fraudulent.
While we are on the subject of men as horrible creatures, it seems very possible that the husband is, how shall I say it, less than sensitive to his wife's needs.
In any case, fault-finding is entertaining, but they need to work on improving their situation, and if that can't be done, ah, well.
I don't think men are horrible creatures ... just that one.
I see what you did there.
Sure, but where did I say that?
Anyway this thread that started essentially as a joke from Chopper is getting way too serious, so I'll stop posting in it.
Beside, high horses scare me.
I'm not claiming she's a saint - no one knows for certain what lengths they have tried to up her libido. She is sleeping with him, by all accounts, though perhaps not with the frequency he would like.
But there is no indication, from what is posted, that she is going outside the marriage and breaking vows and hiding it from him. So where is the biggest problem here?
I'm not saying at all that she is not part of the problem. She may well be. But his actions are almost not part of that issue. What he is doing is wrong, plain and simple. What she is or isn't doing may or may not be wrong - but what he is doing is.
There is no justification for what he is doing (and hiding from his wife) including that he isn't getting laid often enough.
It's too bad. The view from up here is magnificent.
Just wondering, how many of you outraged wimmens thought The Bridges of Madison County was a wonderful movie?
Only getting laid 5 times a year is plenty reason to go outside of one's marriage. I'm guessing she's only with him because of the money factor. Otherwise, why stay with someone you never want to at that age? It's not like they're 65 or something.
But, Shoog... that is, like, so totally different.
I agree the specific situations are different, but a recurring theme in this society (and promoted in the popular culture) is that a guy having an extramarital affair = "heartless cruel dog", while a woman having an extramarital affair = "because her husband is a heartless cruel dog".
I've never seen it.
Never saw it. Sorry.
So, just so I'm clear, all of the folks defending this guy - if a woman has a physical need for intimacy and foreplay that her husband only provides a couple times a year (say for the anniversary and her birthday as a treat)-- and plenty of folks say this is a true emotional and physical need for women -- if her husband doesn't oblige her, she is free to get this intimacy from another source and lie to her husband about her activities?
Or, , forgo the physical need, and say she likes to be held and cuddled, but her husband doesn't do that. So she has an 'emotional affair' with a coworker or colleague. Or pays someone to hold her, but never tells her husband. That's ok too?
I mean, we're naturally assuming here that she brought it up and they went to counseling and the husband was unable or unwilling to change his ways. So her needs aren't being met here.
I just want to make sure I understand.
Because my answer is the same to both - it is wrong.
I don't know if I'd go so far as to suggest that the infrequent sex fully justifies his decision to around on her, but I can certainly understand the frustration.
Considering he's be doing it for eight years, I can't believe that the wife is completely unaware of what's going on. Which can't be helping things much -- I don't know that I'd be terribly eager to my husband more if I knew he was getting some on the side. Between his escorts and her denial, they're both just completely wasting each other's time, which is what I've always thought to be the worst part of infidelity.
Yeah sure. If she tells him what she wants and he doesn't provide it, of course she should go elsewhere.
I think I answered it above, but I think it is equally wrong.
Oh, I got what you were saying and I completely agree.
You couldn't pay me to watch The Bridges of Madison County, for the record. I'd rather scalp myself with a butter knife.
See, then we just flat out disagree. Which is fine! But I think so long as the marriage remains in place, it is wrong to step outside the marriage without the consent of your spouse.
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