Advice Wanted- ( Serious answers please)

[angel_luv]

Well then just TELL him! It's like you think he's already planning a wedding! If you are nice and honest about it, it won't hurt him. Chances are he feels the same way. It just seems to me that in the worst case scenario, this will at least be a learning experience! How else are you going to get dating experience?

I think the real panic set in when my mom told me she thought I was leading the guy on.
It kicked my conscience into super high gear.

Before then I had made peace with just going to go with my friend's advice to go and pay for myself.

[thispego]

I concede that point to an extent.

Everyone has free choice and therefore has to power to choose how they feel and respond to whatever cir stance they are in.

But I do feel I have a responsibility, so far as I am able, to not confuse people by how I behave towards them and to preserve peoples' feeling by what I say to them.

If nothing else you'll be helping him, giving him a little more confidence for the next young lady he wants to ask out. You are not leading him on by going on a date with him, you're both just learning the game. It would be beneficial to both of you actually, Give you both a chance to see what can go right and wrong on a date.

[thispego]

dont pay for yourself, thats bull .

you're not leading him on by letting him pay for you.

He asked you on the date, if you go, he should pay no matter what.

[angel_luv]

And the truth is, I don't really know how he will feel after having dinner with me.

He could think I am boring or too chatty or whatever.

So I plan to just go, pay for myself, and handle the rest when it becomes clear what the rest is.

[angel_luv]

dont pay for yourself, thats bull .

you're not leading him on by letting him pay for you.

He asked you on the date, if you go, he should pay no matter what.

No, paying for myself is the one thing I am sure about.

Since I am not viewing this as a date there is no reason why he should pay for me.

And by my paying for myself, he can have nothing to begrudge me for later.

I took the time out of my schedule to get to know him at my own expense.
And if I say no to going out with him again, that would be within my rights to do so.

[mrsmaalox]

And the truth is, I don't really know how he will feel after having dinner with me.

He could think I am boring or too chatty or whatever.

So I plan to just go, pay for myself, and handle the rest when it becomes clear what the rest is.

Well sounds like we have a plan!
(And maybe stop reading this thread; I can't see how so many different opinions, serious and non-serious, can possibly be comforting! )

[angel_luv]

This thread is very helpful.

I've had the benefit of so many points of view, all of which have helped me work through a ton of jitters and decide how I want to proceed.

Thanks guys! Really, thanks!

[ATRAIN]

No, paying for myself is the one thing I am sure about.

Since I am not viewing this as a date there is no reason why he should pay for me.

And by my paying for myself, he can have nothing to begrudge me for later.

I took the time out of my schedule to get to know him at my own expense.
And if I say no to going out with him again, that would be within my rights to do so.

How about you and I go out on a dinner date and you pay . Don't worry im cool about the whole just friends thing hahahaha. If I think your too chatty ill just tell myself, "Just be nice and listen she is paying "

[angel_luv]

Thanks Mrs. Maalox!

[angel_luv]

How about you and I go out on a dinner date and you pay . Don't worry im cool about the whole just friends thing hahahaha.

How about no.

Look guys, I didn't want to go out with him and I said no!


Sorry Atrain. Could not resist.

[ATRAIN]

How about no.

Look guys, I didn't want to go out with him and I said no!


Sorry Atrain. Could not resist.

You see all the helpful advice DID work. Your well on your way.

[angel_luv]

[thispego]

No, paying for myself is the one thing I am sure about.

Since I am not viewing this as a date there is no reason why he should pay for me.

And by my paying for myself, he can have nothing to begrudge me for later.

I took the time out of my schedule to get to know him at my own expense.
And if I say no to going out with him again, that would be within my rights to do so.

And you would not be within your right to say no to a second date if he paid for the first one?

He could begrudge you for not letting him pay. Anyways, you paying for yourself could create an akward moment, luckily that will be at the end of the date so you won't really have to deal with it... As long as you follow through with your commitment I don't think there is a lot he could be upset about. And you can walk away from it knowing that just maybe you helped boost his confidence a little bit.

[angel_luv]

I was actually going to clarify when he calls that I want to go dutch.
If he seriously objects to that, then he can cancel on me.

[MannyIsGod]

I was really tempted to break my troll cherry on "Angel Luv's Date" but I decided not to enter the Dark Side.

Someone make me proud.

[Dark Gable]

I was really tempted to break my troll cherry on "Angel Luv's Date" but I decided not to enter the Dark Side.

Someone make me proud.

What is wrong with the Dark Side?

[angel_luv]

I was really tempted to break my troll cherry on "Angel Luv's Date" but I decided not to enter the Dark Side.

Someone make me proud.

Good job, although you would be a great troll since you have an intelligent sense of humor.

[Man of Steel]

The guy is not bad looking- has some nice features and is certainly not ugly.

Appearance is not what gets my interest. I am attracted to charisma and humor, strength and confidence. If a guy is those things, there is an excellent chance I will think he is cute.

On the other hand, you can be a Brad Pitt look alike but if I think you are either arrogant or timid, I'm not going to dig you.

I think the issue with this situation is that when he asked me out he was thinking date and when I said yes I was thinking " How nice, conversation."
And then after I said yes, I realized, " Oh gosh... he thinks date." thus my panic.

It was a misunderstanding which I need to clear up.

Damn Angel--I am a little timid and was thinking of asking you out, too.

Oh well--guess I'll have to the Palace again tonight.

--Love,

Brad

[MannyIsGod]

Good job, although you would be a great troll since you have an intelligent sense of humor.

Well thank you!

[Southwest Texas Fan]

I don't know if it has been suggested but go out to lunch and not dinner. Lunch usually means friendship whereas the latter would suggest a romantic interest. But if you have a gut feeling about his guy maybe you should cancel. Regardless of the reasons sometimes it's better to be safe than sorry.

[George Gervin's Afro]

Tell him the reason why you broke up with your last boyfriend is because he had big dik and he didn't know how to use it.. then ask him what he wants to do.. he will NEVER call again... or look at you for that matter...

[CuckingFunt]

Wow, that's kind of what I said, only I didn't cringe when I re-read my post. Yikes.

I've read this twice, and I still don't get why Katy's post would make anyone cringe.

[CuckingFunt]

I don't see how that is childish but rather is a mature regard and concern for other people.

Mature is being honest with him from the start.

Just sayin'.

[spursfan09]

You dont have to worry about him. that's the beauty of it. His feelings are not your responsilbity.

Exactly!

[Duff McCartney]

You think too much. If the guy knew you had so much confusion about just dinner, he'd probably tell you no. I know I would.

It's just dinner..it's not a freaking marriage proposal.