League sources told EPSN.com on Wednesday night that "only one team" is considering a bid for Bill Buckner and that the 68-year-old "can't believe" he is about to play his first game in the NBA.
Buckner, at this stage of his life, doesn't have a noticable vertical leap and has two transplanted knees. A Red Sox fan once described Buckner as "that Focker who didn't bend ovah for da baseball and I won't be happy until I see his caucus hanging in hawvad yawd."
After unexpectedly emerging as a player the Spurs were eyeing, the 6-foot-1, 280-pounder also holds appeal because the Spurs believe he can fit right in with Karl Malone and Clifford Robinson, especially when it comes to the playoffs.
Lucifer has shown interest in Buckner for weeks, even before he received a ticket for not using his left blinker whilst making a left turn. It remains to be seen if Lucifer is planning an untimely death or whether he'll let him die of natural causes, but sources say Lucifer is busy trying to arrange the acquisition of his new number one prospect Hakeem Olajuwon.
The Pearly Gates, Limbo and Allah are also among the interested, according to sources. Allah has been particularly active in the search for caucasian depth, but it's believed he'll have to up the proposed deal of 21 virgins.
Yet with Malone unsure if he wants to make another le run or impregnate a 12 year old again, and with Philadelphia said to be increasingly reluctant to move anyone on the Eagles, Buckner could become their best option. The Spurs, also looking to rape the tax payers of even more money, have had veteran forward Malik Rose on the trading block since last season because he makes over the league minimum, which creates the possibility of a Rose-for-Buckner swap if the Park Avenue Retirement Home is willing to absorb Rose's contract.
Mark Stien is the senior NBA writer for EPSN.com. To e-mail him, click here. Also, click here to send a question for possible use on EPSNEWS.
I guess the fact that San Antonio spent over 110 million this summer on two players doesn't count for much...........
F-A-I-R-W-E-A-T-H-E-R
@ timvp
So does this mean Malone is out
So ing what? man someone had to remind Holt Cat et al to not be such cheap bas s that they would let a Tony Parker walk over a significantly less than max contract.
you timvp!!!
You would have to remind me of 1986.
Sweet!! Maybe at 280 he could be good for six hard fouls on Shaq!
Pull the f'n trigger Pop!
Funny stuff, timVP.
Wilt's been dead a few years, but even shriveled up in formaldehyde, he's probably would stand a good 6'9", 6'10" if we propped him up.
Plus, throw him a pass on the baseline and there is a least an infinitesimal chance he'd move his feet to catch it.
Clever, timveep.
Don't forget Charles Barkley. He's available and needs a Championship Ring.
This is actually very cool. Spurs are so confident in a le that they can invite all the losers of the past to join them for that final shot at a ring.
What's Guy V. Lewis up to?
Don't forget Charles Barkley. He's available and needs a Championship Ring.
I'm sure he would love pairing up with Ginnnnnobiliiiiiiiii.....!!!!!!!!!!
Fairweather? The Spurs are the best team in the league and I can still be critical of them. Unlike you, I don't just come in here after a loss and spew nonsense.
The Spurs are being cheap. You either have to be blind or stupid to not figure that out.
This is the only statement I have a problem with.The Spurs, also looking to rape the tax payers of even more money,
I dont think the Spurs have ever asked for tax payer money to fund anything.
The SBC was on TOURIST money.
Really? Every person taht came to town as a tourist was charged at the limits?
Oh wait, no, it was a TAX. D'oh!
You trying to kill me? That was freaking hilarious...
Really? Every person taht came to town as a tourist was charged at the limits?
Oh wait, no, it was a TAX. D'oh!
Hotel Motel rental car tax.
Once again, how were SAN ANTONIO tax payers made to pay this.
If you rented a hotel, or car, you paid.
Much rather have my money go to that, than an idiotic government program.
You mean to tell me no resident of San Antonio has ever paid for a hotel room here ...
Or paid the extra .10% county sales tax ... or......
...or rented a car to drive to said hotel
Hotel . . . Motel . . . Holiday Inn!
The No-Tell Motel....
It was either do that, or loose the team.
I think intelligently we went with keeping the team here.
That and the rodeo gets more revenue to give out in scholarships.
Win win.
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