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  1. #1
    Murdering Prostitutes Findog's Avatar
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    I bought a bag of weed from my dirtbag cousin. It wasn't high-quality stuff, in fact it was barely worth smoking, like 3 bowls just to feel a buzz...so the following doesn't make me too upset. Anyways, last night I smoked three bowls, rubbed one out, and went to bed. I'm laying there in the dark, and I can hear this helicopter. It doesn't go away, in fact it gets louder and louder.

    After about 15 minutes of this constantly circling helicopter, it gets so loud that it has to be circling directly over my apt building. I look out the window and I can see floodlights, three squad cars...so I panicked and flushed all of my weed down the toilet. It was about an ounce total. I paid $30 for what is admittedly crappy weed and only really works as a placebo effect, but still...

    I was too stoned, half-awake and paranoid to realize that:

    A) the copter wasn't circling overhead on account of my weed that was being smoked in the privacy of my own residence. They only pull that out when they have bigger fish to fry.

    B) even if the cops had entered my apt, they would've still found my paraphenalia, and I would've gone to jail anyways on account of that

    C) it wasn't enough to be felony possession, so see item B on the futility of flushing it

    D) All I really had to do was put it up and make sure it wasn't in plain sight on the extremely miniscule chance the police entered my residence.

    Now, it was of extremely poor quality, so I think subconsciously I was thinking that crappy weed wasn't worth going to jail for, but I remember waking up this morning and thinking "It sure would be nice to smoke a bowl. I totally dreamed the scary helicopter flashing the floodlights and me flushing my stash, right? There's no way that actually happened."

  2. #2
    I'm Mavs>Spurs bitch Allanon's Avatar
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    I totally dreamed the scary helicopter flashing the floodlights and me flushing my stash,
    That was obviously much better than you give it credit for.

  3. #3
    Murdering Prostitutes Findog's Avatar
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    "I immediately regret this decision!"

  4. #4
    Luck the Fakers Bob Lanier's Avatar
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    Dumbasses tend to be dumbasses.

  5. #5
    Believe. Zee Laker's Avatar
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    That was obviously much better than you give it credit for.

    +1


  6. #6
    Spur Forever urunobili's Avatar
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    troll forum fodder

  7. #7
    5. timvp's Avatar
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    Where's the part where you faint in the shower?

  8. #8
    The Wemby Assembly z0sa's Avatar
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    a 30 dollar ounce? You're better off without it.

  9. #9
    Murdering Prostitutes Findog's Avatar
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    a 30 dollar ounce? You're better off without it.
    Yeah, but what is up with the fact that high-quality weed is almost impossible to come by in Texas nowadays? Everytime I go to my cousin's trailer, he's got bricks of weed in his fridge, but it's all crappy schwag. Did 9/11 make it harder for to get across the border?

  10. #10
    Copacetic m33p0's Avatar
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    Yeah, but what is up with the fact that high-quality weed is almost impossible to come by in Texas nowadays? Everytime I go to my cousin's trailer, he's got bricks of weed in his fridge, but it's all crappy schwag. Did 9/11 make it harder for to get across the border?
    JHo has been hoarding them.
    sorry, couldn't resist.

  11. #11
    I cannot grok its fullnes leemajors's Avatar
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    Yeah, but what is up with the fact that high-quality weed is almost impossible to come by in Texas nowadays? Everytime I go to my cousin's trailer, he's got bricks of weed in his fridge, but it's all crappy schwag. Did 9/11 make it harder for to get across the border?
    not having too much trouble in austin

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