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You are all in our prayers
For a week now I have been having sharp, stabbing like pains in my head. At the top of my head, where what I call my "hair swirl" I get sudden sharp pains that last for a couple seconds at a time, at least 20 times a day.
I just got an appointment for next Monday to see what's going on. I'll probably have to get an MRI and MRA to actually rule out my worst fears of a brain tumor, abscess, or aneurism. I have done several hours worth of research on the things it could be. So many different possibilities that it really does me no good. It just makes my anxiety worse.
My mother suffers from fibromyalgia, something spell-check can't even comprehend. It runs in the family, however my symptoms do not seem to have any relation.
To say I am scared and nervous of suddenly falling over dead would be very accurate. I know I shouldn't stress but I already have a lot of stress having my hours at work screwed with every week trying to support my 11 month old girl whom shares a birthday with me that is coming up November 3rd.
I am only 26. But I had a friend in my teenage years who's father died at 28 from a brain tumor. I have suffered from depression for years, and when I was a teenager was put on Zoloft. That lasted a month, and caused* me to have suicidal thoughts and make everything worse. Since then I have been afraid of doctors, and haven't seen one in 11 years.
I had a lymphoid removed, or so I thought, when I was just 6 under my right arm. It had swollen to the size of an orange and luckily I had no complications other than a muscle having to be removed cause of the infection. Well, it's been back for 2 years now, and I have played the "I'll be fine" game for too long.
I guess I am just really stressed out and scared. Not sure why I am posting this. I have recently became a god-fearing person, but I wouldn't say I am a christian. As I was just typing the pain just shot through my head as if someone took a knife and cut my crown wide open. It makes me freeze up and cringe really bad.
I really hope it's nothing serious, I know I have bad anxiety, I never needed a doctor to tell me this. But I have a little one that depends on me to make it in this world and I cannot fail her. I guess that stresses me out the most. That and my heath insurance through my work does not cover anything hardly, it's terrible heath insurance but it's all I have. I already have money problems and if I know my arm needs to be operated on again, but I just don't want to go into more debt and sink myself in a hole when I have been trying to put money back out of every paycheck for my daughter.
I'm long winded, and I'll shut up. A lot of people have it so bad in this world and I feel like a fool for even saying anything. But if you pray, add Dewayne in Arkansas to your list if you don't mind.
Last edited by Brutalis; 10-03-2011 at 07:44 PM.
You are all in our prayers
x2You are all in our prayers
stay strong for your little girl
Thanks. I know my worry is premature, but I've always had bad anxiety that I never have done anything about. To the ones on ST I do not get along with, lay off me on this subject please. I don't hate any one single person or wish anything bad on anyone, it's just the internet in the end.
I thought of Kindergarten Cop too.
Damn. You're in my prayers, Brutalis.
Make sure you keep your Dr.'s appointment and don't wait 11 years to go next time. Best wishes.
Thanks bro.
Agreed. I have been very ignorant for too long.
Keeping you in my prayers. There are so many things that go in your head that it could be nothing, but it could be something. I freaked out a ton when I had my last seizure...there wasn't anything wrong with me. Just random....so hang in there!
and oh my goodness. Love Kindergarten Cop.
Take care, man. Definitely pullin' for you and yours.
Jeezus Ashbeeigh.
Good luck buddy!
I know this is a lot easier said than done,but the best thing for you to do is to stop looking up stuff on the net in reference to your current situation.All that is gonna do is add more stress that you do not need.I sincerely hope everything works out for you man.Keep us updated.
Sounds pretty bad. My bad for the negative thinking but obviously hope for the best but plan for the worst. The only way I can see doing that is getting a better health insurance. I know you said your job has crap health insurance and you were strapped for cash. But the way I see it is you haven't been to a Dr in a long time right? If you go to an appointment and they find something that requires a lot more attention...then? I doubt you will be able to get another insurance to help you with the cost. Or maybe that doesn't even matter since the cash flow and all. Just saying I guess. ...I was just thinking on what I would do for my kid. Either way hope its nothing so you can raise that kid to be a loud annoying spurs fan.
^ made me think of something. Not that you should put off your doctor vist but you might check into getting a term life insurance policy before getting diagnosed. For large amounts, they'd probably send someone to your house to do a short physical and take some blood. They might miss many of the things you mentioned. If something was wrong, god forbid, you could at least set your daughter up financially.
I can guarantee you it's not "nothing." Pains like that don't happen for no reason. At any rate I hope you get it taken care of for your daughter's sake at least. Best wishes man
And remember being dead <<< being in debt. You'll never be thrown in jail for unpaid debts bro, so keep that in mind
Good luck Brah, if you can't play the league matched it's okay. We understand, hope all goes well and that you're just worrying over nothing
Unless it's to the IRS or child support then all bets are off.
Hang in there. Don't preconceive issues that don't exist. Stress is a big problem and you can worry yourself sick (literally).
A brain tumor would likely be more than just pain. It would involve nausea, vomiting, maybe a balance issue and perhaps blurred vision or speech impairment.
Hopefully you just have headaches that can be treated.
Yes they do, at least no reason that can be pinpointed. Ever heard of icepick headaches? (not a real icepick...)I can guarantee you it's not "nothing." Pains like that don't happen for no reason. At any rate I hope you get it taken care of for your daughter's sake at least. Best wishes man
good luck man
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