Reply With Quote
Here's a few email addresses:
[email protected]
[email protected]
[email protected]
I couldn't find this guys email, but I know people here will have fun with this one way or another.
Spurs are NBA chumps
The champs proved one thing: they're the worst of the best
By Eliav Applebaum/Sports Writer
Sound the trumpets, open the drawbridge, unleash the catapults and let the ranting begin. The greatest game on this planet has been tainted by the San Antonio Spurs.
I kept my cool as the news media from 206 countries tried, unsuccessfully, to hype a mediocre NBA Finals series. It felt more like a six-year old's birthday party caught on home video instead of "Clash of the ans" at the multiplex.
The Spurs aren't great. They're not even that good. They're passable. Adequate. Marginal. Boring. Insufferable. The Chicago Bulls of Michael Jordan's reign would toss San Antonio into a vat of boiling water and dance in circles around the chumps before closely examining the wine list.
These San Antonio Spurs are the worst NBA champions of all time.
They're your 2005 NBA chumps. There. I said it.
Not only were they plodding, they had less intrigue than a Ricky Williams' journal entry from a wild weekend in Miami Beach.
Give me meerkats on Animal Planet. Give me horse flies mating. Give me paint drying. But don't give me the Spurs winning anything.
And before I go any further into the rant, let me make this much clear: I have nothing against any of the individual Spurs personally.
I enjoying taking unnecessary jabs at athletes making oodles of money for putting a little orange ball in a hoop, running up and down a 90-foot slab of wood and treating the rest of the world like a case of the bubonic plague. Cough. Latrell Sprewell. Cough.
The rant is all in the name of fun.
Tim Duncan has less sex appeal than Ozzy Osbourne performing his metal rendition of "Let's Get It On."
Manu Ginobli reminds me of a sniveling Andy Garcia in "Oceans Eleven." I couldn't like the guy, even if he was handing me a roll of $20 bills for checking his luggage at curbside check-in. There were about 347 times during the playoffs that I felt like flicking Ginobli's ears.
Tony Parker is French and he's dating Eva Longoria, two reasons to dislike him. It's freedom fries, right?
Rasho Nesterovic looks like the Pillsbury Dough Boy was hit with an ugly stick. Playing next to Duncan, he still couldn't keep his starting gig from ... Nazr Mohammed? All "Rash" needed to do was stand on his tippy-toes and stick his hands high in the air.
The rest of the bunch? They're less distinctive than the wallpaper in the Chevron can off the I-5 in Santa Clarita. You think anybody's going to recite haiku about Beno Udrih in 20 years? Me neither.
The worst part of the whole deal? Robert "Big Shot Blob" Horry now has as many championship rings - six - as Jordan. What a shame. He's a schlub fortunate enough to be in the right place at the right time. He's played with Hakeem Olajuwon, David Robinson, Shaquille O'Neal, Kobe Bryant and Tim Duncan in their prime.
These Spurs barely defeated an exhausted Detroit Pistons squad that waddled through the regular season before wheezing and stumbling through the playoffs like geriatric gymnasts. The Spurs couldn't finish Detroit at home in Game 6, a game they should have won with their eyes closed, hands tied behind their back and Bob Knight screaming obscenities in their ears.
Is that the sign of a champion? That's the sign of a reluctant, weak, undeserving champion. The San Antonio Spurs deserve the 2005 NBA championship banner like Mike Tyson deserves another chance boxing on Pay-Per-View.
I like the NBA. Really, I do. And I love basketball. But I want to see more teams employ the Run-'N'-Gun offense. I want at udes, big hair, intense personal rivalries and nasty tomahawk dunks that reinvent the word "posterize."
I want Kevin Garnett, after posting a triple-double on the Lakers - because nobody outside of L.A. likes the Lakers - complimenting TNT sideline reporter Craig Sager for his hideous canary-yellow suit.
I want less talk, more rock.
I want the NBA that I grew up watching. But what I really want for 2005-06 season... the Bulls to win it all.
Hey, a man can dream. And insult the Spurs.
The author is a sports writer for The Reporter.
http://www.thereporter.com/extrapoints
Here's a few email addresses:
[email protected]
[email protected]
[email protected]
Eliav?
The 'freedom fries' crack automatically disqualifies him. I say we send him to the nearest recruiters. There's no reason we're losing some of the best of a generation and this twit is back home with his computer.
Once again, another idiot who can't even get his basic facts straight:
I missed those games where Horry played with D-Rob.The worst part of the whole deal? Robert "Big Shot Blob" Horry now has as many championship rings - six - as Jordan. What a shame. He's a schlub fortunate enough to be in the right place at the right time. He's played with Hakeem Olajuwon, David Robinson, Shaquille O'Neal, Kobe Bryant and Tim Duncan in their prime.
Yeah, it was at about that point that I stopped reading.I missed those games where Horry played with D-Rob.
Yeah, you have to love it when the fact checkers for a paper get their straight. JohnnyBlaze will prorbably have a good deal to say about that.
This dude is still stuck in the past when Jordan and the bulls were on a roll
Sooooo, we suck??? or we are so good that we should have beat the defending champs with our hands tied behind our backs???
what a fool
There are 2 reasons why a basketball fan would not like this year's Spurs as NBA champs.
1. Plain jealousy and prejudice
2. He likes controversy and flashy play and does not appreciate the intricate details that make the game so enjoyable (what has Duncan's sex appeal got to do with how good NBA Champs the Spurs are?)
I laughed hard at the quote he made about how the Spurs should have won game 6 easily, "with their eyes closed, hands tied behind their back". This was virtually the same Detroit team that whipped Shaq, Kobe and co.'s asses just 12 months ago. Even the Bulls at their best (97?) would not have been able to beat the Pistons that easily.
This guy is probably one of those who put a big fat wager on the fat man and Miami winning the NBA Championship and is trying to justify his choice by saying the Spurs aren't worthy champions.
seriosuly, i think this writer should consider covering a different sport during the offseason, because he apparently is struggling for material
T-Park, did you write this article?
I suppose that anyone writing a commentary has a right to have it printed, but I would not call this "reporting".
It's not reporting. It's an asshole's "fun" opinion, trying to be famous, and read, for being a whiny, vicious asshole, just like attention T_Park.
i used to have a burning hatred for the lakers...
but now? you can't help but point and laugh...
they are a pretty boring team to watch...
Well, maybe this guy has been hanging out with Phil Jackson in Montana
Vacaville?
Wow.
Uno
Dos
Tres
Suck it.
Sincerely,
San Antonio
The article has absolutely no substance. This idiot wants to ramble about why he thinks the spurs are nba chumps, but is directing his premise on race and appeal. Give me a break. What does being french or having appeal have to do with the actual game of bball. Outside of bball you can have whatever opinion you want about a player(s). This guy (Eliav???) wants a Run-Gun offense. Where was he in the pheonix series? Spurs are built on defense and the end result of some games are seen as "boring.". Not to me. It's called championship basketball. If this dude is still writing articles on the nba next year, he'll eat major crow. SPURS CHAMPS 06. A bit premature, but media idiots need to eat crow.
That was God-awful.
RACK MB. Sweet!
which one is his?
I wouldn't bother e-mailing him- he is not worth it.
I have done my part and sent this bag an email claiming that these Spurs would kill the 72 win Bulls!
Must have been a slow news day and didn't and couldn't get any even if you paid for it.
The Spurs are laughing all the way to the bank and enjoying their summer vacations at locations we could only dream of going.
Here's to you a-hole go watch WWF and jack off there's your excitement. Whatever dude.
There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)
Posting Permissions
