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False. I've lost weight and still didn't find sex.
The New York Times
October 17, 2005
Losing Weight Can Mean Gaining a Sex Life
By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
Filed at 7:27 p.m. ET
VANCOUVER, British Columbia (AP) -- Losing a little weight can do wonders for your sex life. So says Duke University psychologist Martin Binks, who presented a study Monday at a meeting of The Obesity Society showing that shedding a few pounds can improve things in the bedroom by making people feel better about their bodies.
''You reap a lot of benefit from a moderate weight loss of 10 percent,'' Binks said. ''It's a wonderful message. You don't have to reach some ideal weight to be healthy and happy.''
It is one of the few studies to examine the mental and emotional problems that obesity can cause for intimacy, not just the physical troubles such as hormone imbalances or impotence.
''There has not been a lot of research in this area,'' said Dr. Susan Yanovski, director of obesity research at the National Ins ute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases. Improving your sex life ''would be another good reason to lose weight if you're obese.''
The study involved 161 women and 26 men, average age 45, with an average body mass index of 41. (A score of 30 or above on this height-and-weight formula is considered obese).
All were enrolled in a diet program at the Hennepin County Medical Center in Minneapolis and had lost 17.5 percent of their body weight after one year and 13 percent after two years. (They regained some of the pounds they initially shed).
They answered questions about the quality of their sex lives when the study began and every three months thereafter. The most striking improvement in at udes was seen at three months, when they had lost about 12 percent of their initial weight.
At the outset, 68 percent of women said they felt sexually unattractive. One year into the diet, only 26 percent did. About 63 percent originally did not want to be seen undressed, but only 34 percent felt that way a year later.
Initially, 21 percent of women said they were not enjoying sex; only 11 percent said so after one year.
''The number of males in the study does limit what we can say about men,'' but feelings of unattractiveness and unwillingness to be seen naked also applied to them, Binks said. Even when many of them wanted to have sex, the excess weight made it an ordeal.
''They'll tell us about simple mechanical difficulty,'' Binks said.
That certainly was true of Carlene Wellington, 62, and her husband, Gary, 63, of suburban Tacoma, Wash. Both were a healthy weight when they married 42 years ago, until she started to ''show love'' by cooking massive amounts of food. She and her husband ballooned to 237 and 355 pounds, respectively, and their sex life suffered.
''We had about 600 pounds in our bed,'' she said.
''I called it my workbench,'' because sex was so physically difficult, he said.
Carlene Wellington was embarrassed by her body.
''I could get dressed without showing any skin,'' and had to have the lights off when they had sex, she said. During sex, she often felt pressure in her chest, caused by anxiety and dread.
She now weighs 153 pounds, and her tall husband a trim 235. ''It's just like being married to a different person, or going back 25 years,'' she said.
Her husband recalled the day 13 years ago -- after the couple had just lost a combined 200 pounds -- when he looked at wife one morning and told her she had a cute butt.
''I don't know if she thought I was trying to make her late for work or not,'' he said. But he was struck by how much he wanted to.
The Wellingtons are leaders in their local chapter of TOPS, or Take Off Pounds Sensibly, an international support group that had a display at the obesity conference in Vancouver.
The prospect of a better sex life could motivate some overweight people to shed pounds, said Dr. Ahmed Kissebah, an obesity expert at the Medical College of Wisconsin in Milwaukee and medical adviser to TOPS.
In overweight young women in particular, ''We see some form of frigidity. They're afraid of interacting'' physically, Kissebah said.
Binks said: ''We are encouraging health care providers to open the atmosphere and encourage conversations'' about these issues.
Gary Wellington said such openness would help.
''The term 'love is blind' is true,'' he said. But now that he and his wife have both lost weight, ''things work better,'' and sex is again a joy, he said.
^------
On the Net:
Obesity meeting: www.naaso.org
* Copyright 2005 The Associated Press
False. I've lost weight and still didn't find sex.
i knew a chick who was like 350lbs...she had gastro bypass surgery and then divorced her husband and became a !
this chick lost like 150lbs... it was crazy...then she had surgery to get rid of the excess skin...
well Ive made additions and reductions and my sex life has increased by 100%. Thats the good news. The bad news is that 100% of 0 is still, well, 0.
"Worked for me!"
Ha hah a ha, thats funny you dont need to lose weight to have a sex life, but it helps for fat people i suppose
i think it;s the going to hte gym nad working out , gettign all worked up and sweaty that increases the total amount of sex.
not necesarily the weight loss it;s self.
Emo and I used to work out together after work and we almost ALWAYS had sex as soon as we got home.
I think it's true. I had some real physical intimacy issues going into my current relationship. I'm overweight, and have been for years - I have an eating disorder, which is largely under control now, but . . . I feel really unattractive sometimes. When you hate your body and they way you look and feel, it's very difficult to believe anyone else would find it attractive - and if they don't find you attractive, why would they want to have sex with you? It's probably a control issue, or they are using you. It can span out of control really quickly. And the bottom line is that if you are feeling unattractive and worried about how your body is presenting, then it's VERY difficult to relax and get in the mood and enjoy sex.
If someone is overweight, we are probably talking in the 200-300 pound range, right? So 10% of the body weight is a good 20-30 pounds, which is indeed one of the most euphoric periods of weight loss. You've made a real, true, visible difference in your body - it's not just water weight or loss of muscle tone, the reduction in weight and the fitness to get there make you lighter and healthier, and overall, due to the right amount of excersise and good foods, you FEEL good. So you are going to look better, feel better, and have a better at ude, which is always attractive.
And THAT right there will improve your sex life. Which is why I expect it's more easily evidenced in women than men - a lot of sex/intimacy for women is bound up in self image.
I see big people going home with other people at Cooleros all the time.
I've dropped about 40-50 pounds. If you're not some fat ude that sweats walking up three flights of stairs, chanches are women won't be grossed out by you. That's hard-hitting stuff NYT.
I say true. People are funny like that. I know a women who are overweight and those who aren't. I have noticed that the women who are overweight don't have the same confidence as those who aren't.
thispego said after he lost 30 pounds of his beer belly that his sex life became great
that's why i love my hands...they love me no matter what.
it's TRUE love.
:vomitthat's why i love my hands...they love me no matter what.
it's TRUE love.
I don't think that it matters. Its all in your personality and social skills. I know a lot of gorgeous, skinny peopel who don't get it that often at all and a lot of overweight people who get sex all the time...
No one knows how to do you better than you do.that's why i love my hands...they love me no matter what.
it's TRUE love.
I've been working out for nearly 5 years, so far I haven't hit anything except my hand and my pillow.........what gives?
I'm trying to lose some lbs and get back to my Adonis days.
Over 600 lbs on one mattress...That Sealy Posture Pedic Engineer should get some sort of humanitarian award for designing such a phenomenal product...
Also...Think of the new possibilities this opens up for big-boned models... (Hey that 600 couple....got a new bed we would like them to test, just one is available today... OK send him over...)
All losing weight does is boost your confidence, thats it, you dont have to be a damn physically fit person to score all the time. Its all in peoples swagger, when you talk to someone or go with intentions on picking someone up you have to have that confidence in yourself, most women can sense that....just dont be over confident...that kinda kills the attraction...make sure you say the right things and you listen its imparitive that you listen and boom i gurantee instant booty......or you can always just go with the picking up drunk girls bit....
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