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  1. #1
    I LIKE THEM BOOTY'S batman2883's Avatar
    Location
    San Antonio
    Post Count
    19,311
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    How To Shower Like a Woman:

    Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.

    If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

    Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

    Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

    Wash your hair once with cu ber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

    Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

    Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with real passion fruit. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

    Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

    Rinse conditioner off hair.

    Shave armpits and legs.

    Turn off shower.

    Squeegee all wet surfaces in shower.

    Spray mold spots with Tilex.

    Get out of shower and stand on bathmat.

    Dry with towel the size of a small country.

    Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

    Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.



    How To Shower Like a Man:



    Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. Walk naked to the bathroom.

    If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the
    'woo-woo' sound.

    Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

    Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.

    Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits.

    Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

    Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

    Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
    Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
    Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. Pee.
    Rinse off and get out of shower. Avoid bathmat.

    Dry off forearms and butt only.

    Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.

    Admire wiener size in mirror again. Shake it to watch water fly off.

    Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
    Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

    If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again. Throw wet towel on bed.



    If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something so very wrong with you.

    Have a great day! And, "woo woo"!!!

  2. #2
    I LIKE THEM BOOTY'S batman2883's Avatar
    Location
    San Antonio
    Post Count
    19,311
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Damn My Sig Is Hot^

  3. #3
    I love the 80's! Old School Chic's Avatar
    Post Count
    4,389
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Damn My Sig Is Hot^

    Your Sig Is mean looking!

  4. #4
    Mrs.Useruser666 SpursWoman's Avatar
    Name
    Christy
    Post Count
    27,173
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the
    'woo-woo' sound.

    I really hate that.

  5. #5
    Black Magic Duncan21's Avatar
    Location
    Arklow, Rep. of Ireland
    Post Count
    1,321
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    lol, thats all so true

  6. #6
    Regia TOP-CHERRY's Avatar
    Post Count
    6,785
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Damn. I need more shower accessories.

  7. #7
    I love the 80's! Old School Chic's Avatar
    Post Count
    4,389
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Damn. I need more shower accessories.


  8. #8
    <><><><><><> ALVAREZ6's Avatar
    Post Count
    20,267
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs

  9. #9
    Bruce Bowen 2.0 Horry For 3!'s Avatar
    Name
    Josh
    Location
    Willis, Texas
    Post Count
    18,446
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    College
    Texas Longhorns
    Most of the stuff is true for me

  10. #10
    I LIKE THEM BOOTY'S batman2883's Avatar
    Location
    San Antonio
    Post Count
    19,311
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    woo woo

  11. #11
    The Kiwi Connection NZHayden's Avatar
    Location
    New Zealand
    Post Count
    1,951
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    thats a good one batman

  12. #12
    I LIKE THEM BOOTY'S batman2883's Avatar
    Location
    San Antonio
    Post Count
    19,311
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    what can i say im full of one hit wonders

  13. #13
    Too weird to live, and too rare to die. midgetonadonkey's Avatar
    Post Count
    23,737
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Most of the stuff is true for me
    The female part?

  14. #14
    That's what she said. LuvBones's Avatar
    Location
    San Antonio, Tx
    Post Count
    2,183
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    What? No one listens to music and sings in the shower?

  15. #15
    Bad Kitty Gatita's Avatar
    Post Count
    2,790
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs


    Shaking the wiener!!!

    Damn you Ed!!!

  16. #16
    I come in Marklar. Marklar MM's Avatar
    Location
    In a garbage can next to Oscar. To be more specific, I live in the suburbs of Detroit.
    Post Count
    6,214
    NBA Team
    Detroit Pistons
    Ga a...That tampon thing is like....EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. Some girl did that in school a couple years ago. I like your Virgins pringle one though.

  17. #17
    Bad Kitty Gatita's Avatar
    Post Count
    2,790
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    Ga a...That tampon thing is like....EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. Some girl did that in school a couple years ago. I like your Virgins pringle one though.
    I must admit.

    It is nasty. :vomit

    Its for shock value.



    BTW, did that girl fling it at someone?!

  18. #18
    I come in Marklar. Marklar MM's Avatar
    Location
    In a garbage can next to Oscar. To be more specific, I live in the suburbs of Detroit.
    Post Count
    6,214
    NBA Team
    Detroit Pistons
    I must admit.

    It is nasty. :vomit

    Its for shock value.



    BTW, did that girl fling it at someone?!

    Don't really know...it was just on the floor. But I am sure it had to have gotten there somehow. Hmmm....

  19. #19
    Bruce Bowen 2.0 Horry For 3!'s Avatar
    Name
    Josh
    Location
    Willis, Texas
    Post Count
    18,446
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    College
    Texas Longhorns
    I knew you would say something stupid

  20. #20
    It's In The Numbers 1369's Avatar
    Location
    San Antonio, Texas
    Post Count
    5,138
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    From reading from the above, suffice it to say, deductive reasoning says batman2883 has never been laid...

  21. #21
    Believe. CoolArrow's Avatar
    Post Count
    98
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    They left off "cranking one off" for the guys in the shower.

  22. #22
    Bad Kitty Gatita's Avatar
    Post Count
    2,790
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    They left off "cranking one off" for the guys in the shower.

    From reading from the above, suffice it to say, deductive reasoning says batman2883 has never been laid...

  23. #23
    SpursTalk Sneakerhead KEDA's Avatar
    Location
    San Antonio
    Post Count
    4,916
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    I dont pee in the shower, thats nasty.

  24. #24
    RIP whottt. slayermin's Avatar
    Location
    The Great City of San Antonio
    Post Count
    5,011
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    College
    USC Trojans
    I have read this before, somewhere. But I don't recall where.

  25. #25
    Name you'd love to touch maxpower's Avatar
    Post Count
    1,454
    NBA Team
    San Antonio Spurs
    I dont pee in the shower, thats nasty.


    It's all pipes!


    oh yeah.

    woo woo!!

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