Those of you like me who work in direct contact with the general public understand where I will be coming from with this.
I have a theory...no matter how proficient someone is in his or her chosen profession, when they become a consumer, that person's IQ drops about 30% depending on the person.
Some of the things I have been asked in my dealings with the public:
Me in 1989: "Pizza Hut Delivery, this is Mike, how may I help you?"
The responses: "is this Pizza Hut?" or "do you deliver?" or "what number do I call for delivery?" (on the last one, I gave that person the number he just called. He hung up..and called back on the same number!)
My favorite happened recently.
I answered the phone here at work and the person calling asked to speak with one of our agents. I informed him that she was out of the office, he then asked for a different agent who was on the phone at the time..he then asked me...
"do you work there?" Not "Can you help me?" or "Are you an agent?" but "do you work there?
No sir....I was just walking by, heard the phone ring, though i'd help out.
Other travel agents through the years have shared stories as well. Things like:
"Do they speak English in Hawaii?"
"Can I use American money in Hawaii?"
Traveler: "I would like an train ticket"
Agent: "Certainly...where would you like to leave from?"
Traveler: "San Francisco"
Agent: "And where would you like to go to?"
Traveler: "Honolulu"
Agent: "Im afraid we can't do that"
Traveler: "Well, if you won't, I will find someone that will"
One of my all time favorites:
In 1996, the Atlanta Olympic Committee hired hundreds of volunteers to handle ticket requests for the games and its different events. One lady had placed her order and the volunteer had reminded her to bring her passport to get into the US. The customer politely informed the ticket agent that she was coming in from New Mexico. The volunteer shot back.."New Mexico, Old Mexico, I don't care...you need a passport!"
Anyone else have some examples?
I used to work at the Chase Help Desk for internal users - one day I reset a password for this guy and he said, " , I've run out of cuss words to use in my password - can you think of anymore outside of the normal ones?" ... I honestly didn't know what to say, because we're supposed to report that suff ...
I work at a help desk on a college campus so I'm surrounded by extremely intelligent dumbasses. The most common problem we get are people who get incorrect second or third hand information and refuse to believe that we could possibly know better than the friend of their roommate who told them about this one thing they are asking about. There have been times where people have left our office convinced that they are somehow going to find a fourth floor office on a building we've repeatedly said is only two stories tall.
Probably the best came late one semester around the time of finals. Kids ask us where their finals happen all the time. We never know but we can usually put them in touch with someone who will like their professor or a TA. This guy came in with that very question, and the further we dug the more evident it became that this guy wasn't much of a thinker. He could not tell us the name of the course, name of the professor, it's time or place. The best he could give us was, "It's an economics course, I think."
We gave him the phone number for the Econ. department, waited until he left, and laughed until we hurt. Something tells me that if your attendance was so spotty you don't remember when or where the class was, you're probably not going to do to well on that final.
When our office implemented rules about making tougher passwords (namely requiring caps and numbers somewhere in them) I changed all of my work passwords to " you99". I had to change them not long after that.
Everybody asks me: Do you work here?
I'm behind a register with a uniform.
I used to work at Infonxx 411 directory assistance.
I got so many people each day that you just thought to yourself "how do these people survive in the real world?"
Frequently I would get people calling for Dr. Smith (or some other popular last name in a huge city like NYC or LA), there would be dozens of doctor Smiths. I would ask them the doctor's first name they would say "doctor".
Other examples:
Directions windows pop up for caller wanting directions.
Me: What city are you located in?
Caller: I am on a bridge in Oregon on I-5 crossing a river.Me: What river? Do you know the name of the nearest town? (we did not have GPS locating).
Caller: I have no Idea.
Me: I need more specific info so I can can give you directions...I need a more specific starting point.
Me: What city and state please? I repeat this twice.
Caller:....about 10-15 seconds of silence, the caller asks do you mean the city I am in?
Me: thinking to myself (no...the city I am in)
Caller: Philadelphia, Pa.
Me: Thank you.....what is the name of the listing you are looking for?
Caller: Blockbuster on main street.
Me: I'm sorry..I do not show a blockbuster on main....do you know the cross street?
Caller: No....but I am siting in front of the store right now.
Me: Thinking again (aarghget you lazy but out of your car and just walk in). I ask them if they can see a street sign or something...trying to be polite....or is there a business close that I can find so I can locate the stret Blockbuster could be on?
Caller: Just give me the damn number.....then they just hang up on me.
Caller: I need the police for Marion, Ohio.
Me: Is this a 911 emergency? (according to their protocol)
Caller: I don't know.......I don't want to dial 911 though........(isn't that what I asked them just a second before?)
Me: Thank you, have a nice day...I connect them.
I got people who claim top work at a business for several years but did not know either the name, the number, the street, or anything about the company. I would ask the type of business for a category search and they would have no idea what they did.
I also got chewed out by a caller because I asked them what type of doctor it was so I could do a category search....like the one I described above. I was told by the caller that it was not any of my business what type of doctor it was. I trie dto explain to them that I could search by medical specialty as well but they told me to F-off they asked to speak to my supervisor.....I transfered the call and the caller told them the same thing....to F-off....the caller then hung up.
This is just the tip of the iceberg.
I work at Pizza Hut part-time delivery....Someone wanted to pay for their pizza with a debit/credit card. I said no problem...I ask them for their card number for authorization, they said "you want the whole number?" I thought..."no, I have all of it but the last four digits, I need the rest because I already know your number."
I got one like that the other day....just shook my head.Me in 1989: "Pizza Hut Delivery, this is Mike, how may I help you?"
The responses: "is this Pizza Hut?" or "do you deliver?"
Or they ask for all specials, I tell them, then they say.."I have a coupon, does that matter?"
this is a good thread
Sequ plans a vacation."Do they speak English in Hawaii?"
"Can I use American money in Hawaii?"
See -- what all of you don't realize is that we're using your frustrations with our seemingly stupid questions for our own humorous purposes.
Really. When I'm bored at work, I like to call up random people with stupid questions.
I PWN you.
Haaha, I used to book airlines tickets and people really do go overboard with this .
There was the one lady who claimed (an entire year after 9/11) that since she had blonde hair and blue eyes, she was en led to get off the plane if she saw a muslim. When I told her we would not refund her ticket because of personal choice, she asked what we were going to do about muslims on the plane.
Then there was the girl who wanted to go to 'the airport' in Australia, because apparently there is only one. When I informed her that there were indeed several airports, she asked what the price was to the biggest one. I quoted her to Auckland. She didn't catch on.
My favorite is the girl who wanted to go to Casablanca, then freaked out when I told her that it would cost almost $2,000. She asked why, and I told her travelling to Africa is very expensive. She flipped, insisting that Casablanca was in France. When I told her that it was in fact in Morocco she said that they never mentioned Morocco in the movie and she was pissed. She asked what was in France and when I mentioned Monte Carlo she said "yeah, yeah! like the car! how much to go there?" Considering I earned commissions, I wasn't too happy about wasting time with a dumb broad like this, so I decided my line accidentally disconnected her.
someone feel free to merge my thread into this.
I had someone call and ask me what the special was at Luby's...why did they call me and not Luby's I asked.
Answer. Because you work next to one and I figured you'd know.
Heres another favorite
Customer: If I'm financing it why do I have to pay interest.
I PWN you.
Well, I used to do that FOR work.
Pwned. Chode bloaded.
I had something similar happen to me.Then there was the girl who wanted to go to 'the airport' in Australia, because apparently there is only one. When I informed her that there were indeed several airports, she asked what the price was to the biggest one. I quoted her to Auckland. She didn't catch on.
Dude called in and wanted to go to SA...I asked where he wanted to fly from, he replied "Iowa"..I said, "no problem, where in Iowa"
his response..
"I don't care...just Iowa"
" me in the stairwell."
Every day, man. Every day.
I mean who calls it a "stairwell?"
I gotta say, its nice working from home now and not dealing with this bull , it restores some of my faith in humanity.
And the lack of air conditioning?
Can one of you please give me directions for posting in this forum?
Thanks in advance!!
well sir, we found corrosion on the inside of your computer, it seems a liquid was introduced into your system.
i don't know how it got there, why do i have to pay for it? why can't you stand behind your products?
I work at a Catholic Church, so on the 23rd of December we generally do not pick up the phone, and just have people leave messages and return them if they are indeed emergencies or something other than mass times.
You would be surprised how many people call and ask us what time is "Midnight Mass"...when i inform them midnight they are shocked...i get atleast 100 of these phone calls each year.
I have had that happen too.You would be surprised how many people call and ask us what time is "Midnight Mass"...when i inform them midnight they are shocked...i get atleast 100 of these phone calls each year.
"What time does the 8:30 flight leave?"
One of my all time favorites was when I was helping a guy with a trip to NYC and he needed a truck to carry his supplies for a presentation.
Me: "I can get you a 15-foot truck"
Him: "Really, how long is that?"
Every so often, we hear:
"I would like the 4:20 flight"
Yeah...wouldn't we all.
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