Oh Shit!!! (4)

[Reichen Lehmkuhl]

A fat, possibly down syndrome, lady farted right next to me earlier. For some reason I got an erection when I heard it. Is that strange?


is what strange? the fat slow lady farting or getting an erection? because i ate some turkey last night and am sure i can manage a few rips of my own. anything to see that bulge throbbing in those pants, big boy.

[Reichen Lehmkuhl]

come to think of it, midge probably is lacking in that area. for all the talking he does, he's probably sittin at about 4 1/2 inches when erect. over-compensating for something, midge? poor guy. i still would love to find out.

[midgetonadonkey]

You are pretty instinctive but I am not at 4 1/2 inches, I'm probably at about 6.

[midgetonadonkey]

I'm going to start walking with a limp. I think it will make me look cool. Cool like Fonzie.

[midgetonadonkey]

I want to kick people. Kick random people in random places.

[CuckingFunt]

I want to kick people. Kick random people in random places.
Random places geographically, or random places anatomically?

If it's anatomically, you might want to avoid the legs -- too many random people walking with a limp will make your own limp look much less cool and/or special.

[ShoogarBear]

Maybe you could go around giving random rounhouse kicks to the head.

Nahh, too Chuck Norris.

[CuckingFunt]

You're not allowed to do that until you've defeated Chuck Norris himself with a roundhouse kick to the head.

[Silver21_Black20]

Geez...you people are violent.

[ShoogarBear]

Say that again and I'll punch you in the face.

[Silver21_Black20]

Fuck Off!!

[ShoogarBear]

Geez...you people are profane.

[midgetonadonkey]

Profanity is not acceptable in this thread.

[Silver21_Black20]

Say that again and I'll kick you in the knee cap.

[midgetonadonkey]

Say that again and I'll kick you in the knee cap.

If you kick me in my kneecap I'll have to slap you with my meat.

[jman3000]

I'm fucking hungry. I think I'm gonna go buy a cantaloupe.

[midgetonadonkey]

I'm fucking hungry. I think I'm gonna go buy a cantaloupe.

How about you go buy some fucking balls.

[jman3000]

How about you go buy some fucking balls.
those would cost like 5,000 bucks on the black market... cantaloupe's are like 99 cents each.

[CuckingFunt]

I'm fucking hungry. I think I'm gonna go buy a cantaloupe.
You could, instead, kick Midge in the kneecap, since that's apparently punishable by meat slap.

[jman3000]

i like to stay away from hitting people in the kneecaps.. since i myself have a floating patella in my left knee ... and i know if i got hit in my knees... it would hurt like a bitch.

[midgetonadonkey]

You could, instead, kick Midge in the kneecap, since that's apparently punishable by meat slap.

That wouldn't be a form of punishment for him. Gay boy would probably get off on it.

[Reichen Lehmkuhl]

That wouldn't be a form of punishment for him. Gay boy would probably get off on it.


I know I do. all 5 inches of it, midgie.

[i found nemo]

i {heart} old school tia carrera

[midgetonadonkey]

I know I do. all 5 inches of it, midgie.

It's 5 and a half inches.

[CuckingFunt]

I thought it was six a few hours ago.

[jman3000]

Not only do I not have internet access at home ... but the cable company found out I had an illegal hook up and shut off my service... and even on the regular channels, I only get 35 and 29 with any semblance of clarity. I have effectively been cut off from the outside world in regards to news or anything not going on directly in my life.

[CuckingFunt]

I could respond, but it'd be too lecture-y for the Oh Shit!!! thread.

[jman3000]

i am gonna sight my rifles in this weekend... so at least that should be fun.

[midgetonadonkey]

You are pretty instinctive but I am not at 4 1/2 inches, I'm probably at about 6.

[CuckingFunt]

Silly me.

Reading about the 6" you were packin' got me all excited, and I must have read it too fast.

[midgetonadonkey]

Silly me.

Reading about the 6" you were packin' got me all excited, and I must have read it too fast.

haha

CuckingFunt is a humorous addition to this thread.

[midgetonadonkey]

I shit cum every morning. :smokin

-jman3000

[ashbeeigh]

That girl on Laguna beach is an ugly fucker. That is all.

[LaMarcus Bryant]

That one mexican chick is very ugly but her titties-man oh man look out

[oh crap]

i hate corn. i am cutting that shit out of my diet from now on. not only does it always come back in full form when i shit, but the last chick i was fucking from the back was a nasty whore and when i was pulling out a piece of corn popped out.

[midgetonadonkey]

There is a mexican chick on Laguna Beach? Is she the maid's daughter?

[oh crap]

when i have a kid, i'm gonna train that bastard from like 3 months to play golf. i'm cashing in. the next tiger woods in the making, except less black and less of a mutt.

[midgetonadonkey]

When I have a kid, I'm selling it to a Cambodian pimp for 18 pairs of penny loafers and a pound of opium.

[Johnny_Blaze_47]

So the night editor just left (before me) and I'm here for a bit more time listening to the scanners...anybody want to call in a crime to the San Angelo PD?

[oh crap]

drinking on an empty stomach is the way to go. i hate eating a big meal then trying to get drunk. what a waste of effort.

[Johnny_Blaze_47]

I hope the cop had to make this reply in front of the person he was checking.

Dispatch: I can't find any info on this guy.

Cop: It's not a guy.

Was this Pat?

[ashbeeigh]

That one mexican chick is very ugly but her titties-man oh man look out

When she gets rid of her baby fat in like two years those will be gone. It's garansheed.

[LaMarcus Bryant]

When she gets rid of her baby fat in like two years those will be gone. It's garansheed.


Theres no fucking way....sure they'll be smaller but they're giNORMOUS right now....they'll still be huge after the transition. Gauransheed.

[CuckingFunt]

When she gets rid of her baby fat in like two years those will be gone. It's garansheed.
Not necessarily. Mine got bigger when I grew up and trimmed down.

[Uncle_Jesse]

Not necessarily. Mine got bigger when I grew up and trimmed down.


have sweet mercy. :smokin

[sijiexi]

open my eyes, my god!

[Uncle Jesse]

What the fuck? I'm the original Uncle Jesse bitch.

[Mrs.Tlong]

Whoa !!! there's 2 Uncle Jesse's ???:wow :wow

can you say Mrs.Tlong sandwich ? :smokin

[ashbeeigh]

Not necessarily. Mine got bigger when I grew up and trimmed down.

It was the opposite with mine, but mine are just genetically huge. We'll just have to wait until MTV does a spin off on a fatty.

[midgetonadonkey]

MTV will never do anything involving a fat person. Eventhough we are the majority, we are still being oppressed and misrepresented by the mainstream media. I think fat people should be all over movies, television and magazines.

[midgetonadonkey]

http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h290/midgetonadonkey/heythrefh3.jpg


Ashebeeigh sent me this picture of her at the age of 12.

[midgetonadonkey]

http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h290/midgetonadonkey/extraheadcopykh4.jpg

[midgetonadonkey]

I need to start looking more professional. I think I'm going to start carrying around a briefcase. For all my important briefs and files.

[midgetonadonkey]

I think Uncle Jesse should kick the shit out of the fake new Uncle Jesse. The OG Uncle Jesse is the man.

[Party troll]

http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k77/partytroll/lauren3.jpg

lauren sanchez is gonna have my baby

[Party troll]

http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h290/midgetonadonkey/heythrefh3.jpg


Ashebeeigh sent me this picture of her at the age of 12.


:lol :lol

[CuckingFunt]

lauren sanchez is gonna have my baby
Then you should give it to Midge for a cut of the 18 pairs of penny loafers. Hard to turn down a deal like that.

[Silver21_Black20]

I need to start looking more professional. I think I'm going to start carrying around a briefcase. For all my important briefs and files.

Are you going to start wearing a tie too?

[midgetonadonkey]

Are you going to start wearing a tie too?

I just might.

[Party troll]

Then you should give it to Midge for a cut of the 18 pairs of penny loafers. Hard to turn down a deal like that.


you trying to short me out of a cut on the pound of opium? :madrun

[Party troll]

http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k77/partytroll/untitled.jpg

[Party troll]

http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k77/partytroll/price1.jpg

not even I get this wasted

[ashbeeigh]

http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h290/midgetonadonkey/heythrefh3.jpg


Ashebeeigh sent me this picture of her at the age of 12.

You wish I were that hot at 12.

[Uncle_Jesse]

http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k77/partytroll/lauren3.jpg




oh momma, she makes me say have mercy.

[midgetonadonkey]

Who the fuck ripped off my troll? What the fuck?!? Using the same sig and everything. Show yourself!!

I bet it's 1Billups1.

[Silver21_Black20]

You wish I were that hot at 12.

:lol That was actually pretty funny ashbeeigh.

[midgetonadonkey]

:lol That was actually pretty funny ashbeeigh.

Don't throw compliments her way. It's like giving a retard a cookie, you will never be able to get rid of them after that.

[Uncle Jesse]

The fake Uncle Jesse will die by my hand.

[ashbeeigh]

:lol That was actually pretty funny ashbeeigh.

After I posted it I realized my frammar was incorrect...it should have been "You wish I was that hot when I was 12." Either way, I'm glad it made you laugh.

[Silver21_Black20]

Don't throw compliments her way. It's like giving a retard a cookie, you will never be able to get rid of them after that.

That was, I'm sure, the first compliment she has ever recieved. I'm sure it won't go to her head.

[ashbeeigh]

So, I have a day off. I have to baby sit the neighbor's sick grandkids. Fun times, fun times.

[Silver21_Black20]

I have the next three weeks off......Ugh!!!!!!!

[midgetonadonkey]

I have the next three weeks off......Ugh!!!!!!!

You should take up gardening or knitting. One of those two hobbies.

[Silver21_Black20]

You should take up gardening or knitting. One of those two hobbies.

It is too hot outside for gardening. Maybe I'll pick up knitting, would you like for me to knit you a sweater?

[midgetonadonkey]

Why don't you just knit your ass back in the kitchen and make me a fucking pie.

[Silver21_Black20]

Why don't you just knit your ass back in the kitchen and make me a fucking pie.

:lmao If I were you, I'd practice on being a hard-ass.

[midgetonadonkey]

http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h290/midgetonadonkey/anorexia41ob7.jpg

[SpursWoman]

Jesus Christ ... no shit "fuck sandwiches". Give that bitch the whole loaf of bread and the entire cow.

[midgetonadonkey]

smegma

[midgetonadonkey]

This really blows. Where the fuck is my batman??

[CuckingFunt]

http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h290/midgetonadonkey/anorexia41ob7.jpg
I wonder if she knows she's supposed to be eating those sandwiches, not fucking them.

[midgetonadonkey]

I wonder if she knows she's supposed to be eating those sandwiches, not fucking them.

Have you ever fucked a sandwich?

[Uncle_Jesse]

I cheated on Becky last night. I feel kind of bad, but oh well. I'm a ladies man.

[CuckingFunt]

Have you ever fucked a sandwich?
I have not.

You?

[tlongII]

http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h290/midgetonadonkey/anorexia41ob7.jpg

Please tell me this is Photoshopped.

[SpursWoman]

Please tell me this is Photoshopped.


This? From the emaciated chick hitter himself?!?! :wow :lol

[sa_butta]

Introduce her to this guy

http://www.liquidfocus.com.au/albums/WeirdnWonderful/anorexia.sized.jpg

[ashbeeigh]

blllahhh. I hate packing and moving.

[Silver21_Black20]

I was walking into my room and I hit my elbow on the doorknob and now it hurts like hell...Owwww!!!!

[Jekka]

Please tell me this is Photoshopped.

That's Gisele's face, and she isn't that thin, so it has to be photoshopped, but there are some models that are pretty fucking gross. Case in point, the following detail picture in the Fall 2006 Vera Wang Fashion Week show and the Fall 2006 Armani show, respectively:
http://www.style.com/slideshows/fashionshows/F2006RTW/VWANG/DETAILS/00060m.jpghttp://www.style.com/slideshows/fashionshows/F2006RTW/GARMANI/RUNWAY/00660m.jpg

Why being that thin is considered an asset I have no idea. It's gross.

In other news, I am consuming extra calories for these under-nourished women by opening a bottle of Prosecco :drunk Commence tipsy-posting.

[LaMarcus Bryant]

http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h290/midgetonadonkey/heythrefh3.jpg


Ashebeeigh sent me this picture of her at the age of 12.


rofl :smokin

[LaMarcus Bryant]

smegma


LOL


midge makes everyone else look like manny after he turned republican

[TheTruth]

ashbeigh was hot as a kid

[midgetonadonkey]

http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h290/midgetonadonkey/DinosaursBaby.jpg

[midgetonadonkey]

That picture scares the shit out of me.

[ashbeeigh]

ashbeigh was hot as a kid

hell yes I was.

[ashbeeigh]

oh oww. After I sent that I hit my elbow on the little thing my keyboard is on. fuck me for being a smart ass.

[midgetonadonkey]

oh oww. After I sent that I hit my elbow on the little thing my keyboard is on. fuck me for being a smart ass.

Fuck you for just being you.

[LaMarcus Bryant]

i wish i were fat

[midgetonadonkey]

i wish i were fat

Drink a 12 pack a night for about 4 years and your wish will be granted.

[LaMarcus Bryant]

Is that what you used to do?

my stomach isn't big enough to allow that, in fact i've already tried it. I could only drink about 7 or 8 a night before falling asleep with my bloatedness

[midgetonadonkey]

Is that what you used to do?

my stomach isn't big enough to allow that, in fact i've already tried it. I could only drink about 7 or 8 a night before falling asleep with my bloatedness

Yeah I used to do that. I just drank as much as possible. I started with a six pack and then I moved up to a six pack of pints. After that I started adding 40's to my six packs of pints. Eventually I just moved to 12 packs.

[LaMarcus Bryant]

12 beers a night? Dude doesn't that get expen$$$ive?

[midgetonadonkey]

12 beers a night? Dude doesn't that get expen$$$ive?

12 packs of Schlitz are $4.99 at HEB

That really helped.

[ashbeeigh]

You know what midge? I just don't care for your attitude anymore. I just don't.

[CuckingFunt]

You know what midge? I just don't care for your attitude anymore. I just don't.
Really odd that that was the post that broke the camel's back.

[ashbeeigh]

12 beers a night? Dude doesn't that get expen$$$ive?

You could always split a 24 with a friend. That's what all the drunks do at school.

[ashbeeigh]

Really odd that that was the post that broke the camel's back.

It needed the sarcasm color. The blue or whatever it is. Isn't iot blue? I should edit it.

[CuckingFunt]

I don't know what color it is. Good sarcasm needs no color.

[midgetonadonkey]

You know what midge? I just don't care for your attitude anymore. I just don't.

Can't handle the ball busting anymore? You are sounding more and more like Horry everyday. Maybe you should start putting the :smokin after all of your posts.

[ashbeeigh]

True True, my sarcasm needs to be tuned up a bit CuntingFunt.

[CuckingFunt]

CuntingFunt? Not even I know what that means.

[ashbeeigh]

I'm more hard core than that San Marcos party hopping "ass kicking :smokin pansy. :lmao Yeah. Straight up. No lies. I'll take you.

[midgetonadonkey]

I'm more hard core than that San Marcos party hopping "ass kicking :smokin pansy. :lmao Yeah. Straight up. No lies. I'll take you.

Just because you get pissed on doesn't make you more hardcore than Horry. Horry fucks transvestites.

[ashbeeigh]

CuntingFunt? Not even I know what that means.

me neither. Geez. CuckingFunt, I'm sorry.

[Silver21_Black20]

Shit...my elbow still hurts, as my batman would say, "Like something fierce!!!"

[midgetonadonkey]

Shit...my elbow still hurts, as my batman would say, "I love cock!!!"

[CuckingFunt]

Funny bone injuries hurt like a sumbitch.

[Silver21_Black20]

I didn't even hit my funny bone.

It hurts when I bend my elbow.

[midgetonadonkey]

I didn't even hit my funny bone.

It hurts when I bend my elbow.

I think you dislocated it. Actually, I'm sure of it. Pop that bitch back into place like Jew hater Mel Gibson in the Lethal Weapon series.

[CuckingFunt]

Have you tried icing it?

[CuckingFunt]

"I done bent my elby bone so that it points in the opposity direction." -- Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yok'l

[GoGoGadget]

Do us both a favor and shove your elbow into my asshole. I promise it will feel ten times better once you take it out.

[ashbeeigh]

I didn't even hit my funny bone.

It hurts when I bend my elbow.

Try to lick it, it'll take your mind off the pain.






























I kid.

[CuckingFunt]

Oh Fill... I mean, Gadget, I was beginning to miss you.

[ashbeeigh]

A Samuel L Jackson troll? Should I waste my money, oh excuse me, spend my money, on Snakes on a Plane?

[Fillmoe]

Oh Fill... I mean, Gadget, I was beginning to miss you.


:king

to take a page from norcals book..... "that aint me bluh"

[Fillmoe]

A Samuel L Jackson troll? Should I waste my money, oh excuse me, spend my money, on Snakes on a Plane?

wrong thread

[CuckingFunt]

:king

to take a page from norcals book..... "that aint me bluh"
Okay. If you say so.

[Fillmoe]

Okay. If you say so.

I do say so :fro :drunk :hat :madrun :elephant :blah :spin :rolleyes

[ashbeeigh]

wrong thread

See, you don't understand. This is the thread where you can say whatever you want with no consequences. That was my two cents. Not to mention, he was just viewing the thread. So.

[Samuel L Jackson]

A Samuel L Jackson troll? Should I waste my money, oh excuse me, spend my money, on Snakes on a Plane?

yes you deserve to die and I hope you burn in hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[ashbeeigh]

midgetonadonkey? Where have your jokes gone? Was I too harsh?? He'll come back swinging later. Yessir. Man, I'm wide awake now. Y'all are screwed tonight.

[CuckingFunt]

Y'all are screwed tonight.
No, I'm not. Unfortunately. If I was, I wouldn't be wasting my time with this shit.

[Silver21_Black20]

midgetonadonkey? Where have your jokes gone? Was I too harsh?? He'll come back swinging later. Yessir. Man, I'm wide awake now. Y'all are screwed tonight.

I wouldn't be egging him on if I were you.

[ashbeeigh]

You two are very smart. If only I could be this smart when school starts in four days.

[Jekka]

Sucks to be you, ashbeeigh.

[CuckingFunt]

If everyone were as smart as me...

well... the world would actually probably be a much better place... but it wouldn't be anywhere near as much fun for me without the ability to feel so much groovier than everyone else.

[Jekka]

I don't know why I subject myself to sudoku. I suck so badly at it - it's like proof that I have no left brain.

[CuckingFunt]

I've yet to jump on the sudoku bandwagon. The last thing in the world I need is to get hooked on a new time waster.

[ashbeeigh]

Sucks to be you, ashbeeigh.

Obviously. Not having their cunning wit is going to hurt me so badly in life. Or are you talkiing about starting school?

[ashbeeigh]

Apperantly some girl is going to do an experiment with sudokus this semester. We had some type of tournament in April at a little coffee house on the main street in Seguin. It went over really well with everyone on campus. It also raised some money for the group that takes in animals during emergencies in Guadalupe county through the entrance fee.

[Silver21_Black20]

Fucking Aye...in reading most of your posts, you should have went to summer school, Ash.

[NASpurs]

Oh ashbeeigh, don't you ever notice that no one cares about what you say? Take that into consideration when you make future posts. K thx.

[ashbeeigh]

Fucking Aye...in reading most of your posts, you should have went to summer school, Ash.

No, just learned how to type in elementary school.

[ashbeeigh]

Oh ashbeeigh, don't you ever notice that no one cares about what you say? Take that into consideration when you make future posts. K thx.
The only thing I can see no one would care about would be the experiment... that was just my segway. Everyone loves coffee and sudokus. And yes, I have noticed. Thanks for pointing it out.

[Silver21_Black20]

No, just learned how to type in elementary school.

What about spelling? Have you yet to cover that in your academics.

[Jekka]

I've yet to jump on the sudoku bandwagon. The last thing in the world I need is to get hooked on a new time waster.
Biggest time-waster ever. And yet disturbingly addictive - worse than solitaire. Much worse.

[NASpurs]

Just wait until you get to the super hard ones, spend 40 minutes on it, you make one fucking mistake and either shout in horror or just kill someone. Good times.

[CuckingFunt]

Biggest time-waster ever. And yet disturbingly addictive - worse than solitaire. Much worse.
I'll definitely cross that off the to-do list, then.

[midgetonadonkey]

Ashbeeigh=Horry For 3!

[ashbeeigh]

What about spelling? Have you yet to cover that in your academics.

It's on the to-do list. It is.

[Party troll]

9 bucks and i'm pretty fucked up.. not too bad

[Party troll]

in fact, considering all the booze i drank and the herb i just blew, 9 bucks for a night is relatively cheap

[Silver21_Black20]

I need some alcohol, maybe I can drink my sorrows away.

[midgetonadonkey]

I need some alcohol, maybe I can drink my sorrows away.

I'm sorry you have sorrows.

[angel_luv]

I need some alcohol, maybe I can drink my sorrows away.


:depressed

What is wrong?

[Silver21_Black20]

:depressed

What is wrong?

Nothing...I think I'm just bored.

[angel_luv]

Nothing...I think I'm just bored.


Be bored no more then. :)

[MarkV]

I need some alcohol, maybe I can drink my sorrows away.
Just get yourself some cheap whisky, an 8 ball, and a couple of hits of midnight orange. You'll forget you have sorrows. You may forget you have feet too.

[LaMarcus Bryant]

Biggest time-waster ever. And yet disturbingly addictive - worse than solitaire. Much worse.



At least it is proven to exercise your brain, right?

[Silver21_Black20]

Just get yourself some cheap whisky, an 8 ball, and a couple of hits of midnight orange. You'll forget you have sorrows. You may forget you have feet too.

Hmmmm......sounds good.

You are a newbie, (maybe)...tell us about yourself.

[CuckingFunt]

Jesus on a Buddah! Am I ever bored tonight.

[Uncle_Jesse]

have mercy. what's goin on in this thread?

[GoGoGadget]

Jesus on a Buddah! Am I ever bored tonight.

Why don't we do what we do every night and masturbate fifteen times?

[Uncle_Jesse]

Jesus on a Buddah! Am I ever bored tonight.


look here, pretty lady, uncle jess can take care of that. :smokin

[CuckingFunt]

look here, pretty lady, uncle jess can take care of that. :smokin
What can a fake Uncle Jesse do to end my boredom?

[Carlton]

Jesus on a Buddah! Am I ever bored tonight.

we could go upstairs and dance to tom jones if you want

[Uncle_Jesse]

What can a fake Uncle Jesse do to end my boredom?


you'll find there is nothing fake when it counts. plus, i am truer to the grain than the uncreative uncle jesse. regardless, after rocking a gig I can show you why the ladies always want me.

[Uncle Jesse]

have mercy. what's goin on in this thread?

I'm going to rape your fucking mother. That's what's going on.

[Uncle Jesse]

You will be begging me to have fucking mercy on you and your dope fiend mother. Fucking cock sucker.

[MarkV]

Hmmmm......sounds good.

You are a newbie, (maybe)...tell us about yourself.
I am one bored son of a bitch who has nothing better to do tonight than troll random forums and give advise of a highly illegal nature. The Fresh Prince re-runs on Nick are getting old and my bottle of Herradura Anejo is empty. Looks like another night in paradise.

[Uncle Jesse]

I'm the real Uncle Fucking Jesse bitch.

[CuckingFunt]

you'll find there is nothing fake when it counts. plus, i am truer to the grain than the uncreative uncle jesse. regardless, after rocking a gig I can show you why the ladies always want me.
I'll pass, thanks.

[MarkV]

You will be begging me to have fucking mercy on you and your dope fiend mother. Fucking cock sucker.
Holy shit - I guess I'm not the most bored fuck in here. I can't touch a dumb ass who is actually going to impersonate a character from a lame shit television show from 15 years ago. Where's JJ Walker at??

[MarkV]

Dope fiend. That's a funny expression

[CuckingFunt]

Where's JJ Walker at??
Careful what you wish for. We'll soon have the entire cast of "Good Times" in here.

[Uncle Jesse]

Holy shit - I guess I'm not the most bored fuck in here. I can't touch a dumb ass who is actually going to impersonate a character from a lame shit television show from 15 years ago. Where's JJ Walker at??

Stupid fucking n00b. Go dig up your dead grandfather and fuck what's left of his asshole.

[MarkV]

we could go upstairs and dance to tom jones if you want
goddamn it! I change the channel from Nick and I still cant get away from this midget.

[Nasir Jones]

I'll pass, thanks.

Aye girl Kelis is gone for a week promoting her new album, maybe you can come over and I can tap that ass. Then we can go to sleep, wake up and do it all over again. How does that sound?

[MarkV]

Stupid fucking n00b. Go dig up your dead grandfather and fuck what's left of his asshole.
Noob. That's another funny word. I'm guessing you're out of lotion tonight and the gay porn just isnt doing what it used to for you anymore. Where's a .38 when you need one, right?

[midgetonadonkey]

Trolls are getting really lame. The I found Nemo troll is the fucking worst.

[Nasir Jones]

Holy shit - I guess I'm not the most bored fuck in here. I can't touch a dumb ass who is actually going to impersonate a character from a lame shit television show from 15 years ago. Where's JJ Walker at??


JJ Evans get gunned up and clapped quick his whole dam record label gunned up and clapped quick

[MarkV]

Aye girl Kelis is gone for a week promoting her new album, maybe you can come over and I can tap that ass. Then we can go to sleep, wake up and do it all over again. How does that sound?
Is Nas even still alive? I figured he got shot with the rest of them long ago.

[Nasir Jones]

Is Nas even still alive? I figured he got shot with the rest of them long ago.

Aye peep this you mark ass bitch. Of course I am alive how else would I be posting?

[CuckingFunt]

Aye girl Kelis is gone for a week promoting her new album, maybe you can come over and I can tap that ass. Then we can go to sleep, wake up and do it all over again. How does that sound?
Having a guy ask to "tap that ass" gets me wet as the Sahara desert.

[MarkV]

Aye peep this you mark ass bitch. Of course I am alive how else would I be posting?
I don't know. Maybe you got dug up and fucked in the asshole by Uncle Jesse here and his magical touch brought you back to life. I hear that's how 2pac keeps making records.

[MarkV]

Having a guy ask to "tap that ass" gets me wet as the Sahara desert.
Considering the source, I'd say it was damn romantic

[Nasir Jones]

I don't know. Maybe you got dug up and fucked in the asshole by Uncle Jesse here and his magical touch brought you back to life. I hear that's how 2pac keeps making records.


Nah son, I been alive. I AM GODS SON! I shall forgive you because you must not have known.

[CuckingFunt]

Where's Squid? Fucking tease offered me a tentacle fuck and then disappeared.

[Nasir Jones]

Having a guy ask to "tap that ass" gets me wet as the Sahara desert.

Well if that dont work mah, how 'bout I just flash 100 grand and you hop on my dick anyways? Works with all the other hoes. By the way did I ever tell you I am the King of NY?

[MarkV]

Wow, we're some bored, patheic fucks in here. Makes me long for some hydrocodone or something. I shouldnt have taken a nap during the day

[Johnny_Blaze_47]

So I've got most of today and all of tomorrow paid time off since the paper doesn't want to pay me any overtime.

Mind you, this paper is going to be down to 3 reporters coming tomorrow (and tomorrow was my last day) and they cover a city of 100,000.

I hope some shit doesn't go down tomorrow.

Anyways, let me get back to the thread.

1. Midge...is that troll worse than the fake, fake black guys?

2. ASF, I'm finally listening to Reckless Kelly...not bad, I'm going to buy the album later today.

3. Cucking, if Squid doesn't come around, well, how you doin'?

[angel_luv]

I think the trolls only come out at night Johnny Blaze. :lol

[Johnny_Blaze_47]

I think the trolls only come out at night Johnny Blaze. :lol

Damnit!

I had to work last night and I have to pack tonight to move tomorrow.

That's okay, V, you're here...did you have a good birthday?

[ashbeeigh]

I need to get my haircut, finish packing, and go shopping. Yeees. Today will be lovely.

[batman2883]

i am but a mere pebble on the beach, a leaf on a twig, the ink in a pen......but when im unleashed there is no end to my fury

[batman2883]

im the greatest rapper alive
nigga ask about me

[batman2883]

hey kira how you doing

[batman2883]

when are you gonna come over and cook me a traditional filipino dinner?

[katyon6th]

Let's not pretend we're friends or some shit.

[batman2883]

my grandma and your grandma
were sitting by the fire
my grandma said to your grandma
im gonna set your hair on fire
talking about hey now hey now
iko iko way nah

[katyon6th]

Just kidding, I love you.

I'll never cook for you, though.

[batman2883]

Let's not pretend we're friends or some shit.
wow thats harsh

[batman2883]

i thought you and i were bestest pals in the world

[batman2883]

Just kidding, I love you.

I'll never cook for you, though.
ill cook some african gumbo for you

[midgetonadonkey]

Is it true batman has been deported back to Puerto Rico and now can only access the internet from the gay bath house he frequents?

[batman2883]

i once knew a fellow named matty
his hair was really crappy
he drank some pabst with the best,
but his friends left a mess
by puking in the garbage,

[katyon6th]

Wait a fucking minute ... I thought batman was from Mexico?????

[batman2883]

Is it true batman has been deported back to Puerto Rico and now can only access the internet from the gay bath house he frequents?
this is a rumor strictly a rumor and as such should be contested by every person that batman has met in his life

[batman2883]

Wait a fucking minute ... I thought batman was from Mexico?????
kira im not from mexico you damn cunt muscle.......so if you eat chihuahua's for dinner tonight i wont be offended

[midgetonadonkey]

Wait a fucking minute ... I thought batman was from Mexico?????

That's right. Mexico. My bad.

[midgetonadonkey]

kira im not from mexico you damn cunt muscle.......so if you eat chihuahua's for dinner tonight i wont be offended

:lmao cunt muscle

[batman2883]

That's right. Mexico. My bad.
midge ill remind your mother of your fowl language when i skeet in her face tonight

[batman2883]

:lmao cunt muscle
i thought you'd enjoy that midge

[midgetonadonkey]

midge ill remind your mother of your fowl language when i skeet in her face tonight

Fowl language? Am I speaking in the language of the bird?

[batman2883]

Fowl language? Am I speaking in the language of the bird?
yes you're turkey verbage is getting on my last peacock

[batman2883]

why cant we be friends....why cant we be friends

[midgetonadonkey]

Remember when you bought the fajitas and got the sausage for free?

[batman2883]

anyone going to the pants party tonight?

[batman2883]

Remember when you bought the fajitas and got the sausage for free?
the sausage was free man the sausage was fucking free

[batman2883]

damn i could go for some damn pf changes soon man

[katyon6th]

How do you get free sausage, batman?

[midgetonadonkey]

Let's go to Mexico to check out the donkey show and get some ten dollar whores.

[midgetonadonkey]

How do you get free sausage, batman?

He puts roofies in guy's drinks.

[batman2883]

heb specials ask matty........and midge....lets go man lets go

[batman2883]

He puts roofies in guy's drinks.
giggity giggity

[katyon6th]

He puts roofies in guy's drinks.

Figures.

Batman is a nasty motherfucker.

[midgetonadonkey]

Figures.

Batman is a nasty motherfucker.

I hear he loves licking his own shit off of random guy's cocks.

[Marklar MM]

Oh, Shit son.

[batman2883]

erroneous erroneous

[batman2883]

awwwll right

[batman2883]

giggity giggity

[katyon6th]

I'm glad you changed your avatar, bat.

It was just ... weird.

[batman2883]

i love melissa i cant help it, i would suck her little toes

[batman2883]

if she so requested

[midgetonadonkey]

I wouldn't suck any chicks toes.

[batman2883]

i would do some amazing things to jessica alba feet

[Marklar MM]

Toes....Yummy.

[midgetonadonkey]

I'd be too busy sucking other parts of her body to worry about fucking with the feet.

[midgetonadonkey]

I would literally slurp shit out of her ass. That's how hard I'd be sucking on her asshole.

[batman2883]

its called foreplay ......get them all grazed up and excited but thats only for special women...others just get the gagooty in their gaboinkity.....

[Party troll]

Let's go to Mexico to check out the donkey show and get some ten dollar whores.


good times. tequila is on me :drunk

[batman2883]

im the one and only true party troll

[Silver21_Black20]

Oh how I've missed batman....more than midge has missed batman.

[midgetonadonkey]

I have arrived to drink the blood of the wicked.

[midgetonadonkey]

If I ever had a band it would be named MurderDeathFuK and we would be an Electric Light Orchestra cover band.

[midgetonadonkey]

Hello. How are you?

Have you been alright, through all those lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely nights

That's what I'd say. I'd tell you everything

If you'd pick up that telephone

[midgetonadonkey]

Why hasn't Melmart posted in here? What the fuck happened to us? We used to be like sisters.

[TOP-CHERRY]

Step one: you say "we need to talk"
He walks, you say "sit down, it's just a talk"
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
And you begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best
Cause after all, you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours, and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed

He will do one of two things:
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

How to save a life